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Oct 2018
Skin so soft, like a baby, smooth to the touch
I love to sit and run my fingers up and down your back, or your arm, or anywhere really.
But your not a baby, you’re a man
A man who knew hardship and struggle
long before you knew what it was to enjoy the finer things in life.

My heart jumped and my eyes could not look away from you the first time we met.
With your shirt off on a hot summer day,
your smooth skin enticed me before I even knew who you really were.

And here I sit two years later, thinking back on that first day
When our love had just began, how much I already loved you in those first few moments.

And I wonder, how can one man be so **** good?
You never raise your voice or berate me,
you only show your undying love for me.

And maybe that’s why I so often push you away,
because Ive never known a love so pure.
Ive never had one man, or person for that matter, love me so wholly the way you do.

I couldn’t imagine my world without you,
yet I never fail to let you know how much better my life would be without you in it.
Maybe I don’t know how to love, or maybe I don’t want to be loved,
Maybe I want you and everyone else to hate me, just as I hate myself to my very core.
I pray everyday that I can be as women as you are man.
That I can wear my heart on my sleeve as you do.

That I can tell you my real feelings,
that I can tell you, you are my world.

But then you would know,
And I would be left open like a book, and vulnerable.
Maybe one day, when I'm ready of course, I’ll let you in and let you fully see who I really am
One lost soul among a million, tainted and imperfect.

Until then I love you more than you can know, even though I never let those emotions show.
I love you, I do.
Amber
Written by
Amber  26/F/Upstate New York
(26/F/Upstate New York)   
  265
   Imari Stevens and FraisDeLaFerme
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