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Thank ye immensely devoted sister Shari
   for availing Shana Aubrey
an expansive plethora of blessedly
   extravagant opportunities
wherein her anatomical fist-sized noggin i.e. grey
matter sponging up - less doable from me
the biological father, who validates
   your doting, helping, kickstarting,
   et cetera I clamor to see!
--------------------------------------------

Matthew Scott Harris Born January 13th, 1959

I shake my shaggy hirsute hair
in utter disbelief, when the cocked arrow
begat thine conception,
when meal ate mum and octogenarian papa

expected their second offspring and only son,
what now seems to be a stepped-up pace,
where father time
doth affix another candle to blow
where the passage of life now measured

in swiftly tailored decades
denoting another birthday,
when in the blink of an eye,
I vividly recall crow
wing like a Lil whippersnapper of a boy
leisurely playing monopoly
for make-believe dough...
--------------------------------------------
nothing ranks as the greatest gift
since being a father twenty-one years ago
then bearing witness to grow
increasing autonomy

of my two precious daughters
whereby each will become master
of their domain, and meet a loving beau
(actually thy eldest dates
a delightful young man
from Puerto Re Coe),

whom intuition discerns would be
a near perfect match –
and this papa intuits dough
nuts to dollars – that such an
em man hint gentle, humble,

intelligent lad – doth ***
pa fully become the future groom
of said firstborn, (which outcome I know
wing couched in a couple of poems

sent his way, and no doubt his smarts lo'
and behold revealed the slightly obscure wish),
where love doth most obviously abound mo'
then prevailed between myself and bride o'

mine these last deuce score
plus (21+) years, but now this Poe
whit aspires to recognize the worthiness of she,
whose chose thyself as a lifetime
groom cuz peaceful status quo

avoiding animosity –
as thyself and spouse gently row
merrily...merrily...merrily
our once quite rickety craft
which oft times in the past needed a tow
off the craggy shoals of constant woe.
242 · May 2017
DESPAIR
the following poem composed years ago when my mindset less upbeat than the present
yet please try to avoid making any judge mint.

Like a tumbleweed aimlessly blowing in the wind
across the infinitely open and wide prairie land
(which wasteland famously epitomized by T.S. Elliot)
a barren vista ravages the metaphorical landscape
of one measly mortal malcontent male
bumping and scraping along an accursed habiliment
just barely avoiding and dodging the diabolical demons
mercilessly and unrelentingly
ready to ****** this somewhat sanguine Simian
who finds himself amidst the pitfalls
of a tortured and twisted existence
racked with the pinions that describe demonic dungeons
damp, dark, demented domains - a veritable no man’s land
and one impossible to escape from no matter how fast I flee
from the fearful, fierce some and phantasmagoric forms
figments of my imagination
yet real and tangible as bone and flesh
who haunt sacred house of slumber
and transmogrify me into a loathsome madman
ranting and raving senseless gibberish and gobbledygook
yet perceived as metaphysical and philosophical sane
and sound syllabification
from one womanly World Wide Web wayfarer
which virtual vagabond venerates vowels
and possesses means and tees to till verse
akin to a sorceress who waves a magic wand
to produce such supreme sentences
and weaves tantalizing terrific topographic tundra’s
that this admirer
of her artful and colorful poetic endeavors
prompts him to accompany her
as a thought-provoking troubadour
amidst the information super byways and highways
along winding labyrinths of critical thinking
or simply stepping stones of silly rhymes without reason
all the while giving subtle egress
into that chamber of secrets
long kept shut tight
to maintain that sure footed stance of solitude
whose only entities happened
to constitute the trappings
of literary lugubriousness
those tombs of largesse identified as great works and masterpieces of literature
yet careful to avoid complete intimacy
lest that cherished solitude
shattered and a heart rent asunder
twin perils of loss
that provide an understandable cautionary tale
to the author of this rambling missive
a most profoundly perceptive and acute Ape man
touched to the quick with a bit of angel dust
and aware that this agonized
and angst riddled  arboreal beast
contents himself with the confines of cyberspace.

from::matthew scott harris
who resides in pennsylvania, usa
email address::hay4four@aol.com
Hands folded prayer like to beseech thee
to abduct me with no cause to up braid
natural temptation found commanding
from divine dada disobeyed
Earthbound Olympian of love,

now dwells amidst mossy secluded glade
a natural bed of soft earthy, downy
canopied bridal awaiting to lovers to get laid
and maybe nine months later,

a baby will resemble thee dear milkmaid
then whence we return to Land O’ Lakes chalet
homage will be paid
in which human guise paramour
doles secrets of amorous Lumineers trade
into dreamland such desire does invade.

Victuals to satiate pleasures of flesh
especially erogenous zones
administered by this imaginary mistress
sin seductive tones
thru this private line, but no other phones

triggering mine little rolling stones
to generate primal sounds vis a vis moans
inducing groin seams of pants extreme groans
toward pocket sixty-nine without lovely bones.

A copious amount of adoration
   suffuses entire body of this man
her, whose gentle and kind embrace
   promises to be eternal plan

as made mention in the Bible,
   Quran, or Torah millennia ago rattan
whose healthy libido
   will probably outlive me life span.

Royal carpet treatment awaits
   me each and every day
as differences between myself
   and august dweller on high
establish a bounty and glory
   of compassion to roll in the hay

atop bodacious, delicious,
   felicitous fantasy asks me to lie
imbibing succulent atmosphere
   akin to an eternal month o may
spirit soaring thousands of miles in the sky.

Upon hearing sweet nothings
   nobody else can hear
affecting heavy breathing
   indicated by nostril imperceptibly dust flare
a sheer grin of joy lights up
   countenance ear to ear,

despite the impish quarks
   of this divine being so dear
as journey to inxs of nirvana
   induced ******* whispered clear
from being buck-naked bare.

while ******* hallucination
   at my male member does yank
key mud hood dill,
   where reality doth usually tank

with muss elf feeling *****
sans figurative or real shaft shank
quite the opposite with a wife acidly rank
she frequently pulls my hair as a childish prank

knowing full well that action turns
   my mood sour as a crank
I would escape, but no money
   in the piggy bank.

Other times, her karma
   roars into a tempest with a rage
lashing out like a half-crazed maniac
   loosed upon global stage
on account of silent battles we regularly wage.

I admit my own fair share of peculiar traits
which only to private confidences t'will now relate
keep on the q-t lest spouse doth berate.

Chief among these oddities comprise
lower gastrointestinal perturbations issuing from the ***
which prompt innumerable outbursts of gas
Ranging from quiet puff to a noisy, windy pass.
Page number three.

After usage of toilet with a bowel movement
large enough to sink a sub
wash ****** residue from my behind
with a hose attached to the tub.

This couple resembles Frankenstein
and his bride – argh what a pair
she taunts when i shower,
   clean the rest of my body including hair
dry follicles shaking head back & forth
   side-to-side through the air.

There you now know foibles
   and unusual personal ways
uttering that such antics how she plays
like netted in a one-man fraternity
   undergoing constant haze
pelting this poor soul

   with scraps of food, she flays
until these covered with thick pasty
   gloppy glaze as verboten entrees
Now laugh till you fall over
   and remain in stitches for days.

by: Matthew Ma Ascot Harris
schwenksville, pennsylvania
19473
How refreshing to experience
     a reprieve from sultry weather
when hazy, hot,
     and humid warm front
     unleashes a very short sweaty tether.

Man hat tin dar overcast skies
     hint potential rain on the way
perchance avast dastardly
     flickr ring instagram

     kickstarter linkedin shutterfly
     Taurus headed soundcloud
     skidding across celestial
     (span hushed) rink

     surprising forecasters by yowl
     ling whimsically, unexpectedly oye vay
training (laser like),
     Asian outsize dark cloud

     climatological frontispiece
     randomly making next stop Old
     Rotten Gotham's Greenwich Village
     zero wing in on

     Poor (Chuck Keys) Uruguay
neighborhood possibly confidently
     foretold by meteorologists today
pointing at map showing

     cold air mass as it doth sashay
July twenty first 2018, though
     Mother Nature defies pre
     diction pulling out all (busted) stops,

     vis a vis via "her" quay
zee bag of tricks nay
saying trained forecasters ****
hush all self importance

     also to humble those mere mortals
     getting paid a handsome buck
by anthropomorphizing viz cluck
king in tandem with duck
billed Baritone Horn
     Trumpeting "FAKE" luck

trotting out obstreperous
     Sunny Rays, who doth beam
with radiance a
     diametrically opposed extreme

over zealous call for precipitation
     instead raining one after another quanta
     bright blinding meme
outsmarting the seem

ming airtight (cat in the bag)
prediction leaving once supreme
vouchsafing without a doubt forecasters
     left holding the empty bag
     large enough tuff fit the whole team.
(house sand zero, and own nine)

Wine hot ja... jes... justa bead devout
boo... boos...***** hound 'n
frog *** (hic cup) bout...
new yea ears rez: hill loo... dang

(burp) louche huns, eh an...,
and beg... agh hen ah nee new wheel 'ear
as zha roosting gadabout
fra... fru... froom this ska...
ski... skid... row... man hunk scout,

ah so... sub... sober chip... er ...,little
tea...poe... *** short and stout
er... chap, cuz in necks stay...hm...
here...ism handle, and thar hiz muss spout
oh...ha rill lee odd doubt

y'all 'member wha...whi...
whoa, what 'prom says 'eed shout
th... hiss hex 'spurt advice
fro...fru...framed dis lout, yea?

What a difference (in meaning), clear
as hub ba hell...(belch) bell jar quake
obvious, (when one not pull lath ta heard) ,
my...er re... rev vol ting... lush 'n not be opaque,
one alphabetic character doth make
duff France sans, the nineteenth versus twenty

first letter of English... lake
really awesome man, how dog nabit,
I could hood **...hu... hoof accomplished...
rather steal piece o'@$$ er...rather tastykake
alm high ghouls when hide goot awake!

As somewhat (hmm...) not so evident,
one need not be a rocket
surgeon, or brain scientist
visa viz mastercard ****
at effect of one sprocket...
nor a judge explaining gobbledygook

of law to witness in docket,
cuz this po boy haint moost
richly endowed in his pocket,
nor talented ska, rocksteady,
or reggae tunesmith
never earning any moolah, but forced to sell
off each dreaded locket.

Fellow Americans, this poetaster
lacking hocus pocus
not merely here tubby chiefly
as time waster, with locus
of airy mission to plant sole

lee seeded to shift your focus
from aimining to satisfy reVolution verse us
impossible mission couched
as reSolution lest ye be deemed
moost laughable joker, who makes major fuss!
January thirteenth two thousand
and nineteen will complete
mine third score orbitz round the sun,
who as a youth evinced

demure and effete
traits, and now weathered, Ongepatshket,
and plenty seasoned,
I feel ready to greet
a garrulous, humorous, and indecorous

Shikse for an indiscreet
liaison, where she will
get reddit to shutterfly,
and twitter like an uber keet
oozing with NON GMO

gluten and monosodium
glutimate saccharine dripping
with au naturale oversweet
ample ***** shapely waist,
and derriere replete

with plenty of junk in the trunk
cavorting, flirting, and issuing manumission
to fraternize, friskily frolic
fruitfully mixing bedlam with bunk
sundering politesse as a "FAKE",
gentlemanly, and honorable hunk,

when in truth,...this lapsed (Lou Zoo Lee)
christened nebish lunk
bookish, loutish, and wonkish teasing
seminarian formerly seclusive monk
keying into my inner philanderer,
yeah...yeah...yeah overdrunk

with prurient fantasies donning an imitation
of (guess who), one
narcissistic trumpeting punk
at heart my idol, no matter the teetering
ship of state he nearly countersunk,
which purportedly mirrors

his Wharton curriculum vitae,
which...well showed he nearly did flunk
apprenticed as POTUS with
FLOTUS attractive trophy
wife (number three) female chunk

and,...oh yes aesthetically
pleasing female real estate
from appearances marriage
barren and devoid of great
je nais sais quois,

though Melania rarely irate,
and partial government shutdown of late
reverberating with fallout, that does oscillate
furloughed federal employees to perspire
principally at increased amortization rate.
241 · Jul 2019
"The Eagle has landed”
Apollo 11 lunar module named “Eagle”
prediction defied naysayers ain't no boon
dog gull announced successful landing
while voice of Ole Blue eyes did croon

in Sea of Tranquility on moon
sometime about high noon
halting advancing armies
from one after another platoon
set down pontoon

bridges across the river Kwai (dune
axe why, the spatial event
July 20, 1969 witnessed great withered
figureheads regaled American dignitaries
even many an centenarian old prune,

plus lovely bones as skeletal rune
none other than remains formerly
Robert Hutchings Goddard exhumed
subsequently astronaut Neil Armstrong

uttered "That's one small step for man,
one giant leap for mankind,"
though skeptics good n plenti
claimed hue moon phase
would never become crater!

