I'm dizzy
trace you onto me

you twist with my emotions
I'm innocent
you noticed

I'm quiet
you realize

I'm shy
I'm not naive

you don't know that

give me the bottle
giggles tangled in the loud music
my body feels lucid

you have a liar's love
I found myself
dizzy in your hands

I lost myself in your eyes
I'm still trying to come back

I don't trust you one bit
still
I want your touch

agree to disagree

I'm now a nocturnal animal
don't ask me how
I will teach myself to love dawn

study the moon and sun close together
just for a short while

all good things are temporary

cold and lonely
somebody hold me

restless again
I see no sleep today
maybe tomorrow

You created a beautiful world
a flawless nature
a flawless earth

You created creatures full of mistakes
you created painful beings

I'm envious of the light
you created so ethereal

why am I not beautiful
like the ocean

you created such a perfect ground
humans tear apart

I'm disappointed you let such a celestial planet
go to waste

oh how the memories
become endless
everyday I wake up
dreaming of someone I have lost

it kills me to think
I will never see you again

I lost you once
I hate to lose you again

I promise you
you are beautiful
believe it

how I miss the ocean
how I do I live knowing I can't go back
the best days are always the shortest

let me see you smile one more time
I forgot what's it like to love you
I miss the way you loved me back

just like that
I crumble down
longing
reminiscing
melancholic
eating myself up
till I'm small

deja todo
encima de mi

cargo todo el peso por ti

cuando quieres
cuando no
me voy a ir

deja me dormir
no tengo porque vivir así

espero ver el fin
te quiero dejar ir

te quiero
te quiero

estoy cansada
el sacrificio lo voy hacer

I wonder if you're awake
footsteps
or miles away

I wish to capture your gaze
I want to visit your dreams

I hope somewhere
you're thinking of me

let me not think about tomorrow
I'm restless
I'm tired of all the things I never do

times I only think of you
I count the smallest stars
I fall in and out of love

I never thought I'd find someone more beautiful than the night sky

I don't see it happening
in this lifetime

standing under a sea of stars
I want to stay there forever in the dark

I wish I was a star
living
shining
only in the night sky

so you can only see me
when the sun falls

I'm myself when
everyone is asleep

this is who I want to be
someday

some of us
are tired of sacrifices
everyday
sorry
please don't be mad
I'm close to crying
some of us
hate everyday
sorry
I hate this game
you always win
I can't find a way out
I can't sleep
some of us
don't want to be here
where do we go
sorry
I'm irresponsible
I don't manage my emotions well
some of us
try our very best
our best isn't close to enough
I'm so behind everyone
sorry
I won't ever catch up

It doesn't matter when I push myself into the darkness

It hurts the most when you're the one to push me

you hurt me in many ways
reflect all your anger on me
I was convinced it wasn't my fault

the damage is done
you planted the idea
my head soaks it up

you push me into the dark
hurts a billion times more
than
pushing myself

the clouds look strange
are they real
am I dreaming

It hurts a little
going inside the dark for a while
I can see the moon outside now

everyone sleep
eyes closed
let me fall apart

I want to be holy again
always going back to it
I want to fade slowly
holding myself back

I don't know how

feeling manic
everything is spinning

I saw my mask fall down

everyone is sleeping
stillness

it's cold now
hurts a little

cover my eyes
I don't want to see myself

I didn't mean it seriously
If I die
remember
remember

ninety something, one hundred ways, torture comes in waves
you write little boxes, small words, open lines I don't understand
you talk about nothing, you write about lost places, frightened faces this isn't okay I'll remember this next time I find you again
waiting in line times I tried I didn't lie I said everything is fine
in my head it is I keep going down to the dark side I hope you care
one day I'll talk about it, ninety something, a thousand ways, silence is felt indifferent messing with my head bad dreams I won't wake up
it's cold the sounds are gone I feel numb living all alone

I kissed my ears to sleep
I can hear the faint fall of rain
somewhere in my head

I like to talk about the moon
he's somewhere behind the thick clouds

If only I was a cloud
somewhere in his sky

can't you see me
I can make it rain down

I can make the wind talk
can't you hear it

I wear the night
swallow the daylight

lead the way
the moon is rising

a billion girls love him
a billion boys stare

the moon keeps to himself

I invite the cold inside my room
this november rain
missing you hurts

come into my world
let's stay in wonderland

my hands are falling off
I can't hear the sound
thinking about you is the worst

leaving first
you won't stay
loving you hurts

todas las mujeres
somos flores

cuidado
despertamos

caídas
nos levantamos

abierta
es
abierta

todos me entierran

bonita
muy encantadora

pero

las flores

se secan

y todos me dejan

I can write a million poems
I can use a billion words
all from different languages

I can write you a story
I can tell you a lie
I can show you the truth

these 36,000 words
mean nothing
nothing
nothing

If I can't you tell you
nothing
nothing
nothing

I promise
nothing

I'll write about
nothing

I talk of
nothing

I am a poet
I prepare myself
to feel nothing
when the last line is written

all 36,000 words
meant something

I hope you forgive me for all the things I never do
I hope you forgive me for all I never say

I hope you're not hopeful
I can't change
I wait
I wait

maybe I'll give up the day I forgive myself
for all this pain

thank you
for never understanding

thank you
for never listening

thank you
for never paying attention

I fell part in front of you
not once did you catch me

I hope you forgive me
for not telling you better

I blame myself for not being better

you won't change
I waited
I wait

maybe one day
we can be hopeful for better things

cold feet
selling cars
plates of food I'll never eat

I wish we were friends
I wish we were friends
I wish we were friends

wake up wake up
you don't know me
I try and grow up
but I often dream you know my name

