he had the stage and a storied life
he was the thing
was the next coming a large head, too

Pride had this sister
she was fine as all ****
a butterbean ****

a face that would make
a cynic positively smile
dimpled and everything

but their mom
she was like
the Yeti Tall Foreboding
hairy

much like my eventual
Mother-in-law
and we all hung out
at keggers

in the back four and a half
acres
on Friday nights
and holidays

Pride had, this night,
a belly too full
a rip roaring thought
of swimming across the
Clinton River

it might have been a bet
a challenge from Little Roger
the troublemaker
that made Pride jump in

Or  his  big head that made
him sink right to the bottom
no problem he was only knee
deep and we rescued him

took three of us drunk fools
but we got him to the bank
and his sister all cute
in cutoff shorts so tight

said should'a let his *** drown
all i could see was her ******* her words seemed
to come from some realm
of make believe

anyways we all floated down that river
the next day on innertubes
except Little Roger
he had walked away

disappointed Pride was rescued
into a blackberry patch in the dark
and gotten bit
by a cottonmouth

I always have since wondered why
Mrs. Hairy McBoom took it so hard.