Three astronauts gravitated,
celebrated accomplished fete
instrumental proffering accolades
glock o' spiel trumpeted didgeridoo
courtesy King of rock and Queen

arduous encapsulated endeavor
spurred ravenous appetite
they got the moon cheese
lunar than later nibbled moonpie
washed down with spot of tea.

Heroes welcome greeted
podcast linkedin crew
upon their successful
accomplished impossible mission
returned to umble Earth
bootlegged moonshine stowed
within light saddle

sore ring hearts skipped beat
felt over the moon,
nonetheless by George underwent
thoroughly good medical examination
afflicted with minor malady,
not deemed more serious
than cardiovascular lunar tick.

Fast forward Fifty Earth orbitz chock
full of journeys light years distant pock
marked little uninhabited rock
quite quaint outer limits mostly schlock
of twilight zone by Spock,
he of Starship Enterprise.

No hint what prospects doth lie ahead
for future generations, centuries after
present madding crowd long since dead
yes, the space travel science fiction
authors flesh out today
will arrive within blink, whereby
fantasy with reality will wed.
I take stock and revisit good ole days of yore
quite conscious undeclared state of war
prevails within body electric of troubadour
now seated at his Macbook Pro
today February 20, 2021.

Since January thirteenth of this year
(two thousand and twenty one),
yours truly suddenly feels
long in the tooth, i.e. auld,
he whose decrepit body and
gnarled hands ice cold
rigor mortis virtuous vice grip extolled
coronavirus (COVID-19) motherlode
analogous to discovered vein of mined gold

grim reaper with scythe doth silently infold
(in Old English, scythe spelled siðe)
ore yonder church bell knolled
anonymous sexagenarian
(any strong resemblance between said poet
whose dead head lolled),
and once living person purely coincidental)
death and decay, I lichen to mold
scant personal possessions outsold
to highest bidder.

Dead weatherbeaten and fatigued soul
with absolute zero regret
no longer being alive,
especially when endurance and stamina
took kamikaze nose dive
formerly buzzfeeding
desiccated honeycomb hive

in tandem with former anxiety riddled psyche
need no longer worry
his existence perfect example
how hardship did misthrive
death be not proud penultimate quest
since adolescence (think anorexia nervosa)
he did (unsuccessfully) strive.

At long last... beastie boy attained nirvana
routing hellish existential crisis
courtesy earth, wind and fire
rendered null and void celibate journey
knight in shining armor
forever staind and tarnished
compliments verboten extramarital whoopie.

Herewith I forthwith take poetic license
linkedin to long line of mamas and the papas
whose music died
when passenger(s) violently perished
courtesy flaming inferno
analogous to L(ead) Z(eppelin) 129
christened Hindenburg.

Along similar blurred lines
foo fighter manned ****** temple pilot
Jefferson Airplane qua Starship
gracefully and slickly
deliberately maneuvered crash test dummy
immediately annihilated upon impact
smack dab into puddle of mudd,
yet lo and behold as a foreigner
and survivor yours truly eluded dire straits.

Oz suppose during whirlwind Kansas tour,
while snatching forty winks
in toto working out kinks,
I experienced revelation
regarding divine creator - Egypt me
never securing life, liberty
and pursuit of happiness
elusive weltanschauung as understanding,

the mysterious Sphinx,
yes essentially zilch joie de vivre
minus high jinks
aptly summarizes mein kampf methinks
my life and hard times
whereby vitriol pelted me
courtesy those rat finks.

Nihilistic zeitgeist
apocalyptic outlook sacrificed
no redemption no matter
how figuratively purposelessness sliced
unlike mum man crucified Jesus Christ.
(an All Poetry feat to walk in
the poetic feet of Robert Frost)

Bucolic New England, circa
Early twentieth century New England
awash with dynamic harmonic leisureliness,
when much of North America favored rustic

visual whirled wide webbed watercolor
waiting afield at dusk, the thrum
of nature all abuzz didst feed thine
dizzily green jovial mien

unlike mean Gary Lewis
veritable innocence and naiveté
rollicked with mine lanky frame
relishing ambling into my own quietude

an infinite breadth, length and scope
of infrequently trammeled near ******
woodland paths grown over with brambles
nonetheless a faintly trussed harbinger

marked by weatherbeaten
for sale signposts
with here and there an abandoned plow
long since given over

to rust when the pasture
seasons elapsed since
farmer(s) left unharvested
fecund fields absent

the cloven hoof,
and deprived enrichment
manure, sans ungulates
ceased sufficing healthy

free ranging bovines,
where etudes punctuated
the terribly gross fresh air,
now no longer audibly quickening,

snapchatting, nor twittering
with the last word of a bluebird
deathly silence now 'cept
the wind in the willows

whispering woebegone laments
tree tops pining to cradle
idle youthful dreamers
boughs devoid of

psalm quivering romantic songstress
clattering debris merely
delivering echoed whooshing refrains
continually disintegrating among

in a disused graveyard
prescient ken aches with nostalgia
hallucinogenic nightmare slams
irrevocably shut the door in the dark

closed for good upon the onset,
wrought genocide against
the vanishing Red man,
a ghostly scarification meaningless ritual
wrested, removed, and highjacked

from indigenous peoples
without rhyme, nor reason
as fraternities no
longer pledge allegiance.
Yah, ma brew their,
     and American sister golden hair -
     afar and away
book as aye ken ream hem bar,
     yea when yar **** jist a bay
bee, *** me
     verily hoppy goo
     loo key lil boy whar 'r each day

o'r flowed with giddiness oot nar the
     secluded Harris estuary
frolicked amidst muscled shoals
     gnome hatter sky turned
     f'ty shades o' gray
hawk cool when
     **** heat squished sand
     hall lung pristine beach hooray

ah...those memories (hmm...oh...well)
     wii ch war newt mine,
     boot bar rowed fur room Jay
son and  argonauts cave his Oh kay
seance ah waz tip poor
     tuff ford me own may
mar ease, noon thee lass nay
var tha lease, aye fain tis eyes hub boat

     hoof "FAKE" sea
     yuck rat passageway
along tha loon lee coo west
     hove yar hug quay
thee pass sea if 'ick Ou shin sum
     moo with as ray
dee aunt gull lass oon lake now win me
daughter ring auld age aye

wharf heal moss elf ill eagle
     red dee tug *** bye
bye, cuz hive eel
     emotionally frenzied, harried,
     and jangled as if
     o'er dost hay'n reedy to die
on barb bit char writs eye
lichen to a class five

Saffir-Simpson Hurricane, no...no...no...
     methinks oh pen hee van
     thar iz a big oop stares "guy"
     seen 'm once, when we booth said "Hi"
aye **** juiced up t'har - me no lie,
what, a stripling lad,
     (thus jist man hedge gin my
flat hand outstretched wheel nigh

fin gars call loess tug getter try
tou pet yar palm awk
     coo pull hove feet
     fur him tha floor),
     now (NOT FAKE) chalk
wii ch hide id hawk
daring ma prime er skool daze
     didst slip smooth white

     totally tubular woo din
     lock (like) thin small
     round joint long stalk
con vein y'ant lee a'signed
     tuck clap 'race ears oot side den maze
wen axed bite t'eat char, me Noah talk!
After beguiling charisma,
damnable excoriations fixedly,
gamely, horribly, insult jesting,
kibitzing, loosely mindless nattering,

outlandish pablum, quintessentially
representing senseless trumpeting,
unswervingly vapid wordy
X-DOUBLE-MINUS
yawping zest.

If ye did not already guess from thee
above blimey claptrap, Das English flap
doodle glib human incorporates jokingly,
kookily, laughably mashedup nonsensical,

oddly, peculiarly, questionably ridiculous,
spluttering total unintelligible virtually
witless Xmas yakking zany tripe
writes hello albeit as Abbott Long Winded.

This uneventful life of mine desperately
clings (nee plaintively begs cessation
from ****** condemnation since...well,
when alma mater of fact abracadabra magic)

assailed, thence rendered blinkered existence
moot. Prolongation experiencing sustained
nirvana, wrought pitiless cooptation diminishing
enlightened fruition. No matter impossible

to believe omniscient prediction nearly came
to naught. Instant karma graced ecstatic grandeur.
This abbreviated attestation cognitively laughable,
a mere figment of imagination. Ultimate acquisition

asper beholding heavenly jurisdiction limited to
infinitesimal immeasurable marginalization.
Representation allowing, enabling, and providing
sustained self actualization, a willow o the wisp

pipe dream visitation. Appetite whetted
via smidgen spiritual delectation. Now angelic
amplification, declaration, and glorification stymied,
and only briefly espied, when unfettered temptation

sensing an Indus scribe Hubble lucubrate fashioned
afterlife became accidentally accessible. Now???
Utter Pradesh futility, imbecility, and lunacy
to experience sublimation viz cosmic conscious

Creator! Impossible to lie prostrate, thence
whisper vis a vis instigation, intonation, and/or
invocation lamentably ordaining realization
sans, re cap cha, analogous to verboten fruit,

which similarly anointed, when faint approximation
(fulfilling fleeting fatherhood feint), the  
******* exaltation additionallygrounded.
Thus a blackened imprecation exponentially

fulminates, pestiferously quakes, and
sycophantically tortures purposely, viciously
increasesing prolongation of deprivation.
Despair erodes faithful generation formerly

harvesting insightful joyous kinship with long
lost loves. Salivation for salvation even pronounced
via declaration for crucifixion. Mine kismet grounded
spiritual gypped facilitation instills voluntary extradition.

This native American son willingly adopted
Alfred E. Neuman disguise. Outfitted thus,
while astride Red Baron (docile caparisoned horse),
I will sacrifice mortality surrendering selflessness

to trumpeting, and subsequent permanent deportation
among grateful dead, who defy condemnation
at the price of corporeal longevity. Hallelujahs,
hexameter hosannas, and hurrahs vocalized.

Transition thru divine gabled (invitation only)
dominion extolling democratization, a lifelong
(qua death short) aspiration alm ma LIX spittled
emotionally kudzu choked up existence. Now

blessed eternal peace handily given after thine
incessant pleading,whereat each outstretched palm
olive adrip with perspiration. Redemption (though
atheistic bent) effort likened to universalistic,

naturalistic, holistic, and cathartic balms despite
all this twaddle i.e. unnecessary verbalization,
sans obfuscation, jocular equivocation.
Translation even more onerous from this: Man
Hue Sscript!
238 · Jul 2019
Wild goose chase
Pursuit for elusive prey
teases yours truly
into treacherous catacombs
dangerous mentally
challenging pitfalls,

sets small hairs of back
on camp creeks edge
of night, where dark shadows
evoke outer limits
of twilight zone

prompting me constantly questioning
purposefulness, qua hair raising pursuit
embarking these modern roman times
all for naught,
nonetheless I chide self

failing to heed
emotional, mental, psychological...fallout
in sum re: springing Jack in the box reflex
to sally forth and earn kudos,
asper potential Prince Valiant.

