There was a young lad, whose name was Ben,
And he had the worst gas of all of his friends,
Every time he’d cut the cheese,
He’d bring them pleading to their knees.

“Please Ben, be a friend, and go seek some help,
For your gas is so potent that even the skunks yelp!”

Well Ben sat and thought for a second,
I’ll just break wind into a jar he reckoned.
Ill twist off the lid and plug up my ***,
And fill the jar with my putrid gas.

For weeks and weeks he collected his farts,
Til the air inside the jar was thick and dark.
He placed the old jar on top of his shelf,
I’ll get rid of you tomorrow, he said to himself.

Well something happened that night, and Ben’s life was taken,
When a violent storm left the whole house shaken.
The jar that Ben placed on his shelf with such care,
Had fallen, releasing his gas into the air.

Ben proceeded to suffocate slowly but steadily,
A victim of a crime that was silent but deadly.