in love with
linoleum pressing into the side of my face
the familiarity
lapsing reminders
to sleep
eat to
give into ritualistic habits of
living

exchanged the need
desire
with the pulsing sensations
of a beating heart
drying salivary glands  

is this existence
once your brain cells have all lined up
two decades in
the never ending string
pulling through your throat
repeating the same
anxious anecdotes
of

no one could possibly
relate to this
narrowing pit
that we're not going to
make it out of this alive
no one ever has