Thus situated with blank computer screen
capacious external Lenovo for myopia
(and incessant squiggly floaters to boat),
this literary glutton for punishment
feverishly fixates to plumb depths

(measuring mor'n 10,000
leagues under the see
ming lee impossible mission
to ensnare nearly extinct
fluttering, lyfting, shutterflying...

smarts to outwit unsuspecting
beak henning quest
tendering, tasting uber victory
quivering crossbow
targeting yawping

zoological discovery - channeling
primed with taut fletched arrow
on high alert for stool pigeon
cautiously optimistic kickstarting
another futile attempt dagnabbit
experiencing prestige,

oh...and by the way...,
no animal harmed
regarding made for video poem
gamely capturing quarry scotched,
nor gruesome scene

synonymous quasi abattoir
representative bird den sum
bloodless coup deeming
endeavor par excellence.

Fingers madly scramble
to poach skittering idea
fry day most ideal
omelette ya know,
aye feel yolked to defeatism,

one after another faux
promising brainstorm egging
quickly flitting inaccessible
potential flash in frying pan
just as fast dashing

into bajillion pieces
shell shocked scrivener
scribbling lame as duck
goose laying golden egg...
dropping immediately out of sight,

maybe best resigning forlorn
inchoate never albumen,
albeit quite linguistic stretch for
(all be human success story)
prospects beyond reach

ova this wretch
New York Times
bestseller author jinxed
forever dooming yours truly
grinding poverty my ill fate.
Puberty set off affright
seeding decades long
     terrestrial space flight
freighted existential blight,
wherefore from that
attempt to live airtight
many scores yesternight
ago, I barely (except

     on par with grateful
     dead), zero excite
ment minimally functioned,
     cuz high felt spite
fully lost (in the forest)
     rooted with shaky tree mens,
     (viz dose zen sips
     quaffed by same drink

     Rip Van Winkle drank)
     to evade adolescent phase highlight
ten en bold den lack
     luster vim, though erudite
bereft excel lent outlook
     in access hubble, sans vehemently
     opposed to living
     social at the height

of teenage torturous travails up
     to present day nearly downright
everyday challenge on par
     with metaphorical bullfight,
a mailer daemon
     beastie boy foo fist fight,
ting non grata poker faced
     aware with hindsight

(born that way
     inside me noggin)
     darker than midnight
impossible to take flight
against shell fish ogre egging to
     take a deadly bite
compromising psychological
     terra incognita mental landscape

     also likened to
     pitched - bat tilled him of thee
     republic where searchlight
revealed reviled cat and/or dogfight,
yet actually e'en preceding
     boy to man transformation
     dire wrecked bombsight,
(noah doubt ******

     social and physical height)
when adolescent basic instinct of mine
     lacked sixth sense reading
     expressed ****** features of people
     lacking instinctive searchlight,
aye absent keen insight
by this self dubbed emotional Anchorite
     ill equipped mein ways disallowing

     me every twelfth night
to differentiate discern,
     and divine subtle
     nonverbal, yet critical cues,
     which figuratively wheel
     lee "spoke" volumes
     oft times more might
tee than words uttered

     by sword shaped tongue
     pronouncing syllables light
immediately wrought seize yore,
     (analogous to stony glare
emanating from an invisible Gorgon)
or harshly, yet mine skintight
     suppressed oral communication
     if exercised probably fended

     coulda more satisfactorily
     quickly, and obviously
     thwarted doggone socially quite
scared state, inducing preflight
adrenaline kick
      starter activation, rushing

     within myself, a sorry sight
for sore eyes,
     which found yours truly
     to became immediately
     flush with utter embarrassment.
Wɜrdz spɛld kəˈrɛkt ˈvɜrsəs fəˈnɛtɪkˈspɛlɪŋ

alternately titled fun with phonics
ˈɔltərnətli ˈtaɪtəld fʌn wɪð ˈfɑnɪks
analogous when like first learning how to spell American English words

Əˈnæləgəs wɛn laɪk fɜrst ˈlɜrnɪŋ haʊ tu spɛl əˈmɛrəkən ˈɪŋglɪʃ wɜrdz

I thought to feign not knowing how to spell American English words

Aɪ θɔt tu feɪn nɑt ˈnoʊɪŋ haʊ tu spɛl əˈmɛrəkən ˈɪŋglɪʃ wɜrdz

and quickly realized the daunting task,

Ænd ˈkwɪkli ˈriəˌlaɪzd ðə ˈdɔntɪŋ tæsk,

thus sought magnanimity, gratuity, courtesy...
Google search (phonetic transcription of words) to assist me

Ðʌs sɔt magnanimity, grəˈtuɪti, ˈkɜrtəsi..
ˈgugəl sɜrʧ (fəˈnɛtɪk ˌtrænˈskrɪpʃən ʌv wɜrdz) tu əˈsɪst mi

Words spelled correct versus phonetic spelling
(the latter appended after poem concludes).

Thus now begins feeble attempt
to render rhyme for no reason
appended with phonetic translation
mainly as playful tease zen
synonymous imagining teaching
said exercise to eager children

reminding readers that young
and restless with spotty attention
hear spoken word while in utero,
post natal, subsequently when
he/she parrots parent(s) and/or

guardian, a more deliberate yen
arises to acquire greater cognition,
intuition, question (quest ja hen)
quickly devolving into faux ken
barbed riotous laughter analogous
trying wits of patient comedian/

comedienne resorting quite often
to repetition, remonstration,
reiteration... which frustration
might necessitate taking ten,
or so minutes of intermission
mindful mentor praises pen

ultimate verbal adroit ability
earning healthy treat for recitation,
perhaps recipient exceptionally
eager to advance passing golden
milestone able, ready, and will ***
to tackle writing correct spelling,

whence learning to hold pen(cil)
(without being vain) begin men
till process, which next step den
allows, enables and provides sen
sit heave hands on guidance

helping preschooler - all liven
and well with enthusiasm clutch
writing implement fingers open
before gently grasping above ren
during kudos with an amen.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

wɜrdz spɛld kəˈrɛkt ˈvɜrsəs fəˈnɛtɪk ˈspɛlɪŋ

Ðʌs naʊ bɪˈgɪnz ˈfibəl əˈtɛmpt
tu ˈrɛndər raɪm fɔr noʊ ˈrizən
əˈpɛndɪd wɪð fəˈnɛtɪk trænˈzleɪʃən
ˈmeɪnli æz ˈpleɪfəl tiz zɛn
səˈnɑnəməs ɪˈmæʤənɪŋ ˈtiʧɪŋ
sɛd ˈɛksərˌsaɪz tu ˈigər ˈʧɪldrən

riˈmaɪndɪŋ ˈridərz ðæt jʌŋ
ænd ˈrɛstləs wɪð ˈspɑti əˈtɛnʃən
hir ˈspoʊkən wɜrd waɪl ɪn ˈjutəroʊ,

poʊst ˈneɪtəl, ˈsʌbsəkwəntli wɛn
hi/ʃi ˈpɛrəts ˈpɛrənt(ɛs) ænd/ɔr
ˈgɑrdiən, ə mɔr dɪˈlɪb(ə)rət jɛn
əˈraɪzəz tu əˈkwaɪər ˈgreɪtər kɑgˈnɪʃən,
ˌɪntuˈɪʃən, ˈkwɛsʧən (kwɛst jɑ hɛn)

ˈkwɪkli dɪˈvɑlvɪŋ ˈɪntu fɔks kɛn
bɑrbd ˈraɪətəs ˈlæftər əˈnæləgəs
ˈtraɪɪŋ wɪts ʌv ˈpeɪʃənt kəˈmidiən/
kəˌmidiˈɛn rɪˈzɔrtɪŋ kwaɪt ˈɔfən
tu ˌrɛpəˈtɪʃən, remonstration,
riˌɪtəˈreɪʃən... wɪʧ frəˈstreɪʃən

maɪt nəˈsɛsəˌteɪt ˈteɪkɪŋ tɛn,
ɔr soʊ ˈmɪnəts ʌv ˌɪntərˈmɪʃən
ˈmaɪndfəl ˈmɛnˌtɔr ˈpreɪzəz pɛn
ˈʌltəmət ˈvɜrbəl əˈdrɔɪt əˈbɪləti
ˈɜrnɪŋ ˈhɛlθi trit fɔr ˌrɛsəˈteɪʃən,
pərˈhæps rəˈsɪpiənt ɪkˈsɛpʃənəli

ˈigər tu ədˈvæns ˈpæsɪŋ ˈgoʊldən
ˈmaɪlˌstoʊn ˈeɪbəl, ˈrɛdi, ænd wɪl lɛn
tu ˈtækəl ˈraɪtɪŋ kəˈrɛkt ˈspɛlɪŋ,
wɛns ˈlɜrnɪŋ tu hoʊld pɛn(cil)
(wɪˈθaʊt ˈbiɪŋ veɪn) bɪˈgɪn mɛn
tɪl ˈprɑˌsɛs, wɪʧ nɛkst stɛp dɛn
əˈlaʊz, ɛˈneɪbəlz ænd prəˈvaɪdz sɛn

sɪt *** hændz ɑn ˈgaɪdəns
ˈhɛlpɪŋ ˈpriˌskulər - ɔl ˈlaɪvən
ænd wɛl wɪð ɪnˈθuziˌæzəm klʌʧ
ˈraɪtɪŋ ˈɪmpləmənt ˈfɪŋgərz ˈoʊpən
bɪˈfɔr ˈʤɛntli ˈgræspɪŋ əˈbʌv rɛn
ˈdʊrɪŋ ˈkudoʊs wɪð ən eɪˈmɛn.
Methinks perchance man
     kind always vain
n'er did appertain
moral hike polar opposite
     from human being:
uncivil, unethical, unsocial, et cetera
     minimally app proxy
     mating, neither didst

     faithfully abide as citizen Kane
externally - nar main
ten an ounce, (asper
     atop figurative fain
faux shaw didst attain
"FAKE" horn o' manners), tolerance,
     our predecessors didst abstain
nor internally betweenbrain,

sans modest straight,
     and ne'r did entertain
narrow true lofty salient tenet
     absence of virtue
     tis no matter pray'n -
quite self evident, plain
as day, and vice gripped by
     fratricide (or homicide

     in general) endemic throughout
     evolution of humanity dripping
     nee gushing more'n
     nah globule bloodstain,
viz more aptly bloodbath,
     haply insinuated, embedded,
     and accrued heart
     felt toehold gain

saying division among
     caveman club rings
     animal hides
     pelt did maintain
bare co-opted spirit hood
     did micro reign
buzzfeed ding death,
     via plenti did retain

aplomb murderous sprees kickstarter
     thankfully guaranteeing (ha)
     hardy internecine characteristic
kept in lock step with
     protohumans enlightenment, qua
     i.e. as earliest primates
     acquired innate haughty
     apropos boastfulness

     to ascend chain
of command anointing insane
lee flattering hashtag, re:
     (albeit ill fit
     ting), yet utopian
appellation "noble savage,"
which inchoate bipedal hominids
     (forerunners of **** sapiens),

     quickly dost wrought impertinent
     sobriquet (by anonymous
     simian "Einstein brain
child"), viz favored
     killing one another
strove and still thrives,
     since Adam and Eve,
     for sport, but most

     dramatically didst appear
     purportedly, when Abel
     got slain by Cain
punctuated equilibrium
     lopping limb
     and/or head off if one
     didst dissent or complain
setting precedent

     for consanguineous
modern Roman Times
     (font size twelve) brutish,
     nasty, and short train
ning supposedly
     "civilized insubordinate"
     foo fighting beastie boy
     received fatal crackbrain

with imprimatur challenging authority,
     sans grossly wading,
     brazen overstepping
     circumscribed domain,
where thwack on noggin
     determined, hence did explain
survival of fittest.
Unbeknownst to me if royal
gilded crests comprised
my rusty dust caked coat of arms
hence, I take liberty successfully farms
productive crop to contrive fictitious
Medieval Age forebears
with favorable charms
strong agile hands

hurling crude accouterments
centuries prior to invention of firearms,
which weapons (of mass sieve construction)
privy to proto gendarmes,
this inventiveness of mine conjures
courageous knights in shining armor,
perhaps monogrammed,
hammered chain metal,

