I've been having nightmares about you again
you know the ones, where I wake up
Screaming and shaking
hairs raised like there were spiders on my skin
insects, bugs, those four-legged thoughts of you
holding me against you whispering
love love love
how sweet, how blissful, such tenderness

lie

you grab my head thats cradled against you
in your hands that dwarf my own
twist, snap
That is how you have loved me
that is how you have left me
I awaken, soaked in sweat and tears
I sob into pillows that still smell of you

spiders

Are they still just dreams if I cannot escape them?
Do nightmares follow you into the waking world?
When you dream, are there spiders?
Did you ever really love me?

**Have I ever woken up?