i wish it was easier to be in love with you.
if i could feel a little less helpless,
a little less completely lost within loving you.
when you aren't around i feel weak,
afraid, half-empty.
and when you are...
when your arm is around my shoulders,
and your thumb is doing that gentle rubbing thing on my thigh,
when you let me take up my space in your bed,
and kiss my forehead before i leave...
loving you is so difficult, so painstaking and cruel
and time-consuming,
but i never thought it would be this easy
to want one thing with every little breath in my body.
to throw my whole self into wanting you and only you
is the simplest thing i have ever done.
to jump off the cliff was a no-brainer;
to fall lifelessly and wholeheartedly was uncomplicated.
it's the loving that is so **** tremendous.
out of all the things i've done,
the friends i've buried and lies i've told,
to be in love with you is the hardest of them all.
this heartache is nearly impossible,
but not loving you would be even worse.
you are endless
and you will be my end.
how do you hold a moonbeam in your hand?