nonetheless such endeavor quite a chore
where love's labors not lost,
viz hub bully accepting, condoning,
and employing embellishments extempore,
whereby solar rays alight,
flickr, and glint glore
re: us astral motifs, the stellar
craftsmanship one (even a poor,

indigent destitute beggar
like yours truly)
could not ignore
exquisite baldric, exotic, and heraldic
trappings incorporating magical lore
aesthetically pleasing

fascinating, and appealing to one poor
uneducated disheveled rhapsodic bohemian
incumbent jibber jabbering, hallucinating,
and fancying deplorable basket case to restore
himself, the legitimate true heir,
who could double as

courtly jesting troubadour,
whose slain grand papa Aaron Harris
violently ousted during Uber Vodafone War
constitutes dreamy gotcha your
attention fabricated and
facilitated to Zoar,

an actual ancient city
anachronistically inserted here
thanks to Lot, whose Biblical reference
Google made me aware,
which ye probably care
nary a fig about, but
placename linkedin mere
to allow, enable and provide bare,

lee tenuous appeal dare
ring me to trump
poetic formality near
rolly returning full circle (one tough Job)
manufacturing prevarication
recounting "FAKE" heir
essentially envisioning, imagining,

and jimmying gallant
high in the saddle career
timeless lifeline chess piece
of centuries gone by
enshrouded with reverence by this air
rent considerably less provocative
then missives by Baudelaire.
Quite an undertaking
to break ground
figuratively, and symbolically linkedin
while able bodied and mindedness
readies cemetery plot within Elysian Fields
although honestly, and truthfully
as an ***** donor,
yours truly opts for cremation
once I, the corporeal constituent essence
that constitutes breadth,
height, length, et cetera
of one garden variety generic guy,
whose introspective consciousness
once exits these lovely bones
subsequently shucks off his ethereal soul.

Probable cause of death
and reasonable rhyme
how he died with his boots on?

Accidental overdose spelt demise of Vitamin ******
with over the counter supplements he did monkey.

Apple Cider Vinegar Gummies
Biotin 10,000 mcg
Brain Support Gummies
Super B Complex with Vitamin C
Calcium 1200 MG plus Vitamin D3
Chewable Vitamin C dietary supplement
Daily De-Stress
Vitamin E 400 IU (180 mg)
Echinacea 400 mg
Fiber Gummies
Flaxseed Oil with OMEGA-3 1300 mg
Garlic 400 mg
Ginger Root 550 mg
Ginkgo Biloba 120 mg
Hair, Skin & Nails Gummies
Prebiotic Immune Support 750 mg
with Vitamin D 30 mcg 1200 IU
with Zinc 8.3 mg
Psyllium Husk
Selenium 200 mcg
Turmeric 500 mg
Vitamin A 2400 mcg

Alphabetized list of above
stockpiled synthesized materials
purchased at CVS and Walgreens
courtesy Nations Benefits
and/or United HealthCare flex card
allow, enable, and provide
careful discriminate experimentation
on self - selected as guinea pig
more tolerable versus when being a little boy
and bullied by ruthless nasty
and shortish brutes as scapegoat
of course discriminately
taking a subset of iterated
prescribed macronutrients
each including following specified dose.

A healthy corpse
when the grim reaper calls,
I will gladly bid adieu
bon voyage into the netherworld
and good riddance
to him (a good for nothing)
randy sandy donning tan hat man
Squirreling acorn née joke
hinting courtesy humorous literary arabesques
absent minded handy dandy blue's clue
imploring accomplice Jimmy Neutron,
who willingly frankly (iggy lee)
casually opened, popped, and zapped
license to **** himself softly
while listening to Pathetique adagio cantabile
by Ludwig Van Beethoven
courtesy over the counter supplements,
the Food and Drug Administration doth not eschew.

Mastermind of the universe, I
a skeptic (with flat thinning hair,
yet shrinking paunch)
regarding divine creationism,
nevertheless accepts mortality
as stepping stone
into nothingness that follows,
repurposing random arrangement
of atoms and molecules
that configured one
contemplative, intuitive, operative
and restive **** sapien
(essentially composed of stardust)
reincarnated into another form of matter.

After crafting especially
individualized invitations
répondez s'il vous plaît
as the spirit moves thee.
got what he wanted at my expense.

Said crack fast talking
hacker and scammer
pulled figurative wool over my eyes
going incognito and speaking a clipped
English mien his disguise.

He appeared (rather sounded) genuine
after yours truly experienced computer snafu
(the Macbook Pro essentially hogtied
courtesy virus that disabled any activity)
even turning the laptop off then on
only wrought frustration to boot.

An out of state Apple computer
technical support person impersonator
(imposter invariably linkedin
to aforementioned fraudster -
most likely brother in arms)
answered telephone number
provided on the screen.

Admonitions against sharing details
about case in point, whereby cyberpunk
donned many hats to convince me
serious computer virus,
malware, trojan horse, et cetera
counterbalanced with voice on other end
affecting sedulousness to "listen carefully"
and carry forth the following commands.

Yours truly trustingly,
passively, meekly, et cetera
(though feeling jittery)
carried out the repeated instructions,
which charlatan inveighed against
speaking softly (in retrospect,
I ought to have carried a big stick),
indicating (as if held at gunpoint)
to headout off to the Trappe branch
of Citizens Banks and withdraw cash
all the while recording verbal dialogue
with small, medium at large criminal
(the scam artist(s) in question).

Upon retrieving legal tender
(quite a ***), thee next entrapment
entailed driving to closest ATM machine,
an MP gas station/convenience store
in Collegeville to convert
high denomination bills
(a considerable number
of money crisp Benjamins)
into bitcoin cryptocurrency
then hightailing back to where I live,
an assisted living facility
named Highland Manor.

Finally, the schmegegge script
(incorporating ejaculations that
questionable hacker convinced me
to swallow hook, line and sinker)
alluded to strong likelihood
scam artist lurked in close proximity
to above named banking institution,
which divine comedy bumbling
Ace of spades, an inept card shark
anagram name Meg Found
left as crypto clue told.
entrapped within webbed wide world
weft as a **** pulled stilts skein
at warp speed exhibiting
my heroic trumpian wiles
cuz he (johnny come lately) a then
exemplary hedonist, narcissist,
and polygamist dons
comical, farcical, illogical, lunatical...
offal dolled up endearing guise,
when inconvenient truth broached

particularly determining paternity,
no matter countless progeny sport windblown
swiftly tailored mimicked
matted coiffure of mine
resembling hirsute trademark
of appalling though
revered forty fifth president,
nevertheless harried hair styles
in tandem with fabrications riles
the madding crowd - myself included

into frenzied ******* state,
no matter yours truly upholds
voluntary penitential platonic
marital modus operandi
suddenly as one celibate sexagenarian
absent physical *******
intolerable as hemorrhoids or piles
analogous to flat footed
yardbird schlepping miles
joining the long line of exiles.

Vice president of United states
gifted with maiden name Harris,
whose surname same as mine
one I feel like a proud boy to profess,
cuz ma late polymath
papa jack of all trades
self taught handyman skills
as an A1 roofer who repaired
and raised the entire roof
from stem to stern

never contracted shingles,
nor did his prodigal son - yours truly - me
experience the bane of painful rash
that can appear as a stripe of blisters
that wraps around the side of the torso
and caused by varicella-zoster virus (VZV),
the same virus that causes chickenpox,
hence Preparation H
best over the counter ideal balm
to ameliorate painful ****** itch

and thwart bummed out uneasiness,
enjoying consummated adultery
avoiding using uncomfortable prophylactics
(prickly prohibited topic dejure)
though riding *******
doth severely aggravate,
complicate, impregnate, and vitiate
surrogate domestic policy
putting a modern spin
on Anna and the King of Siam

with intent to create aery vision of utopia,
where videre licet barenaked ladies
essentially gamely frolic
in the autumn mist
fomenting one after another
to tease out rock ribbed ready *******
with premature ******* for excitation
Harum-scarum fidelity be ******
bordello supplants "city on a hill"
buzzfeeding ******* bunnies

with fourteen carrots to squire
then politely escort each
to their respective boudoir
in a blatant, explicit effort
to foster and grow caliphate
at the expense of electorate qualm
impossible mission to keep
brood of squired earthlings in the balance
portends especial ominous nightmare
if Project 2025 implemented

also known as
the 2025 Presidential Transition Project,
constitutes a political initiative
published by the Heritage Foundation
that aims to promote conservative
and right-wing policies
to reshape the United States federal government
and consolidate executive power
if the Republican candidate
garners majority of votes

making first day on the Somme
feel like kindergarten tussle
as anarchy rears up across
United States of America
pitting (olive him nonetheless) despicable
unnamed despot wannabe
analogous courtesy unsettled Leviathan
surfacing from the deep cyber sea
against cherished inalienable
constitutional rights buoying

the land of the free
and home of the brave
renting the country asunder,
with incendiary vitriolic rhetoric,
which similar fate befell Vietnam
thanks be partially
to hydrogenated, and promulgated
American foreign policy.
as highlighted below
to recaptcha wretched colonialism.

The (shameful – my input) about United States' foreign policy in Vietnam was shaped by several factors, including the Domino Theory, the Vietnam War, and the legacy of the war:

The Domino Theory
The U.S. foreign policy after World War II was based on the idea that if one country fell to Communism, the surrounding countries would follow, like dominoes.

The Vietnam War
The U.S. supported South Vietnam against North Vietnam, and fought in the war directly. The U.S. trained and assisted South Vietnamese forces, and conducted ground operations, river and canal patrols, and more. The war was costly and divisive, with estimates of over 3 million Vietnamese deaths and around 58,318 American deaths.

The legacy of the war
After the war, the U.S. imposed a trade embargo on Vietnam and severed ties with the country. The U.S. believed that Vietnam had violated the Paris Peace Accords and had not accounted for American prisoners of war. The embargo lasted until 1994.

Normalizing relations
In the 1990s, President Bill Clinton began normalizing diplomatic relations with Vietnam. Today, the U.S. and Vietnam have a relationship that includes maritime security assistance, and partnerships between Vietnamese universities and U.S. higher education institutions. 

The United States' foreign policy in Vietnam was shaped by several factors, including the Domino Theory, the Vietnam War, and the legacy of the war:

The Domino Theory
The U.S. foreign policy after World War II was based on the idea that if one country fell to Communism, the surrounding countries would follow, like dominoes.

The Vietnam War
The U.S. supported South Vietnam against North Vietnam, and fought in the war directly. The U.S. trained and assisted South Vietnamese forces, and conducted ground operations, river and canal patrols, and more. The war was costly and divisive, with estimates of over 3 million Vietnamese deaths and around 58,318 American deaths.

The legacy of the war
After the war, the U.S. imposed a trade embargo on Vietnam and severed ties with the country. The U.S. believed that Vietnam had violated the Paris Peace Accords and had not accounted for American prisoners of war. The embargo lasted until 1994.

Normalizing relations
In the 1990s, President Bill Clinton began normalizing diplomatic relations with Vietnam. Today, the U.S. and Vietnam have a relationship that includes maritime security assistance, and partnerships between Vietnamese universities and U.S. higher education institutions.

Before concluding this poem,
I wanna hammer home,
and nail laughable
personal misperception of
suspecting that roofers
specifically plagued with shingles
constituted from the following materials.

Asphalt: A traditional choice
for homeowners, asphalt shingles
made from a fiberglass or paper mat
covered in tar and granules.

Composite: These synthetic shingles
made from a combination of materials,
including recycled materials,
slate, laminate, and wood.

Wood: Wood shingles and shakes
made from logs of trees like Western Red Cedar,
Cypress, pine, or Redwood.

Some pieces are treated
with preservatives or fire retardants.
232 · Jan 2022
The Antics Of A Yoyo Thief
Now scores of years
after botched minor theft penchant
courtesy security guard
analogous to inquisitorial trenchant
unforgettable verbal lashing
(suppressing me ululation to vent)
unwittingly arresting snitch behavior
plus potential life of crime.

