Kissing you
Feels as though I'm levitating
Above all the stress
Above the complications of our situation
But I promise that isn't everything

I know I'm silent and
I'm aware that I'm a challenge for you to read
But if my word means anything
I want nothing more than to connect with you intellectually
To be able to talk for hours on end
To be open entirely and unapologetically
But I'm also petrified

You're smart beyond reasoning
And absolutely gorgeous
Hearing you laugh makes my heart race
And when our hands touch the beat stops entirely

I need to let go of this fear
The fear of rejection
The fear of this new experience
The fear of getting too attached
And the fear of the unknown

When I'm with you I feel on edge
But I also feel happier than I'm used to
I suppose that I'm afraid
That if I let you see me
The real human behind this tough exterior
That you'll change your mind
Which is fine because you'll do what's best for you
But the idea is still unnerving

I can't tell you when it'll change
But I promise it won't be like this forever
I'm trying to let go of this fear and anxiety
So that something real can actually come
From this mess we found ourselves in
Please be patient with me
Because even though I'm pretty ****** up
I have genuine feelings for you
And want a chance to prove that