It's vacuous of me to let go of something that might be real, you may say,
And don't you worry for it's the same that I feel.
There's a reason that even I, don't know,
but maybe, just maybe it's pessimism that I show.
I know it won't be enough but sorry I didn't let you in,
I was afraid to break the wall that took me time to build.
When's the time this fear finally goes away, I do not know,
And as I walk through this moonlit meadow, all I think about is you, that I shan't.
The thought of you won't go away, your face, your smile, your eyes that speaks,
I might be foolish to let it all be just a mere memory, but it's way better than to be used to it and get my own heart wrecked in the end.
Should I give it a try, I ask myself,
No not again I tell myself as I watch the vision of you fade away,
Tears racing down my cheeks, wanting to run to you and run away at the same time, yes I am a paradox.
I want to be happy but no because I'd be afraid of sadness once again,
sadness that I learned to embrace, sadness that almost felt like contentment.
You are my past that were never my future,
You're just another chance that I missed,
You're a risk I didn't take,
You're the vigor that were almost seeping in every part of me,
but now I am all drained.
You're something that's too good to be true.
You could be mine, but I messed up,
and we know for a fact I did it on purpose.
'Tis all the unsaid feelings I converted into poetry,
Breaking my heart into million pieces as I write every word.
You're the happiness I've been longing for but I've let go,
Good bye, I don't deserve you, till we meet again.