Not a peep passed thru
pursed lip o' mine -
aye vaguely attest
what age ten? eleven? twelve?
of following anecdote at best
educated guess, but no
doubt yours truly
with figurative heart in chest
scared sh__less puny meek boy
tight lipped silently confessed

to foiled attempt, sans trying
unsuccessfully to steal a yoyo,
during Saturday's short break
between gymnastic class
inviting tummy prepubescent
diminutive self unbuttoning
outer garment to stash loot,
revealing substantially sprawling
holy skype size bare breast,
after officer verbally rifled me

said mean security detail
demanding I undress
impossible mission to escape
upon being nabbed,
held me arms tight,
cuz yours truly
ain't no Artful Dodger  
thus aye didst detest
foolish kid ploy, and
(prematurely nipping

in the bud) messed
up potential life of crime
with first and only
shoplifting heist jest
for getting caught no a pest
key yoyo, mama would
(IF ever mama or papa FOUND OUT)
they would axe me no quest
chin, but whack me itty bitty
teensy weensy derriere lest

quickly putting to rest
any Robin Hood
fantasy life of riding crest
to get rich quick scheme
high stakes crime pressed,
and squeezed out the noggin
with apropos punishment addressed
thankfully, neither parent
got wind, nor ever guessed
their beautiful darling

little boy did flunk
electric kool aid acid test
petty theft, never
matured nor ever again did zest
proliferate to ****** unpaid for goods
into a profitable "yoyo
string Ponzi like
scheme," thus ballsiest
dare devilish and bitterest,
and laughably noblest

act yours truly ever attempted
immediately ceased to shelve bravest
sleight of hand find
delve during broadest
daylight, I immediately
didst abandon, when clumsiest
initial foray into
the world wide web
tubby come cleverest
lad, this side of

Lansdale, Pennsylvania
many damnedest
yesterdays ago, never
took another earnest
tempting gamble since security
detail nearly wrest
head possible zapped feeblest Ames?
to pilfer from other
Department stores if pressed
for money no matter,
I might miss an enforced
hated ballet class,
with abs salute zest
worse fate than juvenile detention!
(what...me write vernacular English???)

Okay, the gist of anemic
     checking account averred
asked from one
     FaceBook English Literary bird,
I could plainly enumerate
     Sachin be cured
of spellbinding nightmares,
     and not accused

    of acting demurred
the esse cent chill
     dime a dozen premise ensured
prime merrily to discover
     visa wells Fargo
     sieve err (ala Eratosthenes) forward
solution, whereby means
     to save money

     against being gored
no...no...no...not to be stingy,
     nor selfishly hoard
meager unearned social security
     monthly allotment, aye ignored
to mention as key piece
     of information a dub bill
lit tete ting bout with anxiety,

     obsessive compulsive, not cavil
air lee shaken off and schizoid
     personality disorder like evil
mailer daemons, which
     undermined ability to full fill
quality existence, and even
     prescribed about,
     a half dozen

     medications help ill
psyche, though nonetheless mill
yens of precious moments pill
furred with pro
     fuse sweating still
interferes supplementing,
     stoking, and socking

     away reserve till,
last creased furrow sought out
     here in Schwenksville
     Pennsylvania most likely, where
     one last gulp of oxygen will
finally deliver cremated ashes

     into eternal void
where psychological state
     free from being destroyed
and forever exempt trying
     to be write lee employed!
Posing As Dystopian Rant

This prognosticator doth predict
potential based at current rate
sinister debacle that will
instantaneously annihilate,
which alarming (ohm my dog) turbulent
endemic chaotic spate

within human race poised to strike
doom and generate
shock tummy once amp pull goldenlocks,
now revealing a shiny baldpate
erratic behavior attendant prescient
intimations presage apocalyptic fate

while current commander in chief
didst unwittingly generate,
and sow the seeds of anarchy sparking
global conflagration that will create
instantaneous prime evil
total mortal kombat, cuz "FAKE" mandate

issued, when Trump went ballistic
loose sing rockets red glare,
when pressing hot button to demonstrate
thermonuclear supremacy,
sans 3D printable bomb
(albeit a moot point),

would render superfluous need way to late
to draft intestate
last (or perchance first, second,
third...) will and testament, tete a tete
perhaps minuscule (nee
infinitesimal) ordnance out of date

turns out a Department of Defense dud
eh, no surprise as aye narrate
finding Don tremendously irate
(blaming "crooked Hillary," democrats,
spongebobsquarepants,...yours truly...)
the list goes on, thus no need to iterate,

thus a sudden religious fervor gripped
the wide webbed world
attributing why weapons did not actuate,
which found pontiff in high demand

in an attempt to accommodate
frenzied zeal attributing aborted blitzkrieg
to divine intervention with bajillion
talking heads airing where to dedicate
material trappings to indigent, great
full not dead, plus those petty

criminals rightly or wrongly,
the strong arm of
lanced law did incarcerate
bowed down on daily and nightly basis
exploding huzzahs every
human did *******

"not prematurely," where
all walks of life integrate,
a spontaneous international
utopian revelation awoke
with linkedin diversity to promulgate
protecting the planet took precedence
yea right Matthew Scott - dear mate
only in the context of this poem I did create.
231 · May 2019
And For Supper Tonight...
The Missus Prepared Her Trademark Tortilla Pizza

Hmm...yum...after a hard
days night of reading Hebrew,
though I do not know a word,
nonetheless taking leftist to right
correspondence course tubby guru

hoop fully coaxing posthumous fame and glory
detailing mundane epistles about this Matthew,
yours truly indulged in delicious comestible eschew
wing noncombustible vegetarian ingredients,
asper supp pur ream culinary

innovative eats, she whipped up anew
(similar how mine late mum did construe
tasty dishes to buzzfeed famished motley crew),
anyway thee wife comprised something new
microwaved cooked, (the stove off limits),

yet savory extemporaneous hodgepodge
usually delightful originating predicated on Jew
whoosh heritage, sans unpredictable menu
within fount tin head,
where earlier this evening she drew

forth, the above titled nonpareil zesty
substantial adequately satiating
me tummy, which uttered
(rather incoherently) halloo
since supercalifragilous expialidocious impossible
mission to verbalize

with full mouth, relishing anew
analogous when just a whippersnapper,
viz teenage mutant ninja turtle lapping stew
wickedly bubbling cauldron warming Inuits igloo
thawing this adventure seeker,

when a mere hatchling shew
wing fearlessness, I unwittingly got shell lacked
(became nearly homeless) sent askew
enroute rescued courtesy Mister Magoo
aforesaid Eskimos he knew

nursed me back to health
shaman donned as a "FAKE" kangaroo
accompanied by apprentice
trumpeting on Taj Mahal miniature didgeridoo,
which nostalgic "FAKE" memory
spouse poked das man
i.e., dozing papa awake asking review,

regarding Tortilla Pizza comprising:
whole wheat tortilla, dairy free vegan cheese
organic mild salsa
meatless crumbles
cubed eggplant.
should Trump swindle electorate by hook or crook,
(1003 days, 9 hours, and
32 minutes until 2024 election),
yours truly steels, girds, braces... himself,
and plots serious outlook
pondering exiting United States
(stage door left)
while streaming media services
bridging, fording, navigating...
modus operandi to brook

potential violent political malevolent maelstrom
in the offing since... Revolutionary War
finds nonestablishmentarian comfortably numb
currently sequestered within apartment unit b44.

Maybe good samaritan
would sponsor me
(affable wordsmith afflicted with anxiety)
and the loving wife,
I can imagine emigrating to the
second largest country in the world
on par with dying and being reborn
into idyllic and Edenic afterlife.

Lifelong Pennsylvania opportunistic resident
desirous to move away from capitalistic bust
mein kampf, a miserable existence
peppered, pockmarked, punctuated...
with adversity - subtracting instances
being exponentially nonplussed,
(which lifelong mental health
analogous to psychological rust)
leaves mine lovely bones in dog I trust

eventually repurposed into ash
(since I will choose cremation)
an increasing eco-friendly choice,
cuz burial with casket and tombstone clash
with holistic humble paradigm,
but before transitioning into lifeless body,
an impetuous notion arises, a flash
in the pan far fetched whim
to craft reasonable rhyme

communicating intent to live abroad
amidst one of ten provinces
and three territories
constituting Canadian federation,
which genuine motive not emblematic
of huckster nor fraud,
nevertheless one run of the mill
garden variety **** sapien flawed
yet he aims to dwell with citizens who applaud

voluntary simplicity likened and linkedin
belonging and hallmark characteristics
kickstarted intentional community,
where self sufficiency touted,
and physical labor de rigueur,
which lifestyle change
would rank as welcome adjustment
versus housed within Highland Manor
a quite reasonable single bedroom facility
yet devoid of stimulation
enervating body, mind spirit triage

of one ordinary human
who finds himself a mystery
within terrestrial firmament
and frequently feels in a feverish pitch
as tempus fugit whips
him around the sun
at a furious dizzying speed,
while he tenuously grips
with blistered hands
gripping sharp outcropping,
meanwhile his spindle shank legs splayed
and sprawled haphazardly across
the bombed out war zone.

Rather than get further
bogged down with inane zeal
I best steer clear of further poetic poppycock
courtesy imaginary wheel,
thus the following pablum I unveil
nsync with titled malady all to real,
which plight involves hyperhidrosis
quite a debilitating ordeal,

especially when thinking
to pursue gainful employment
emphatically steadfast
and honest think (me) leal
course this humble communicates
(hyperbolically) embodiment ideal
if seeking to gain insight how I feel
about myself, a tense body
inept to cartwheel.
229 · Aug 2018
Light Brainstorm Dust Hail
Ah haint goot
     no trade secret, boot verily
     attest adventitious, bounteous, and
     capacious divine intervention
     (analogous to invisible
     Charge of the Light Brigade)

     timely saving grace amaze
zing lee engorges,    
engirdles, and engenders mine
     body, mind and spirit,
     which psychic triage
     accruing, germinating,

     and manifesting forth
     coming, and appearing
     at the most opportune
     pluperfect kindling jawboning, and
     instagramming optimal instant – sparing
     irreparable cerebral damage,

     yet inflicting temporary
     temporal lobe trauma
     not surprising giving
     brain big bang, sans
     tickly totally tubular raise
zing trumpeting – analogous

     to Portuguese man-of-war
     sea render tyranny
     over fifty plus shades sways
undulating gray matter
     doth lightly secretely
     with naturally excreted

     unguent liberal mindedly braise,
which explanation might meet
     with skepticism, but craze
zee as such
     "FAKE" holy transcendent
     heavenly extra corporeal

     modus operandi may seem,
     an inexplicable force
     powerfully Herculean sensation
     grips me noggin leavening
     mental scratch pad in a daze
of blinding poetic inspiration doth
    
     like quaffing goblet
     of gin n tonic faze
this phenomena plays
a particularly puzzling role
     on account difficult to phrase
in light of my being an atheist,

which non deistic, theistic,
     nor Vedic precept stays
metaphorically locked, linkedin, and
     leveraged in place,
     despite nonreligious confession
     augmentation, attribution,

     and association
     showers inspiration, where
     eyes fixedly glaze
as literary creativity attaining
     high psychological grades
     dramatically engages fantastically

     with cosmic force appearing
     as nebulous haze
seems antithetical to premise
     couched, fixated, and interleaved
     anchor rightly, viz
     secular humanism inlays

     votary visa versa entrees
shutterfly, snapchat twitter
     comport comfortably seated
     as upon royal chaise
lounge steeped within
     monastic hermetically ascetic ways.
Fresh home from therapy,
     and resonate with zeal
**** air cerebral cogs a turn'n
     analogous to rack and pinion wheel

hence attempt made to bare soul,
     sans thru poetry re: veal
ling avidity, asper barreling neurological
     daily kos loaded truck full

     heading toward figurative
     lifelong landfill deposits
     on weekly ******
     logical session I unseal

