I tried to be the hero
Just for the sake of praise and purpose
I tried.
I said the right things and stood on my platform with pride.
That fall, that fear, the days, weeks, months, roll by.
I am nothing.
Nothing but a rat digging its nest in the walls of a home because he doesn't have his own.
Who am I now?
I am no one.
I am the ******* of an otherwise loving God.
I am the blizzard before spring.
I am the frostbite that only causes pain.
The end to the flowers, grass, and trees.
I am death.
At least I thought I was.
But I've begged for death since that April day and she won't come.
She won't come to visit and she won't come to stay.
That's why death is like my best friends.
Here for the funeral and gone the next day.
I plead for this to be a dream.
I've been afraid to make it.
And I have been afraid to be alone.
No I am not a rat, nor death, nor a hero.
I am a coward.