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614 · Mar 2016
Looks Decieve
Payton Catalino Mar 2016
My eyes didn’t become blue on their own.
You wouldn’t think they were quite as pretty
If you’ve seen every single thing they know.
Yes, my blue eyes have seen the greatest days,
but they have also seen blood and way too many graves.
My eyes are often glossy, like glass that may shatter
You think they look like ice, is appearance all that matters?
My eyes have seen true love, my eyes have seen you at your best
But have you looked deeply into them, can you see the memory of death?
My eyes are like an ocean, hypnotically blue and alluring,
but don’t let their appearance deceive you- for there may be demons lurking
441 · Apr 2016
No Strings Attached
Payton Catalino Apr 2016
“So what are we?” He asked with a smile.

I felt my heart drop out of my chest.
I realized that our innocent fun
Has turned into something deeper,
Something with more meaning.

“You tell me,” I murmured playfully.

With my heart pounding and thoughts racing,
I was taken over by complete happiness.
I realized my love for him about three months ago,
He must have finally realized he feels the same way.
We were both ready to take our relationship to the next step.
As I waited for his answer, his lips curved upward, his eyes sparkled.
I was so happy to not have to be his little secret anymore,
To be able to tell my best friends about our late nights together,
About the way his hands cradle my body while we share sweet words,
To tell them in detail about every memory we have lived.

The next few words that escaped his mouth seemed to hang in the air,
Then proceeded to slip through my ears, slide down my throat
And strangle my lungs, leaving me gasping in despair.
My heart exploded on the scene.
Yes, I could here my heartstrings tearing, one by one.

And Three weeks from hearing those words I’m still picking shards of glass from my lungs,
Coughing blood up every night while shaking on the bathroom floor,
Attempting to piece my broken heart back together and find myself repaired.

“No strings attached?” He said.
A short memoir I captured with words.  If you may relate, then please remember that an unrequited love is not worth your pain.
361 · Mar 2016
Lone Girl
Payton Catalino Mar 2016
Below me the snow crunches
Once untouched, pure, beautiful, clean
because of me can no longer gleam
I am the lone girl
The one your parents warned you about
Warned you to stay away
once loved so strongly,
now just a stray

I am the lone girl,
looking up into the beauty of the moon
with each night i spend alone with Luna,
my heart projects a broken tune
the shrieks of a lone wolf
pierces my ears
and sadly i know inside
the reason for the wolves musical tears

the wolf is in love with the moon,
his prized treasure, the apple of his eye
his wish to be closer will never come true
that’s why at night you hear his cries
the wolf and i are alike,
inside we both know enough
that our eyes will never be dried
because of a love we will never touch
225 · Mar 2016
Love, What's it good for?
Payton Catalino Mar 2016
I think sometimes love can be so powerful
That we have to become numb to it
Because if we let it consume us
It might just **** us

The day I fell in love with you
Is the day I lost myself
I lost my sanity, I put my heart on a shelf
For you to take all for yourself
Your happiness replaced my own mental health

Now you’re gone, and I don’t know how to live
Maybe that’s why the rain suddenly feels colder on my skin
Maybe that’s why I pushed away all of my family and my friends
I just, I don’t know where to begin or where to end
You came in and you saved me, then you left and I’m broken again

I’ve been picking shattered glass out of my lungs for weeks,
Because when you told me you lost your love for me,
My heart exploded on scene
Your name burns my throat more than Hennessy
I want to get drunk from the whiskey on your breath,
But the only thing that I taste is stale Bacardi

I stopped looking both ways when crossing the street
I don’t care if I meet my daily needs
I am drowning in my tears, my scars plain to see
But no matter what I do
I can’t destroy myself more than you have destroyed me

My love for you is too strong,
Without you I don’t think I can go on
I hear you in every sad song
I see you everywhere, even though I haven’t seen you in so long
I need to know where I went wrong
I’m sorry, I’m so sorry but you took away my sun

If I let you consume me,
Anymore than you already have consumed my life
Then I will have to start giving out goodbyes,
Because without you, I might just die

— The End —