you can’t feel regret with a bullet through your head
you can’t wake up to the smell of stale *****
or see FAILURE printed on your forehead in the mirror
or hear your own thoughts that seem to be in such greater quantities than everyone else’s

it’s the best solution for a hangover
the cure for the worst headaches
an end to all thoughts that seem to be in direct contact with whatever makes your stomach twist
            your chest tighten
            your palms sweat
            your eyes well up

the list of pros and cons is dramatically lopsided
force yourself not to think of the look in her eyes when she sees you every other weekend
block out the sound of their laughter when it’s 3am and no one can sleep
put blinders on: see tomorrow
                          see the day after
                          see disappointment and regret and broken bottles
                          because sometimes you stumble

only then will you be able to give yourself the right answer
when you ask, “would that be so hard to walk away from?”