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nicoarty Aug 2015
That is it then
The deal is signed
Everything, is in my mind
I watch past blurs
Doubled sight
What she said I fear is right

There's nothing wrong with me
Is what she said
Nothing wrong but what's in my head
But I can't think that
I can't see
Past the things I know to be me

For her it's not real
I guess it's easy to judge
But for me I can feel it - my own personal grudge
Against myself
My awkwardness
My fear of not being me
Saying things wrong whenever I speak

So tell me I don't tremble
Or take half an hour to reply
Tell me again how it's all in my mind

And if it is in my mind
No physicality in the mix
How could it be something
Real doctors can fix
Am I a monster?
Is something wrong in my head?!
"The problem is; You think that"
Is all that she said.
Doctor, sister, mother, friend,
Lover, brother, until the end
Is this what you see?
Is this what you say?
If so I don't think it's best that I stay.
nicoarty Aug 2015
Stars above hold on to me tight,
Hold me together when I cannot fight,
Because only you in this universe so huge,
Will stay firmly by me when life gets so crude,

When I'm not creating, not talking,
All the moments when i have no worth,
And the vastness of thought consumes me,
As I ponder my reason of birth,

When I feel emptiest, I look up to you,
Cause only the universe, knows what to do,
As I lay down my pain, raw in your eyes,
And think of the stars;
All the stars in the skies

How even in the emptiness, far away, there is light,
So when my mind is like space, I make my stars shine bright

So my dear stars, hold onto me tight,
For with out you I'm lost in never ending night,
Without you I'm gone, I can't find my worth,
Without you dear stars; I'd undo my birth.
nicoarty Aug 2015
Moonlight flit across her skin
Caress every Cherub's dream
As her deft lily pad footsteps
Tap to-and-fro along the stream

Bells chime in hollow sounds
My Angel's laughter gleams
She drifts along One two, One two
Enchanting all my dreams

O' my Lady, Lover's light
Take my hand I plead
She gazed into my eyes at last
With glass-eyed misery

Where hence she went from the stroke of twelve
Never shalt I know
As I watched the Fae dance her to
Withered skin and crumbled bone

Now blooded footprints ring my hall
But never shall I leave
My darling angel dances still
In the rustling of the leaves.
In another possibility the word "ring" in the last stanza could be exchanged for "throne" if you prefer the sound it gives to the poem.
nicoarty Aug 2015
When you think of me, what is it you see?
Do you see the ghost, the smiles or the scars?
Do you see the tears, the broken halves?
Or do you see, What the mirror shows?
Do you see beyond your nose?

Is it the light that catches your eye?
Or is it all that we can't deny
What is it dear, what do you see?
Nothing she said- Thinking of me.
nicoarty Aug 2015
Few droplets, dripping, trickling
Up the edge
Drained dry
As the bones below
My withered skin and mind
Fire in my skull, on my tongue
Look down
Through nothing
Clear stinging
Drowning despair, Growing want

If only there were two empty
Not one
So little
Passion gone
Not enough, need another, stronger, stronger, go on
Few droplets, dripping, trickling,
For my mind I dredge
Just enough
To keep me going
To take me to the edge

To the place of troubles
Where I'll burn away my woes
Not enough to lose myself
Just to let me go.
  Aug 2015 nicoarty
Mel Little
I am nothing.
Full of empty hope, stolen kisses, unfulfilled dreams
Full of starlight and sunshine
But really, full of last night's ***** and wasted promise.
I am nothing. Pouring tears, wastoid of God's creation
Covered in bruises and scars and tattoos and sweat and contempt from onlookers
I am nothing. Nothingness in its truest form, the lack of soul, the lack of feeling.
Call me Robot.
Call me Wasteling
Call me Loser
Call me Ugly.
Just ******* call me.
For I am nothing,
        Without you.
nicoarty Aug 2015
It is unbearable
To see a loved one in pain
To watch their eyes prickle
See their tears stain

But is it not worse
To be unable to help
When one you love hurts
But your love is not felt

As you are not who they want
To them you do not exist
And you have to watch others
Be their everything

As you have to be happy
At your own despair
For you hate when they feel pain
Even more so that you could not be there.
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