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Jul 2015
I once knew my father so well
He fought back tears as we spoke of Heaven and Hell
He watched me swim in the backyard in a kitty pool
I thought he was great and sometimes, even cool
I love my father
I lost my dad some years ago
Not to death, only to alcohol and sorrow
I'm not sure who he is now
I know only that it is not likely he will return
I love my father
He showed me what it's like to really live life on this Earth
No material things really mattered
Only love, friendship, and family, until it all shattered
I see the glossy-ness of your eyes as you pop the tab of another beer
It all grew from the root of fear
You didn't mean to lose it all
Only to have a great climb before the fall
I love you, father
My dad taught me patience
Picking him up out of a bathtub, my fear latent
Anger prevails
Arms flail
A relationship so frail
The seams busted, and I screamed and shouted
You never doubted me
I love you, father
I've forgiven you too many times to count
I never showed resentment, only annoyance
I admit, not dismiss
I broke boundaries and treated you with disrespect
You don't deserve it when you're at your best
But that still leaves all the rest
I love my father
I'm angry, but not blindly so
I give my all for him only to dispose
My dad's a drunk
But I've come to accept
I know he loves me, so that's all I'll continue to expect
I love you, father
Brittany Ryan
Written by
Brittany Ryan  United States
(United States)   
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