Why are some days harder than others.
Why is it that today of all days it got a little harder?
Why of all days did I think about you and cry a little harder?

Maybe it's because I finally see you for who you really are.
Maybe its because I finally realize everything you said, did and felt was an out right absolute lie.
Maybe its because I finally realized no matter what moments we had shared together and no matter how special I thought they were...they actually weren't...

If you asked me what killed me more... I wouldn't have an answer.

How the **** do you tell yourself it wasen't real?
How do you tell your heart..
It was all a lie?
The love was all just onesided?
How do you tell yourself you have to forget?
You have to move on?
That even though your heart might be breaking....
His isn't...


Love has cursed me...
And so have you.

I'm glad you can walk this earth without feeling anything.
Never loving anyone.
Never feeling the excruciating pain of a broken heart.
The kind that  paralyzes you.
The kind that leaves a permanent mark on your heart.

I ******* hate it.