I lay on my bed early morning After having to wake up at 5 am Not that I wanted my night to end that fast All I think about is how much of a big mistake My stupid want for someone was I should have been a little selfish Then I would have seen through the pretext But blinded for a need of someone I didn't need I got something I didn't want Then I had to accept And learn to love something that was a bad idea in the first place And now here we are As I radiate in my love for him I can't help but shed tears Of how it all hurts That I didn't know it would be this hard But pushing forward is all that can be done For looking back just brings more tears And when you have the audacity To call me any day to make yourself feel better I get to understand That I'm perhaps the only one Who cares too much about other people Enough to forget my own happiness
Today I made coffee Not sure how that happened Because I'm allergic to coffee Then my eyes got to open And I saw how frustrated I am Not sure what holds more account to my frustration But one, two, three and perhaps more men Are on top of the list
It's time I made peace With the fact that I was used And of course duped Into caring for someone And perhaps people Who don't give a ****
Now that you are into my life My little source of joy And sometimes frustration But my love for you Can never compare to any Even though I'm never going to get enough sleep Or time for myself My love for you will never go away
The other day Another asked to see me Not because he would come But for me, and my baby To travel and go see him Not to count the counties he needed us to cross And hours on the bus Yet he isn't even sure he wants us I'm not even sure what to say about him
But now my dear Its time I accepted That I am responsible For both you and me And that sleep is a luxury And that mommy Is always right And that's me
Now that the best view Comes from the hardest climb We're going to get the view Not sure when But the patience and perseverance Will be definitely worth it