Have you ever thought about the last time you loved someone?
The last time you let someone in so far that
you found parts of yourself that you never knew?
The last time you promised yourself this was it
that she would be the one this time, like he was the one last time
and she was the one the time before that.

How this time, things were going to be different
and each time they are but you’re not sure
if it is for better or for worse but
you keep trying anyways because what is life if not
failed attempts and unfulfilled dreams?

Empty promises and countless nightmares
which have turned into daydreams because
you’re living them out in front of your own eyes
day after day without even realizing it.

Because here your are once again, with your heart out on your sleeve
letting her take pieces of it that you don’t even have to offer
because you’ve been split into smaller pieces but you still
give up what little you have because you were taught that
even when you have nothing, there is always something to give.

She has given me solace, warmth, kisses, and sweet smiles
that I worry I will never be able to repay because she can’t seem to find
the beauty that is inside of her, so what if she can never see
the beauty that I’ve been trying so hard to find within me?

These are the things that keep me unsure of my sureness
that keep me aware of the fact that I am now self aware
because I know that I deserve love and if she can’t accept mine
will she be able to love me?  

Was this too soon? Is she sure of me? Does she see the monster?
Does she see the true me? Have I let her so far inside that
she decided to turn back because she sees the darkness that
haunts my mind and clouds my heart but when she is around
I feel nothing but an electric heat that could light cities around the world.

Still, I keep fighting for her because I don’t know if I could even
bear the thought of losing her even now.  
My mission; my goal - love her in a way that she has never known before.
Love her in the way that she truly deserves because no one else
will ever be able to do it right; no one but me.
So here I stay, to hold her through the night and hopefully she
will finally see that she is the fire that illuminates my life.