Everything that happens to me feels distant now.Like I'm having an out of body experience Where I'm standing 20 feet away from myself and no matter how hard I run the distance stays the same. I am emotionless. Cold. A palette of blacks and greys. Nothing feels the same. I remember the night you told me she was dying. I remember the way my heart stopped beating. How it hasn't beat since. Everyday is a game of Russian roulette but instead of the gun aimed at an opponent its aimed at me.
Click.
You know that saying
Click.
That you never realize what you have
Click.  
Until its gone
Click.
I've finally figured it out
Bang.