i was born in fire.
i can not deny the heat in my veins.
but i am not ashamed
that every morning
i swallow the sun
so that the moon
can keep pulling
back the tide
and i let the fog
cover the sunrise
i drench myself in night
because i am left
not right.
cold water comforts my soul
the depth keeps me afloat
there is something beautiful
about a black-colored sea
but as fireborn as i am
there is no ounce of love
for the fire in me.

Okay no
You're not obligated to think of me
But it still hurts when you don't

It was 11:45 P.M. exactly
There was no more time
For any outrageous foolery.

You had to bring her home
By 12:00 no later and already
You had fifteen minutes to spare.

You stopped the car and sat
For a minute to listen
To her steady breathing.

She waits for you to say something
But you only look ahead
And listen to her breathing.

"Are you alright?" She asks you
And you reply with a smile
But to answer––it takes a while.

Maybe you don't want to admit it
But you're not alright.
Not alright with anything at all.

Not alright with the fact she's
Still with you right here
Right at this spot at this time.

Or maybe not with the fact
That her parents actually like you
And that her brother trusts you.

Does it scare you? Of course.
Do you want to believe it's real?
Of course. No gold ever mounted up.

But something still terrifies you,
Chills you to the cores of your bones
And makes your innards quiver.

Especially your heart.

But that's besides the point.
You had an imaginary woman
Stuck inside your head for years.

You're ashamed to say
You wouldn't let her out
Even though it's been so long.

She's banging at your forehead
Right now as you listen
To the other woman's breathing.

She wants out.
But you won't let her out.
She will stay with you.

No––she won't. Want to know why?
Because there's a better woman
Sitting right next to you.

She's beautiful, you know that's a fact.
She's sassy, you know that's a fact.
And you definitely know she's sweet.

So why is this other woman
The one stuck in your head
Still banging away? Trying to escape?

You know it's because you're scared.
The woman next to you? She's real.
You can touch her––she's real.

You're scared of real, aren't you?
You're scared that since she's real
She'll drag along heartbreak.

You're scared because you depend
On the woman inside your head
Far too much to be healthy.

She's fake. She won't ever hug you
Or kiss you or cuddle you or love you
She won't cry or laugh with you.

Why doesn't the imaginary scare you?
Is it because she can't ever leave you?
Is it because she's perfect?

No––obviously not.
You're not perfect,
So she's definitely not perfect.

So again, you ask yourself,
Why doesn't the imaginary scare you?
And why doesn't the real satisfy you?

It's bizarre, yes. You know that.
But seeing the woman next to you
Smile and touch your cheek,

It's terrifying.

Maybe you should leave
Maybe you should go
Hole yourself up in your room
And spend hours with the
Woman inside your head.
Maybe you should run
Before she can catch you,

Maybe––

"I love you." She suddenly says.
And you blink.
What did she say? I love you? To you?

"Why?" You ask with a cracked voice.
You don't deserve this.
You've been thinking about another woman.

"There are many things,
But I want you to know I do.
I really really love you."

She loves you?
Truly?

"Yes." She starts laughing because
Apparently you thought out loud.
You break into a smile at the sound.

She grabs your face and pulls you close.
"I love you. I love you. I love you."
And you start crying.

Because you can hear
The genuity in her voice
Clear as a sunny day.

And also,
It's now 12:01 A.M.

from my mouth
grows a sunflower
with every breath
from my lungs
a vine entwines
itself around
my ears
and i can hear
the whisper
of all my fears
i lay in a bed of roses
silent broken and still
time is an icy wilderness
surrounding me
as my tears
fall frozen
to the ground
and the sunflower
bends it's head
into my darkness
and dwells there
instead.

hello poetry is quite inactive lately. where are all my fellow poets gone?

you are lovely
lovely for struggling
against a world who hates you
lovely for fighting
even when you're on your knees
lovely for walking a dark path
even though it costs your innocence
lovely for enduring
the cruel whips of your self-hatred
for you know no enemy
as wicked as yourself
but you are lovely
a glowing blue haze of victory
for you crawled all this way
through black ashen rain
through rampants of pursuers
through torrid heat and anger
to see the light and now
you can bask in the sun

you are lovely for enduring.

i want to stop loving you
the way i wish i could love myself

as wild as this ocean beneath my feet
as wild as these waves that calm me
as wild as this flower near the road
as wild as these hands that only hold
as wild as the sky way up above
as wild as these mourning doves
as wild as the wind from out the sea
as wild as the whispers calling me
as wild as this cherry blossom blooms
as wild as this duskblue moon
as wild as the wild spring in May
as wild as the heat from summer days
as wild as a frost during winter nights
as wild as these mountainous heights
as wild as the love in this heartbeat
everyone,
let us be.

hold me back,

       please, hold me back

           otherwise

                 my fingers

  my voice,

my eyes,

my words


will tell the world
of my love for you.

with every step you took
it was a little farther away
each time you took a step
it was far away from me

i am young, i won't lie
responsibility hasn't quite kicked in yet.
my eyes are still wide and naive
but at least they're a little more open than before.
i am young, i won't lie
but i grow up a little faster each second
as the world delves into chaos.
it's a strange thing to yearn for adulthood
when i don't want to lose my youth.
i am young, i won't lie
halfway to thirty
quarterway to sixty.
i am young.
but
i'm not quite sure
i want to inherit
the earth yet.

if only he knew
that every time
i look at him
i see a galaxy
a galaxy
too far
away
from
me.

my choking words suffocated me
a hangman's rope around my neck.
their eyes were sunlit fires, staring at me
judgement and damnation aflame.
I cursed them, I cursed myself,
but again my words suffocated me.
I cried silent on the bathroom floor
in a heap of broken dignity.

I used to cut out my tongue
so I couldn't tell anyone my secrets
and I cut off my ears so that
I couldn't hear myself scream it.
I would lay on the floor, ignoring
ignoring the blood that poured
from my eyes–my mouth
from my ears and my heart.

I thought myself a single crack
a single crack in a castle made of glass
a mistake in perfection made
a stormy day, a moment ignored.
I groaned at my reflection
and an empty soul stared back.
I rained a world's worth of water
no sunshine came and no flowers bloomed.

but you saw me and embraced me
you danced in my rain and I saw
how beautiful you danced in me.
you learned sign language for me
and taught me how to speak again
and washed away my blood.
you made my ugliness beautiful
and I found I loved my beautiful.

let me swim away
              let me dive into the ocean
and leave the world of humans
              to dwell with the creatures
that lie underneath the surface
               let me run away
let my feet turn into fins
               so that i can race the dolphins
the water is bluer than the sky
               i've always wondered if
ocean creatures want to fly
               let me lungs breathe water
and let my freedom become the sea
               let my freedom become the sea
let me swim away
               let me swim away
let me breathe the water
               let me breathe the water
and race the dolphins

the soul of this city
        calls me like no other


the lights shine across
         a beacon i long to see


this city has my heartstrings
        tied like thread to its core


i want to see my ancestors
         that traveled that land before


the soul of this city
       calls like a song to my being


but more than seoul would I like to see
in korea itself is where i'd like to be