Do you remember when we met?
We were at that amusement park I love so much.
At first it was a simple friendship
Occasional talk and text
Then I got to know you better
How we think alike and act
Suddenly after 3 years we're best friends.
Then I realized I had a crush
It was mutual.
I liked you but I couldn't decide how much
If I could kiss my best friend
If this would be something I want
But tonight I realized how I feel about you
Your eyes are like the ocean where I feel most at ease
I want to laugh and be stupid with you as always
But something new
I'm craving your kiss
Being with you is care free and happy
Your flirtatious nature once annoyed me
But now its so sweet
The tease by my friends that once hurt me
Cuz I'm taller than you and you're a little chubby
I don't mind your height and for reasons I cannot find i think your chub is kinda cute
So I'm done being unsure
Telling you we can't be together
Because Im realizing now that you're perfect for me and I'm oh so in love with you.

How about
we explore
and expose
the underbelly
of our drunken tongues

I want to fall in love
with your ugly
and
forget why
once morning has begun

I remember when I met you
you were different to all of her other many boyfriends
we could talk about the things I liked
you liked them too.

Months after you and her had finished your chapter in life
you stepped into mine
you dazzled dizzied bewildered me
showed me that it was alright to like the things I did

You wrote poems
you made me feel special
I thought that you liked me
the way I liked you

Then you left for what seemed a thousand years
the night I found out about your new girl I didn't cry
I remained content until an excessive amount of alcohol brought out all the feelings
the words spewed out of me
the same way the varied assortments of drink would do later that night

We still spoke on occasion
we shared an embrace or two when we accidentally met in the street
I was still crazy about you
even though I was aware that you were crazy about her

You ignore me now
we don't talk
you cast me aside
like everybody else did

I think of you a lot lately
but not in the way I used to
If I ever had the pleasure of speaking with you again
I would remain silent
I have nothing to say to you

The only things I have are the memories of you
the arguments
the embraces
the exams

It's all over now.

I understand that everything I thought we had was all in my imagination
when you said you loved me you didn't mean it in the way I did
but I can't be with anybody else because I feel as if it should be you
I'd like to say you ruined me but you didn't
I've ruined myself
I'm so used to being in a state of heart break that I will put myself back there in order to feel comfortable

I want to forget you
in the same way that you've forgotten me
thrown me away
left me

I hope you never find out how much I cared for you
because it's embarrassing for me
I can't believe I ever felt that way about anybody
I let somebody through the hard exterior that I have
I pretend I have no emotion but you made me vulnerable
I let you in.

i dare look into eyes,
into even those of glass.
i fear my soul whimpers
in the glimpse of a second.
iris: beauty taken
in from the soul;
it's full of suspended wonder.
i can't resist the pull
in those floral colors
ivy green, sky blue, dirt brown, midnight black.
infinite
itself.
i see every word,
in the white,
innumerable thought
in the black.
is reality captured in those sullen globes?
i may never know.

Love makes me a liar
A wordsmith of beautiful lies
I already feel comfortable in the presence of denial
Because love makes me believe it is nothing
Love makes me skeptical and hopeless
It leaves a string dangling over a bridge
And I’m stupid enough to actually reach for it
It leaves me in a different time zone
I’m wide awake while he’s fast asleep

Love makes me smile at the thought
But then surprises me in reality

I’ve only been in love twice in my life
The first time love let me see him
He did not know I existed
I was in the 6th grade when I fell
For the boy who thought he was so cool
And I was just the invisible yet visible doormat

The second was in high school
I fell in love with the boy December once knew
It was the first time I ever uttered that phrase
“I love you”
And like every love story tale
You’d think love would interfere
But this time love did not let that ink spill
Did not cover up this lovely time written
Love did not do anything wrong
Because it was me who ruined a perfectly good love song

Love makes me numb but cry over false desires
It makes me roll my eyes at every painful, angry word
But cry over such a simple question
It lets me know that there is no target
No question, no answer, no abstract metaphors
No Shakespearean play that would appear
Because love shows us tragedy without it being poetic

Love makes pain my muse
It makes me look for another ******* inspiration
But love does not make me look in the skies
No, love makes me look in someone else’s eyes

And if you look at the truth of what love makes me
Love makes me human
Reminds me that perfect is non-existent
But it makes me believe we can find it in reality
So when love arrives welcome it warmly
Smile because love did not let you miss an opportunity

I want so badly to slit my wrists,
to give you the chance to forget I even exist.
to put myself out of this misery and finally be alright
to take the blade to my wrists and let the Demond's win this fight.
to add to the scars and marks
to make you see that I'm stuck here In the dark
to wipe this smile off my face and replace it with the look of death that seems to fit right in place
over a hundred times I've slid the blade and kissed the worries goodbye
I've let the blood drip from my arms and the tears stream down my cheeks and I've also ****** it all up in front of you, just to make you feel like you're doing something right.
I wish you knew how much you hurt me, just by glancing at her.
you don't want me anymore and I know it's true. so let me take a few more pills, maybe a few drinks of *****, hang myself up from this rope because it's the only way I know how to cope.