thunder*
I always thought we'd be together
You and I, we said forever..
In the rain I am standing
Why am I here?
This is bad planning
I see light flicker through a crack in the curtains
The curtains I bought for you when you first moved into to your place
I practiced every word I’m going to say to you
I’ve covered every trace
I'm at your door step
Too afraid to knock
My hearts sinks like a stone in my stomach
Feels like I swallowed a rock
I blink rain and tears from my eyes
I’m happy the storms raging so it muffled my delicate cries
I walked all the way here
Yeah, I still go on walks
My hair is soaked, cooling my fresh and steaming thoughts
Everything is pounding, I’m hoping this ends like a book
Cold and shaking
How dramatic do I look?
The thought of this makes me laugh
Someone walks by the door
I think you heard me
I want to run and hide, I don’t have confidence anymore
But this is my chance, it will all be okay
The front door opens and I have nothing to say

It's your three year old daughter
I hear a woman say *Lilah, close the door honey.
Oh, no.
She's beautiful
She has your eyes
Your lips
Your hair
Your giggle..
But not all of her is just like you
She has hints of her mother in her too
Her mother..
The luckiest woman alive.
Help
I'm frozen
Run, ******* it, run!
But I cant
I hear her high heels coming toward the door
Lilah, who are you looking at?
There's no one there
Her mother cant see me
There's no more rain
It's a hot summer night
But my clothes are still dripping
There's blood on my shirt around where the branch impaled me
Glass is embedded into my hands
Lilah is still looking up at me, smiling
She's beautiful
You join your wife at the door
Your eyes full of happiness
Your lips would no longer shape to mine
Your hair is short and you've been weathered by time
I always loved your beard
You grab your daughter's hand and pull her inside
I on my knees crying now, because she should have been mine
You should be mine
**** being mortal and **** time
The day I died was the day you proposed
You got on one knee, the ring tied to a thorn'd rose
Thorn'd roses are my favorite
They show how something so delicate will go to great lengths to protect itself
Just like my heart..
It was a rainy day
The roads were slick
You leaned over and kissed me while you were driving
We hydroplaned
I didn't put on my seat-belt
Too busy looking at my gorgeous ring from my gorgeous man
We hit a tree
I was launched through the windshield
The branch went straight through me
I didn't feel any pain
The last words I spoke were your name
I loved you.
Oh, God how loved you
I still love you, even in death
I'm at your door step
But you cant see me..

When all you want is just to think and make
But like a wheel in tar ambitions slow
Create your world all full of great mistakes

To be yourself when all the smiles seem fake
Can feel as if you’ve been punched in the nose
When all you want is just to think and make

****** onward for this life is yours to take
Please wait before you walk dark paths alone
Create your world all full of great mistakes

Though all of hope may freeze in frozen state
It’s still just one foot down, one up, to go
When all you want is just to think and make

There’s never so much as you think at stake
And errors which don’t **** will make you grow
Create your world all full of great mistakes

If nothing’s left to do for heaven’s sake
Eschew the past; it is your only foe
When all you want is just to think and make
Create your world all full of great mistakes

I'm lighting up a cigarette inhaling the suicidal taste of nicotine;
It helps me calm my mind while damaging me from within.
Thinking what to write today while keeping myself sane;
It's hard to escape madness knowing it is driving me insane.

So I took this pen inked with eternal damnation;
Which words to suffice the needs for desolation.
My thoughts run wild just by thinking of her;
It triggers something that makes my words clever.

And so from tragedy I'm writing about love and unity;
Blessed by the heavens and strengthen by the holy trinity.
That someday every one will realize that no darkness remains free;
For there is a moment that in the shadow comes a light that shines brightly.