I don't even know how to articulate
this type of pain
It's a pain that not only floods my
heart
but latches itself onto every quivering bone
in my body
Perhaps it's not pain, maybe it's love
Love that disguises itself as pain every time I look at my family
and realize
for the first time in all these years
that that same people who told me they want what's best for me,
break me down into a million pieces
until I lose myself
again and again
Only to come crawling back
so they can find me
But it's funny, because the girl they keep finding,
**isn't me