manipulating bothersome issues
     controlled via bot size thumbwheel,
which grave undertaking i.e.
     professional counseling allows,

     enables, and provides opportunistic
     gradual process at selfheal
ling oft times necessitates
     reviewing silent Virgina reel

comprising the story
     of earlier life piecemeal
akin to a slapdash montage
     chronicling existential ordeal,

now referencing adenoids
     (removal first mention within
     poetic endeavor, when young boy)
     loosely linkedin with nasopharyngeal

pseudo oral palate
     highway tucking each meal
     across miniature bridgework,
     ma late mum meekly

     acceded to doctors orders,
     said operation sub
     sequently deemed unnecessary
affecting negligible decreasing nasality

     predicated on split (bifid
     or bifurcated uvula), viz laryngeal
utterances finds me speculating
     speculating now, whether taking kneel

ling pose possibly coo dove
     wrought divine intercession
giving me super powers ideal
for fighting off being bullied

     gloating this instant imagining
     bringing beastie boys to heel
actual reality visit my kid self,
     a most convenient scapegoat

socially withdraw puny size lad
internalizing hateful barbs glom
     ming up significant emotional gearwheel
inferiority complex predominating

     supplemented with cumulative
     anger, a potent feel
ling exacerbating anxiety prone disposition
     courtesy chromosomal
     (pop'n mom genes) art of the deal.
229 · Jan 2019
Interpreting Poetry (mine)
Similar to scrutinizing
an abstract painting,
this author begetting
obscure words dumbfounding
readers, he eludes
(no shade tree fore rest)
clear cut discerning,
yet oft times his words

garner reviews raving
esoteric word choice,
how mind boggling
to this logophile despite
more than one reading
brow (sir) furrowed -
cognitive region scrunching,
no matter intent concentration

utter futility attempting
bedeviled comprehension, whether
literary master (me? ha...
not yet), among pantheon partying,
but nonetheless birthing
present day profoundly thought provoking,
undoubtedly tirelessly expending
mental energy eventually exhausting

effort in futility understanding,
asper mine stymied
linkedin attention getting
(then just as quickly losing)
registering resignation defeat alluding
to challenge physical prowess daunting
engagement well matched savvy sparring
partner, or possibly life

and death battling
against unwittingly aggressive brutal questing
archenemy, sans toward all living
species wretched nemesis ultimately deciding
mortality tacitly accepted proffering
transient longevity refusing
to compromise, haggle, negotiate,
et cetera casting

deadened demise of victor or villain
all thru civilization starring
as unopposable tour
de force quietly biding
end date, versus indiscriminately snatching
hero, heroine, coward,
et cetera requiring
impossible ransom while donning

mask of Melpomene
(Tragedy), or trumpeting
Thalia (Comedy), no exit stage door left
only joie de vivre
until last second ticking
unbeknownst unexpected, and uninviting
deathly hallows ringtone alarming
anonymous (oh Henry)

words worth struggling
to hash meaningfulness, viz
finite existence germinating
since birth, yet
terminal realization pressing
with greater frequency when aging,
and deafeningly ear splitting
amplitude bite the bullet clamoring

to tread welcome matt acquiescing
unavoidable phase of dying
devoid of any bargain, but requiring
unconditionally punishingly suffering
silent non binding
resolution, no exemption decrying

unfair contractual obligation, nor unionizing
worth a fig yore of
speech as cosmic arbiter
blithely doth shear - pruning,
without rhyme nor reason meeting
identical fate toward everyone
even posthumous destiny yours truly awaiting.
228 · Oct 2018
I Cannot Weight To Hmm...
To Be Pressed By A Dumbbell
Two fifteen pound
     steely danse sing
     wrought iron dumbbells
     ill-tempered, impatiently,
     and intensely a weight
their turn to hmm... press me,
     and forthwith dense trait
heavy handed prestidigitation

     to yours truly, this primate
currently attempting
     to craft sad excuse
     for a poem, sans far fetched
     notion, aye trite re: late
engendering, foisting, and goading
     bizarre lifelike qualities
     to inanimate solid helpmate

to build (and/or oven
     just tone) muscles bitterly, painfully,
     resignedly wince, where washboard
     abdomen long a goner
     impossible to recoup,
     whar hide didst narrate
ting hours sculpting great
former Adonis build

     on these, now nada so lovely
     bones, and experience
     spiritual strife to oscillate,
     perhaps witness sing
     angst to esse skill late
heady feeling healthy vim within
     myself, how just
     with verily at least dedicate

half hour exercise can be great
for body, mind, and
     soul triage, otherwise...
     basic gravitational laws
     of physics gladly
     hand me unwanted fate,
how gradually physique
     will eventually demonstrate

flabby, droopy, and
     unwanted addy post tissue create
ting another reason to berate,
castigate, emasculate, where
     self repudiation will germinate
(albeit, thence in extremis), yours truly
     doth relinquish fitness regime
     resulting sparking, and taste

     testing casus belli dictate
tête-à-tête, viz hasty
     unconditional surrender to
     a void mortal kombat,
     which latter, would exterminate,
the forces of yin and yang,
     re: lee (I rub hurts) loch cur,
     thence finding me fraught,

     (yule hiss see - uselessly)
     grant ting soul
     option to disintegrate,
in the event emotional civil war,
rents asunder every fiber
     of mine being, which
    wrath wracked wraith self destruction
     twill woefully satiate.
(Me slippery fingers slither,
slip and slide splashing ala
Jackson *******), sans slap
dash experimental, swiftly

tailored and harried writing
style, yes on par with purging,
spewing, venting...unexpurgated,
unexpressed, unexplained...
words, which this Engelbert

Humperdinck singer/songwriter,
(whose name inexplicably popped
into the mind of this Dadaist)
offers "FAKE" apology for any

self inflicted, or sadomasochistic
flagellated cranial contusions
out of utter futility to make sense
regarding following gobbledygook!

GOOD LUCK!

Mine groovy palmar flexion creases
forever moistened by porous size
**** leaking levees provoking deluge
outranking Biblical flood - handy history
(in miniature) replete with Ark keel

logical artifacts discovered by hall n
oats marked wainwright - about 10 stone and
5 pound huckster, circa Fin de siècle,
when callous ten hooks (calisthenics,
eh) caught without Noah shadow of a

doubt proof positive by Matthew Scott,
(amat sure his surname) linkedin to storied
testament rivalling epic of Gilgamesh,
nee the entire spoilers alerts since
dawn of civilization writ small impossible

mission to decipher indelibly etched,
(what appear as Egyptian hieroglyphics),
methinks his perspiration contains
preservative agent, (a natural formaldehyde
like substance) generated nsync to maintain
eternal youthfulness, which stumps

medical community, and earned him
hashtagged "hotmail" (eagerly sought
after human commodity), a blessing
and curse palms plagued with chronic
wetness, yet lines (little flushed streams

of consciousness) rowed by itty bitty
teensy weensy merry daydreamers harkens
back when life held faint promise for
scattered (contra) bands of bipedal
hominids fiercely competing with trumpeting

(Taj Mahal sized) beasts (donned tousled
windswept hirsute trademark) Euclid
heir'm barreling along barren steppes
all around the one straggly mulberry bush,
where one pensive monkey (protohuman)
chased the weasel all around the world wide web.
228 · Aug 2019
ARGH! NO MORE MEDICARE!
A worst nightmare loomed large
notification courtesy Montgomery County
Assistance Office caseworker
implied medical coverage axed
I felt hammered, nailed, shingled out...
livid with rage
frenzied, harried, jarred...
railing away
fit tubby tied to train tracks
ready to **** myself!

Bajillion dollars for medications
yikes - anxiety/panic attacks
slated to return with vengeance,
no way to pay funeral/
cremation services

unable to calm down
a bottle of tranquilizers...
and/or sharp pointed objects
appeared very tempting
questions needed answering ASAP!

Telephone numbers yielded voice menu
dialed Consumer Service Center
for Health Coverage
at long last - thank dog,
a real person!

Whew - informed of short checklist
checking account transactions
backdated to June 2019
until most recent activity
slight sigh of wry tears relief

grace period until August 2019
accessed Citizens account online
of course Login fraught
with problematic issues Yow!

Chose new password
finally accessed anemic
measly anorexic balance
scrolled mouse pointer
highlighted/copied designated date
pasted said information
into Word document

ah...prints esse finally blessed me
folded half dozen plus pages
affixed three postage stamps
out apartment door
slipped material into onsight mailbox.

Breathed sigh of relief
agitation subsided within core
rage against human machine (me)
penuriousness smarted, vetted, yipped...
analogous to pet peeve

emotionally exhausted and spent
penniless poet plopped into bed
instant sleep refreshed
highly cooled figurative heels

subsequently resumed hashtagging
black and decker tooled mindset
concomitant with grievous bitterness
decried flagrantly mucking potential

squandered so many
prime vocational opportunities
severely compromised thank you
loathsome debilitating panic attacks
years gone by

voluntarily enrolled institutions,
albeit of higher learning
hopscotched from one college/
university after another
work historyrecord scattershot

unable to sustain employment
intermittent jobs between
prolonged gaps, deemed
expendable, replaceable, unmarketable...
great boost to self esteem
qualified to receive

Social Security disability
predicated on serious
mental health issues
to recapitulate incapacitated
presumably congenital aberration
other than above internal melee...,
I feel great?
(any resemblance between averred one laid
to rest and yours truly...purely coincidental
regarding unnamed person liberated
into heavenly glade!)

though innocently youthful looking air
at three score year,
or so the trumpeting "FAKE" mirrored reflection
(animated, sans Alexa) programmed tube lear
and spout, one most familiar Shakespeare
refrain (frequently misinterpreted) wherefore
art thou Romeo, really translates as
“Why did you have to be a Montague?”

no matter living to max,
I did not accrue
hoping to lyft mine uber last dying wish,
no matter body besotted, kissed,
and riddled with ague
spirit fights futile demise submerging
into bone a fied underworld brew,
any bargain exhausted with grim reaper

past hour to argue
lifelessness accorded ritual
traversing along deathly
other mortals traversed, paved,
and hallowed avenue
sudden agedness tolled
danse macabre league
with trumpeting battue

rigor mortis in toto
human flesh turned blue
oddly starved of wrinkles
thee only cherished clue
that perhaps...key expiration
coroner did misconstrue
bah...false alarm let somber retinue
solemnly proceed so poet can continue

pointless against corpse
dead letter diktat to counterargue,
nor against cosmic creator
can one countersue,
or expect miraculous success cue
wing sudden resurrection,
when biological processes
particularly brought to halt by dengue

fever, and rendering void
erroneous, unlikely mistaken
death sentence, hence sigh continue
and marvel quiet eternal repose
avails most pronounced distingue
lying in state (within coffin)
pulling out all shortstops
guaranteeing her/his endue

perhaps casket sealed with
decedent's favorite chiffon fondue
unsure what grim missing fate will ensue,
asper the (soul) surviving,
perhaps reincarnated within
commencement of fescue
as verdant leaves of
wit man ask grass

or if cremated...surely
spiritual embodiment freed thru flue
but no matter,
(je ne sais quois) glue
thee only I French I knew
before bidding dearly departed
may dog bless ye - adieu!
Oh flibbertigibbet
****, heil (Stuart Little) let mice
self down dagnabbit,
no matter this lactose intolerant,

conscientious, consumer and avowed kit
and caboodle - ***** vegetarian,
who lacked true grit,
cuz he craved a ham, rabbit

and cheese sandwich that hit
the bunny phone
spot (courtesy pit
tickle yule lee
     of The Daily Bread

Community Food Pantry sit
chew waited at 3938 Ridge Pike
    Collegeville, Pennsylvania 19426)
aye red deli admit
to fear with some darkly knit

shadow of a doubt reddit
lee, about being a boot
being smidgen afrit
of some powerful jinn crit
ture, demon, nor banshee

     making mincemeat out of me
     (Matthew Scott Harris),
whom now wants
to make quick exit
(and if fye sprouted

wings, would flit)
cuz, yours truly did coe vit
an insatiable app pit
tight carnivorous consumption
     where a craving awoke

like an addict hood needs a hit
ma tastebuds writhed with a bit
of minor seizure to let
me dentures bite to edit
mas exclusion of meat, and savor

     mouth watering satisfaction
as if masticating an illicit
substance, and all the while
     my awareness sans unethical
treatment of animals

went out figurative window
a disc credit
tummy sympathy for
     hogtied eggs eck rubble mitt
treatment steer

     ring agri business
to the mighty dollar,
     where die hard
slaughter houses will never quit!
A query one respondent
     sent didst seem
tummy tubby sincere, possibly
     channeled by cyber sea men,
via bayou A true Britt, aye esteem,
sans abba ra ca dab invoked
     by the spirit Jim Beam
     unwittingly unleashed theme

for this reason
     one humble rhyme
     stir, Me doth write,
     boot promise NOT TO SCREAM
for convenient idea
     to expound ream
(room) minute eight ting,
     about mine previous poem

     "Sleep Inducing Powers...
     Computer Screen"
     smote an idea,
     I could never outdream,
no need to search,

      cuz renown unknwn fan gave
     rise to his nonmainstream
re: "By the way, Matthew,
     "How do you like
     your Lenovo computer?"

