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Apr 2018
Outside, a gale is blowing
You tell yourself,
"I'm safe in here"
When you know you're leaving tomorrow
Find yourself wondering,
Will it be a breath of
Fresh air at last?
Or will it just be
Another attack on your lungs,
Another series of spasms in your arms
In your legs,
In 5 hours of being trapped
In a white metal box
Will you be as fine as you have over the years?
Or will you break
As you did only
Days ago?
Breathe deep before closing your eyes
See, again, procrastinating to sleep
Just to trick youreslf into
Thinking the morning's come slower
A blue fan covered in flowers
A keychain with a silver skull
You've never had a problem
With being in your own world
But what happens if
They take you out
Put you
In the spotlight
When you're busy hiding behind a book
Coz you don't mind attention
When you're dressed for the stage
But lately, you've been dragged to performances
In your PJ's
And people wonder why you start panicking
People wonder why you got nothing to say
People think, "What do you mean, you're not ready? -
"Aren't you supposed to be the confident one?"
The thing about feigning confidence all the time is people don't believe you when you start having huge problems with anxiety.
Lorenzo Neltje
Written by
Lorenzo Neltje  18/FTM/Australia
(18/FTM/Australia)   
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