I love you
and I'm sorry for everything I said.
there were voices all around me,
telling me that you shouldn't be
with someone like me
and, for some reason,
I believed them.

I love you
and I know this is just another voicemail
sent to your phone
that there's the chance
you'll see my number
and decide to just delete it away.

I love you
and I'm sorry
for all of the stress I caused you.
maybe those people were right
when they said I didn't deserve you.
a soul so kind and precious
to this world,
I would only dull your shine.
I would begin to poison you
with every word that came out of my mouth
even when it was the honest truth
about how you make me feel.

I love you
and I'm sorry
for being the reason
that you don't trust others anymore.
I'm sorry
for all the times
I reached out to touch you
and the poison
would spread through
my fingertips
making its way to your heart of gold.

I love you
and I know I haven't stopped calling you,
but maybe if you answered the phone,
we could talk this through.
if you don't want to talk to me,
I understand.

I love you
and days have passed
and I've realized that I poisoned you.
I'm sorry I didn't warn you
ahead of time
that my heart has been blackened
for far too long.
too black to be changed
and I only know how to hurt others
to keep myself from getting hurt.

I love you
and I'm sorry.
I don't know how many times
I have to say it,
but I'm sorry.
I'm sorry,
I'm sorry,
I'm so so sorry,
I'm sorry.

I love you
and I'm sorry for breaking your heart.
it was never my intention,
but my body's defense doesn't
know any other way.
I've been broken one too many times
that my brain acts for my heart instead.
my brain acts out
and destroys whatever is closest to me
and that just happened to be you.
what I didn't realize
was that I was breaking my own heart
when I broke yours.

I'm sorry
and I love you.