The inevitables of life have really been getting to me lately
I didn't know her very well but
She died and... it made me question my entire being
It really really bugs me.
I couldn't even cry and still can't and that bugs me even more
Now I don't even know what I want anymore
and I have this impending doom  creeping in my chest
 "The world could end tomorrow and I have wasted my life"
kind of doom.
Now I am a third the way through it
And I can't go back
More likely half

The underwater explorer,
a man on the moon,
the world saving scientist,
love...children
And that's it.
Dreams are just that.
until they die or are killed by
someone elses dream
And I'm sitting here watching my closest friends go through it
Every stage from young until old
Realizing that I have been staring into a mirror
my entire life

Locked in a box made of societal issues so thick I can't hear the people screaming at me
"Your life is a lie and so is mine!"

The dread is overwhelming
That IS the wisdom.
One simple problem one simple answer
It all ends the same
No one ever gets young
And we all think there is plenty of time.