Perhaps understandably
     concluded the whole green
kit and caboodle
     tubby a stand alone lean
(and few an proud) machine
sprung from Apple royalty,
     (well linkedin to
     a stevedore jobber seam

ming lee on same playing
     field as a queen
(comprising an A-1
     actor/ actress team)
with Ali MacGraw -
     his wife number deux
which thread strays
     **** sitter ably,

     where unsuspecting reader few
ming with for me (easily)
     getting off track -
     tis only hue
man and hoopfully NOT Jew
van aisle attempting to interweave
     more than one
     concept (delicately loo

ping sentence strands),
     where warp, and
     woof no...no...new
NOT for any
    largesse, nor moo
hoof fish hints,
     but singing Giacomo Antonio
     Domenico Michele

     Secondo Maria Poo
shin knee (the above
     very long name, actually
     authentic i.e. "NOT FAKE"
     a stand alone queue
oh...whoa yes..yes...
     yes please shew
tolerance, how elegiac

     these metaphors too
be compared with
     operatic flourishes I view
as vital breathtaking woo
wing chords nsync with Lenovo "sue

do" flatscreen (NOT A COMPUTER)
yet expanded field of you
alphanumeric characters
     in no way resembles Zulu!
Innocuously incubated kindled
imperceptible dire strait
restlessness like tinder
with pinterest Deutsche agitate
barreling like a freight
train running so much
faster than an eight
track uber twittering,

rumbling, quickening and inculcate
dissension among dissolute
rabble rousers, who
do obediently initiate
rank and file will not abate,
boot re:reed out (bus) soon,
thence coalesces into ablegate
insidious encroachments

no longer patiently await...
ideal conditions to hatch
schism within parched
soil perfect for hate
mongers of democracy
breeds anarchy to facilitate
chaos, which quickly spreads
like kudzu, or wildfire Arson

Welles immediately forcing leader
of free world to abnegate,
(heard to trumpet "FORGET
THE WALL" mate),
(despite being caught in his
pink frilly underwear), to late
for Mar a Lago escape, where
formerly great wealth did

pool lightly coagulate
elite class heard faint stir of echoes,
then earsplitting clangorous louder
than an ICBM din (er bell)
rent asunder forcing
freedom of "FAKE
MEDIA" to abdicate
all the while pointing beringed

index finger to accentuate
his Taj Mahal ululation
interspersed veni, vedi,
veci stopping for spate
to coif (died in the will)
hirsute and aerate
said wind swept hairdo
pausing every now and again to snap

selfie portraits, plus
instagram loved ones to alleviate
that pompous, outsize,
and humongous ego fast deflate
ting into a shriveled up POTUS
float hissing boilerplate

hot airy premature ejaculations,
he would not capitulate
(sooner be rocketed
to Pyongyang and cell bate
good times with Kim
Jong-un to emasculate!

I now absolve myself
that aforementioned jest,
a tongue in cheek diatribe belies
my means to predict any forecast,
yet if any resemblance

of chance events
materializes between
my pablum childishness at best
there could arise fruitful market
for kitsch sheen collectors items
high as Mount Everest!
226 · May 2018
Some Man Ticks
Aye haint gonna mention anyone by name,
     and *** myself poisoned
     with deadly tocsin, a most wick
kid demise act of vengeance cheap trick

boot Mayan tent to write this poem,
     a message came tummy mind rather quick,
and fuel a contrived rumor hoop fully
     spreading like wild fire
     from this nada so sainted Nick

juiced for pure sport and to kick
start and spellbind denunciatory, deprecatory,
     and derogatory unfounded slander
     toward one country bumpkin,

     who lives in the sticks of Hick
ville, and unfortunately
     shares the same body as me,
     an old curmudgeon full of (lix) spittle,
     with lovely bones that crick,

thus, while spur of the moment whim arose
     (take bull by the horns
     asthma late grammar used to say), aye chose
to hash out matter of fact playful verse,

     while ma doppelganger doth doze
and trump scathing "FAKE" news expose
zing ambivalent (nee loathsome)
     punishing sentiments ach'n ma heart

     with daggers of icy sin tax
     directed as rhetorical linguistic floes
vicariously experiencing euphoria,
     red hot poker glows

within the scabrous, tenebrous,
     and villainous haughty yahoo
an unprepossessing, quite,
     and nattering kooky human

     immune to voodoo
he **** sitters himself smug,
     throughout every single sinew

of his (and mine) corporeal essence
     directly descended
     from storied Machu Picchu of Peru
yet his (ah, and mine)
     suppressed genealogy branch

     also includes, an a meow
zing small percentage of Neanderthal Jew
evidenced by genetic test 23andme,
     which helps explain primate characteristic

     dragging (sic) hairy knuckles,
     where thick callouses grew
thus aye conclude
     (just in the nick of time

     as he who must not be mentioned) drew
a breath upon awakening
     from a nap bright tailed,
     and bushy eyed anew.
Das Don Auld (can hard tank
tucker son of Carl, and leave
landscape barren) calling out
rigged ken tuckered hoarfrost race,
viz demolition derby presaging

death to White Anglo Saxon
democracy DOMS (delayed
onset muscle soreness)
minions decry diplomacy,
crass denunciation of
Stacey Abrams

liberally Apple eyeing jingoistic rhetoric
declare defamation directly
upon disparate grass roots
hegemony, hectoring, heckling,
and harassing humble horse

sense, asper progressive
democrats holstering, hitching
vis a vis rays in the sky,
no fault in our stars,
harnessing healthy,

honesty, humility plowing,
sowing, and tilling political
terrain at expense tubby
damnably cruelly,
brutally, nagged, branded,

and whipped malevolently,
mercilessly, and mischievously
lambasted by fourth grade
vocabulary level commander
in chief exuding: haughtiness,

doughy bully pronouncing
prescriptions provisioning
one percent pampered
population attending one
tan man hat tin galavanting

ego inflating functions
exploiting downtrodden
under most class "dirt poor"
bilked proletariat segment.

Pinnacle (topping Taj Mahal),
now owns Birds eye
bourgeoisie view, which
informs hawkish word
smiths, onlookers with
powerfully pointed excel

lent access, sans zealous,
Vociferous, uxorious
tyrannical reigning Rex
less lee pugnacious noxious
loose xenophobic,
jabberwocky, demagoguery
laced jargon surly *******,

quizzically, pugilistic-allied,
outrageously punching
imaginary nemesis, linkedin
with instagram, snapchat
twittering skulking arch

conservative enemies
clandestinely undermining
(bone a fide skulduggery)
ambitions to turn back
figurative clock, applauding,
cobbling, count sole ling

commander in chief to
reboot, remake, and retry
to restore American (post
world war II) hit parade
soundtrack resonating

with ardent blatant
bigotry, colored blinders,
devilish foo fighting
patriotism, nepotism, localism,
gerrymandered, jury rigged
Russian hijacked pollster
precincts, nativism milking

titillating conspiracy theorists,
denouncing radical ambidextrous
righteous leftists, silencing
second amendment agent
challenges provocateurs,
lake woebegone raconteurs,

and saboteurs infiltrating
highest echelons with spooky
intelligent poseurs, and green
lighting one man plutocrat
steamrolling aborted blackened
civil disobedience (Thoreau Lee)
walled in reproductive rights.
Ford score and...Chevy
five years ago,
my Model A strapping
handsome big bro,
(who sped like one

speeding Triumph font lee, crow),
wing, & swooping Thunderbird, with
bold face observers whistling Geronimo
(Holy Jeep), this meant war
whooping Comanche
decked out as armadillo

kicking up red feathery colored dust devils
rivaling the fastest Alfa Romeo
(while choking, gagging, loo
sing russett sputum
flecked with true grit

mouthful size of Colorado)
easily mistaken for masked Zorro
speeding across rugged
terrain of Durango,
ah recall and reminisce,

and if cup ear just so
can still hear (albeit faintly),
a toy Yoda Echo
wing nsync with
Lake Woebegone prairie

home companion, the little known no
nonsense visiting drag queen racer
Noah N. Gin poe
cur face (born that way)
originally from Malibu, a beau

teaful Corvair with Corsair, now resembling
groveling growling Gremlin, in slow-mo
what with his Smashface
ugly enough to scare Apollo
the ghost of David Buick,

a poor entrepreneur, who
never did make good profit re: Coupe,
and could not Dodge nor shoo
away, the Stealth fearsome curse

of Aries nibble Viper moo
ving fast as greased lightning,
(whereby an Eagle Talon
flashed like Spitfire akin too
Austin-Healey Sprite)

full Caprice out of the
(sir really yon) blue
celestial vault outer limits, hue
mans avoided only
brave Caravan Voyager Goo Goo

Doll dared (only fools rushed in, ignoring Fiat,
where angels feared to tread), a Motley Crue
shielded with Fisker Karma (credit),
no matter last payments way overdue
sought out (with Escort

in tow) - actually two
yup, that ever elusive Holy Grail,
thus needed to Focus with much ado
about nothing, while
brows scrunched – mad as Jew
pitter by Zeus snorting like

angry red Taurus bulls - do
tee fully kicking up Tempo
like nobody's business ready
to serve their Mazda at heart,
a Legacy Sub (burr rue)  
tricked up as a gnu!
Of Hibernation To Rejoice Arrival Of Spring 2019

Accordingly, other than
meteorologists plenti schooled
ascertaining onset of temperate air
more particularly otter den non humans
unassumingly (ferreted out), who bear
the tidings, when that season

of rebirth dawns with crystal clear
blue skies, and terrain where deer
and antelope eagerly play without despair
purportedly realized, reassured, recounted...drear
re: days vamoosed foretold by
Punxsutawney Phil on Groundhog Day

February second - requires one
with acute hearing to ****, and ear
turnips tickling the nose nostrils
delicate hairs (instagram ideal outlook) subtly,
markedly, lively..., yet gently flair
soon harkening shrieks

of delightful analogous funfair
no stranger to Renaissance Faire
of pitch perfect gamesomeness
will seem as... otherworldly pleasant
ah heaven sent giftware,
where all creatures great and small

sing psalms, upon arrival when hardware
trappings of winter shucked witnessing
unrolled welcome Scottish matt so hare
and tortoise can race,
cuz vernal equinox, sports a linkedin
improvisational, ebulliently

educational, audiological...
twittering melange I will hear,
and grateful no defect doth impair
ability to revel silence, slake, soak...
insatiable thirst even prodding junketeer,
panhandler, vendor...

