When I look in the mirror in the morning, I feel fine. I brush my hair. I am fine. I brush my teeth, And I am fine.
Then I notice how my teeth aren’t as white as they could be. But I'm still fine.
Then I put on my clothes and I notice how I spill over the sides. But I am fine. Then I notice how my hips jut out And my jeans are never long enough in the ankles.
Then I spend ten minutes thinking of changing my jeans, Because this shirt is too tight But I opt for a hoodie instead. Then I am lost in the hoodie. I feel like a blob of fabric. And then just a blob.
I get in my car and look in the mirror to adjust And notice how dark under my eyes are. When I’m pretty sure they weren’t that dark earlier.
As I drive to school, I notice my hands on the steering wheel And ponder how they can be both fat and scraggly at the same time.
I get to school and notice people staring at me at the red lights While I begin to cross the road.
I pass windows and with each one, I notice my thighs grow larger with each step. I notice how wide I am when I pass other girls Then I think about my ankles and I swear I can feel them swell.
By the time it is twelve o’clock, I have convinced myself that I am a Bulging, Suffocating, Beast Who tramples everyone in the room. And the Earth is suddenly too small for someone as big as I am.