My mother asked me if I am seeing anyone today
I thought of you
And the happiness I feel for you
I thought of how your laugh sounds
And the music you make inside of me
I thought of how your eyes sparkle
And how you speak
I thought of how hearing from you
Makes my bones crumble
And my eyes crinkle at the corners
I thought of the conversations
And the secrets that we keep
I thought of the burning in my guts
And the desire to be caressed by your gentleness

I told her that I am not seeing anyone
Because although I am captivated
I know we will never be whole
You are one half beauty
And I am one half tragedy
And neither of us can explain it
So I smiled, “maybe someday,” I said

I thought of how it would feel to love you
And how it would feel to be loved
I thought of living with you
And staying when you are gone
I thought of home
And suddenly it was you

But we cannot be complete
Because your heart lies in another's hands
And I could never compare
With the markings she left on you
So I grit my teeth
And bite my lip
And try to find a place
Where happiness could someday be with you.