Some nights you just have to spend alone with your thoughts.
Breathing them in and out.
Feeling them all come, and feeling them all go.
Sometimes it’s the easiest thing to do, and sometimes it’s the hardest.

Tonight it’s hard.
Tonight I can’t get you out of my mind.
Tonight I want to scream and hold my breath so long that your feeling will never leave me.
I know once I exhale, you will leave my body,
and slowly, I will forget what you felt like.

As each breath gets more pure, you will be washed away in the little air particles that float around my room.
You will make your way out of the door, and into the streets where you will fill the night sky with your wonder.
I will fall asleep in sadness just hoping,
that maybe when I wake up tomorrow,
I will step outside and the wind will have brought you back to me.

Maybe you will find a nice corner to wait,
and then one day, without me noticing,
You will re-enter my soul and I will feel life again.

I can only hope that as the time passes in between,
I grow numb to feeling the pain that this emptiness has caused.
So that I can feel like you never left me at all.
So that when I do breathe you in again, we can forget about the hurt and the pain that led me to walk away.
So that we can be in eternal bliss.
So that I never have to hold my breath again to try and keep you.
So that we can breathe the same air.
So that you can hold me and whisper sweet nothings into my ear.
I will be basking in your breath, in a sea of you.

I don’t even know how to swim,
but I’m not afraid of drowning.