you aren't helping yourself you know. you are feeding that feelings that's been clawing your heart. you're feeding it. yet you want to be free from it. yet it made you tired and you want to give-up. please don't i can tell you this, you are stronger than you think you are. stop dwelling in this darkness, in this pain and suffering, he is willing to help you, guide you, lead you, love you and never leave you. Jesus loves you.
he is such an amazing God and he is so real and so personal. At first i actually didn.t care about God, and cursed and sweared and bullies. And i only went to Church because i HAD to. But then, God met me in a camp. We were doing worship and his presence just flooded the room like it was so so strong i could like still feel it. its so amazing and so so real. And i could just feel his embrace i could literally feel him embracing me. he is so real!!! He wants a RELATIONSHIP with you.... my testimony :)))