I wish we were friends
we could drive out to the city
you could feed me all the things you love
I could wait for you in the mornings and night

I'm trying to grow up
I'm trying not to hurt myself
but I will if I have to

I know I'm being lied to
I don't want to fight it
but I have to

I wish we were friends
I wish we were friends
I wish we were friends

waking up
another day
you don't know of my existence

can't get a break
from all the things I hate

ᴵᶠ ᴵ ᵈiˢᵃᵖᵖᵉᵃʳ
ʸᵒᵘ ᵈᵒⁿ'ᵗ ᵏⁿᵒʷ ʷʰᵉʳᵉ ᵗᵒ ᶠiⁿᵈ ᵐᵉ

I miss your silly gifts

you didn't make my heart race

I wasn't running away

you're not good enough for me

I miss the way you do nothing to me

your voice runs loud

I'll let you in now

you found life

I'm living a strange way

I want to be friends

you won't admit it

we won't talk again

we won't meet again

we won't

you take me back
you remind me of all the good feelings

I feel frustrated
I'm so sick of this weather

I wish I could call you at midnight
the magical hour when my heart opens
I'd spill out my secrets I'd tell you everything you don't know

I'm giving up
I'm letting go
I'm holding on
I'm off and on

I've been feeling like a lost cause
please stay up
I need to see your voice

my biggest mistake
is being kind to everyone
but myself

He's a man without apologies
he's testing my patience
my sanity
he's a man without feelings
I followed him till I fell apart

I lose myself without him
learning ways to love myself
in ways he could not

he calls me bonita
he doesn't remember the new me
I danced around him like a doll

He's a man without love
I battle all the cruel deities
his name escapes out unknown tongues

He's a man without words
he doesn't have a conscious
old god
I let him push me to the side

He's a lonely man
somedays I hope he comes back
I hope he takes me back

another day
I am reminded
you don't care about me

another day
I wonder why me
when will you disappear

another day
another day
I hope these days go away

another day
waiting for this to end

look
how sad
how sad

you broke my heart

you don't have one
you can't love me back

I wander alone at night
looking for a heart

look
how foolish I am

you break my heart

you want the pieces to yourself

everyone is laughing at me

out loud
inside their heads

everywhere I go
I see the look in their eyes

I'm pathetic
I know

Alone
behind doors

I stay away

I never hurt others
I only hurt myself

everyone is watching me
everyone is talking about me

I'm a disappointment
I'm not what they expected

I'm not who they want me to be

I hope
we connect

I hope the stars and planets align

I hope we understand

I hope we live

I hope we die

I hope we end

I hope we try again

I hope we aren't so hopeful

nunca
siempre eres nada

habla
no te quiero ver

eres nada

tal vez

un día

siempre
callados

siempre
eres nada

te necesito
no te quiero ver

no me hables

drawing lines on my arms
these won't leave scars

autumn
it's time to hide under long sleeves

I use a permanent red marker
hoping no one takes a peek

I soak up the ink
waiting for my skin to dry

I know how to hide
I let them underestimate me

I let them control me
so I can learn the way

sometimes I have more power
than them
doing what they say

don't underestimate my lies
the bigger the line
I feel fine

eres del cielo
vivo en las nubes
la luna nos habla en la noche
no te entiendo piensas en el sol
no conozco tus sentimientos
quiero ver todos tus pensamientos

late nights
I hear the train call
I wonder what's it like to fall

I imagine myself running far
I never make the first step outside
the world will **** me if I hide I can survive

I've lost my right ear
I hate opening my eyes
this is me is this forever

I'm desperate
I'm changing again
I want to say everything
I speak nothing when I try

I hate the daylight
I wish to live inside the dark
I'm alive in the pitch dark
where no one can find me

I let the wind sweep my unspoken words away

I hear the children laugh and play
I can't remember a day I was like them

I let the clouds hang heavy above me
rain somewhere my regrets can't touch me

I kept them close
we fell backwards
the closer I believed
further away we pushed ourselves

I taste the lost sleep on my lips
I carry my youth in a coin bag

the winter hides the pain
we fall with the autumn leaves
let the wind carry my being

I have thirty five thousand words stuck in my throat

everything
I can't say

no one ever listens

read me

god is always cruel
selfish
jealous
self centered
god is a man

the blood on my hands
I'll never be pure again

tell me again
please remind me
what I'm good for

I will delete you from my life
goodbye
so long

do I trust the words I say
are they fake
flowing out of my imagination

do my eyes see the truth
is this reality
or a dark confused dream

do my ears hear honestly
I can't hear the right way
I try and silence the waves

questioning my existence

is my body real

is my mind mine

do I waste my time

am I alive

it's never getting better
it's never getting better
it's never getting better
it's never getting better
it's never getting better

I live in a nightmare

don't tell me differently

I will change nothing of me

it's never getting better it's never getting better it's never getting better it's never getting better it's never getting better it's never getting better it's never getting better it's never getting better it's never getting better
it's never getting better it's never getting better

this is how I breathe

let me sink

I wake up to this nightmare

I know
I can't be better

can we play hide and seek
forget about everything
can we play
this game never ends
I'm so lonely
I see no stars
nothing to wish upon

I hoped
you'd learn how to play hide and seek