It feels like I'm barely surviving...
I'm crawling on the floor trying to keep going.
Just when I think I can lay on the ground &rest..
I get buried alive.
I tell myself its ok, don't panic.
They warned you this would happen.
And I claw my way out of the dirt.
Again & again it happens.
The darkness & heaviness covers me so often.
That I wonder when will be the time that I will just lay there buried alive, close my eyes and let the air finally leave my body.
I don't know how much fight I have left in me.
How much can one person take?
I keep clawing my way up to the light.
But the darkness feels so much easier to lay in.
It won't be like this forever I tell myself.
One day you will get up and run joyfully where you want to go.
Hold on a little longer... don't let go.
This isn't the end.