the last named, perhaps selling kitchenware
knicknacks, keepsakes...to hippies with longhair
interwoven with kahila
garden lily, laurel, maidenhair...
profusion of sensual delight
brings Mother Earth near,
the body, mind, and soul

espying frolicsome **** sapiens
donned with minimal outerwear
infusing all living things
even those pining
to answer call of the wild overdare
ring to bee zee lee court'n prepare

ring to beget young as
singular requisite quintessential profiteer
fluttering, instagramming emoji,
sans shutterfly puppeteer
as audience visually already reddit
regarding acting entire scenes,  

viz Biblical Genesis answering prayer
particularly if gnostic, heterodox, queer...,
finally relieved, sans polar vortex
albeit somewhat rare
atmospheric phenomena, how ideal
if said rabid Jack Frost

would sink icy bite - part
and parcel green gang ,
at much more favorably time reappear
during oppressive heat spell during
sweltering triple digits temperature
summer re: time of year.
(courtesy of tasseled colonel corny maise aye aire)

Challenge more difficult than threading
camel thru eye of needle, hence catchy title
scotched, and I aim to endeavor and steer
away from task surpassing
defying gravity clear,

nonetheless (sorry), I still hotly air
glomming pablum attesting ill
success while sitting
in this wooden hard backed chair
oft times a means to leap bajillion

miles, cuz yours truly doth despair
one composite primate being forged care
fully vis a vis from carbon based life
je ne sais quoi essence Earthenware
composed, whether flora or fauna,

one species, sans latter, whose fanfare
of self importance don, trumpet
white out blinding search lights glare
ring essentially making grist for mockery,
parody travesty, etc shady spectacle

buzzfeeding nothing of pinterest to hear
blabbering blaring blather most teeny
tiny in utero homunculus hazardous heir
to the porcelain throne
faulty genes impair

ability to reign reduced
to basket of deplorable
what, particularly as
one benighted longhair
pencil necked geek refused treatment,

(cuz preexisting condition) by medicare
not covered, thus accursed
imp of the pervert
resigned to toss in hat
unsuspecting nightmare,

and run for political office
touting offering nuclear
weapon to every man,
woman and child

additionally larding couture
to design outerwear
housing protective
missile deflecting capacity,
which article designed by

Penn students, yes a bit
elaborate what with
doodads, thingymajigs,
and whatchamacallits
they (especially Eden)

did amazingly overengineer,
but, what the hey, now
the prophesied armageddon
answered courtesy
oven entrepreneurial pair

two peas in a pod, which
success stories ain't queer,
where Ivy League University
flush with funds to bolster
any promising idea, yea
even full body pod suited rainwear.
Papa unexpectedly overtaken with woe
flashback shook me complex edifice
head, shoulder, knees in to toe
quietly processing silent film status quo
shant upended jollity
between when a little girl no
matter mine nonconformist
mien unconditionally accepted,

ye dear daughter(s) don't know
sudden onset of anguish **... **... **
holiday cavorting accentuated as
charade, facade, masquerade fueling ego
particularly Santa with the Misses,
and her sharp claws
keeping warm while
temperature five below.

No matter most every detail
I accurately gauge to attest
your life bustling
chock full o' zest
withheld, no doubt emotions
smolder within your chest

and kudos to thee lovely offspring
(both) packed bags
and headed out west
twas honorable duty, though now...
papa feels like
an unwanted guest
thee survived, albeit psyche bruised,

undergoing the electric
kool aid acid test
laughter when playing
Mancala, Uno, Sorry, et cetera,
how dada predictably did jest
when table turned,
I (spoiler alert)

willingly, lovingly, and blithely
lost desire to win quest
to dispose cards, game
pieces, and/or glass beads
invariably other occasions
ye long since left (as thee must)
me and mother with an empty nest.

Nothing more doth
Matthew Scott ask or desire
then to delight and bask
as well educated hire
swimmingly how thee
learned to acquire

confidence and multitasking,
while I trod thru much
psychological muck mire
oft times (like now)
experiencing financial straits dire,

linkedin to when only youngster fire
within me belly to joie de vivre
peter out and prematurely expire
and yours truly reckons nothing
can change the past aghast being

deprived a marshmallow
at long ago time sharing campfire
with shortcomings scalding,
killing, crimping relationship,
doth now conclude another poetic wire.
Explosions rocked Manchester Arena
   after finale of Ariana Grande concert
where just moment before avid fans
   of this idol did cavort and flirt
shattering poignant moments,
   when one than another attendant
   did amidst helter skelter yell and blurt
   now treasured musician forever linkedin with those killed or hurt
by Salman Abedi as Isis peck fist bumped the devil,
   gloated, and rejoiced while taking stock of the carnage
   wrought by sprayed scattershot shrapnel, he stood inert
   proud to witness handiwork and grievous fallen english dads
   children, and Bobbies armed to the teeth – on high alert
for suspect hell bent on wreaking heartache
   with swaths of bloodshed staining the dirt
many severely wounded requiring immediate intervention effort
and quick reflexive protectionist instincts
   rose to the fore buckling to save a life
   more precious than spun gold or jewelry coated gilt
prioritizing human bond, and appalled and those un-necessarily kilt
to appease fiendish, ghoulish and hellish primary business
   for mortician perhaps named milt
preparing the slaughtered victims –
   some draped in a comforting home made quilt
where veritable soul asylum family, friends and strangers tilt
their head down inconsolable sadness (as tragedy hits me hart)
   affecting an impulse to wilt

vis a vis
for such inexplicable wanton zealots to puncture potential peace
and slash societal fabric, which merely articulates greater violence
   a curse to render utmost loss terminated
   indiscriminately robbing kinfolk –
   perhaps and uncle, aunt, nephew or niece
more valued assets before natural termination of chronological lease
upon another casket with the Union jack
   folded atop adorned with flowers tucked inside a cease.
(alternately titled: yours truly doth mutter
asthma bowled dug gutter
pin yon hated chap strikingly and gently weeps,
whereby melts milquetoast like butter.)

Aye reckon eyes aforementioned
entitled microscopic organism
doth strain credulity threatening
**** sapiens left agog
stupefied, whereby mortality
of species existential crisis

pitted against unseen rapacious
(non public) enemy glow
bull diabolic scourge plaguing
world wide web humbling
**** sapiens arrogance,
bombast, ecocentrism... fueling

outrageous mortal kombat
concerning toilet tissue to stave
virulent pathogen wreak havoc
across webbed wide world
immune systems entire bajillion
complex edifices, (albeit -

biochemical, deoxyribonucleic,
fantastical, helical, Judaic/
Christian, liturgical, neuro
physiological, pathological, ollie
ollie oxen free radical, typical,
virological, xylographical -

zoogeographical aerodynamical,
critical, elliptical, genii
logical, ad nauseum) metaphorical
house of rising son straw knocked
(knick knack paddy whack...)
upside the head obliterating

(one fell swoop) - fast as
greased lightning defenceless ill
prepared immune systems
rendering bipedal hominids law
n gevity (courtesy hiphop wordsmith
Kanye West) basically

electric kool-aid acid test
corroborating, galvanizing, plus
liberating riotous yawping,
capitalistic, horrific, narcissistic...
aforementioned poetically
licensed entitled germ cells, yours

truly suspects Mike rowed
the boat ashore compromising rug
harding infecting taster's choice
mortal human flesh, a fancy
feast inferred courtesy
Sikh's six sense (mine), where spreads

trumpeting, kickstarting,
and hooting virulent
bugaboos flu - went
within ways and means of
contaminating, infecting, and
orchestrating pandemic veritable

microcosmic beastie boys foo
fighting (linkedin) twittering...
figuratively and literally bring
***** simians to their knees
(knobby in my case) maneuvering
offensive (salient parry and ******)

undermining physical health
among village people
(think - human league)
field day nabbed
(dagnabit) vulnerability, susceptibility,
and quintessentially awk

wiring advantageous edge,
whereby wreaking havoc across avast
global swath temporarily forcing
twenty first civilization braking
(fast) bringing living social
muckraking and mudslinging species

(envision) bajillion people suddenly
deprived of cherished helter
skelter hubbub devoid
(car own nah fiat issued without warning)
mandating swarming multitudes

against buzzfeeding capital one
good n plenti frenzied madcap
lifestyles necessitating, quickening
uber vicissitudes (zero sum game)
witnessed by level playing field.
Early in life worthlessness prevailed employ
ying gnawing, infecting thought processes
did more than annoy
rooted, short circuited, and tasered
flickr happiness lived

spontaneous bobbing sponging buoy
clinging to mother's
apron string series
of unfortunate events
conspired to destroy

that extremely introverted
shy locked lad, and somewhat coy
no matter bred from Jewish stock,
his existence he did not enjoy
he knew no more of Semitic heritage,

and for all intents and purposes,
said life devoid of joy,
now late in his life shill
still **** sitter himself a goy.

This corporeal body orbited sun
at woof lee light warp speed,
no mortal can outrun
decades spun ever
faster than speeding bullet

from most high powered gun
or analogous to none
other than miniature whirling dervish
gyroscopic combination dreidel won
dress lee resembling

dicey snake eyes on fire all fun
and games by expert
watergate burglar nixon
argh...burned his legacy
Gerald ford did pardon

can of worms best not open
infamous administration
equally as full of shame
as Trump shenanigans,
he need put in place
rather than blame,

thus someone must tame
perhaps yours truly - not as lame
as presumed, unless ye might be game
eldest sister of mine suggested to aim
site as political activist bandwagon and

thus ineluctably claim
feeling glad to right Dame
Liberty, now a mockery, I exclaim
where land of milk and honey
necessitates more apropos name
oh...of course a
suitable avatar and meme!
WE MUST DO MORE THAN YODEL LOUD:

out....out...get...ding **** donald drake...out...of...here...without...his...coat....of...armor!

i will NOT advocate, devote, nor generate je nais sais quois mandate plaudits
for that mane lion kapo - jabbering indiscretion!

Herewith follows a poem i dashed off in a huff - to douse
dat auld don trumpeting joie de vivre fin d siecle utopia of yesteryear
   puffin sewerage bilge - strike n horror n ma eyes -
   for opinion aye espouse
based on scary political fracas and looming nightmare -
   whar mo' will grouse
to obstruct trump access to black keys to white house
that a looming presidential nightmare
   doth not become real - gruff louse
he will crush sacred freedoms,
   whence western civilization goes off bluff
   analogous to a rabid cat terminating
   the life of more'n mickey mouse.

DUCK AFTER DUMP PING THE DON
air ring ma thoughts -
no matter aye ham
   juiced one twenty first century mwm ape
serves as genuine s cape
to fly (during pitch black hours of night)
on his witch a ma call it...
   to escape temporarily the cares and concerns
   of an uncertain world,
where as n outlier from the madding crowd i gape

at the sheer inanity
   trumpeting strumpets donning an innate
   prejudice and senselessness purr
   blind faith toward self avowed demigod –
   seize ***** viz Cesar
his hair coiffed and puffed like it whir
wind blown kickstart ting mobs to stir
paying bodyguards to evict ruckus-causing murmur
oh...how the masses will let this country

go to hell in hand basket
and rack up stratospheric global debt
cause zing this one measly mortal male to fret
that totalitarian rule will force every man,
woman and child to march....het
two...three...four, while the billionaire
turns a third blind eye speeds away in his foo fighter jet
argh...heavens to Betsy, how did the fickle finger of fate let
this pompous ***
   vacuums up majority votes across world wide net
to finagle vox populi, and groom hooligan nasty ruffian thugs
with smashed face s as his pet

long story short - pondering my rental circumstance
will be upended if this ret
chad, evil, googly-eyed, gastronomic, narcissistic bullish don will set
the spark for world war three -
unless....Katrina and the Waves, superman
   or the Sabrina can oust him yet!
heebie jeebies couple months before March 15th, 2020

More'n three hundred and sixty six days ago,
a pandemic did devastatingly blow
across the webbed wide world
dark shadows spelled glow
bull horror seeds of hell show
did terrify **** sapiens  
with unimaginable woe.

I revisited the following poem crafted last year
so little known about the when, why and where
concerning then Doomsday scenario unleashed
accept my humble apology if message unclear
giving reasonable rhyme details just threadbare

bard lacks scientific penchant I honestly swear
appalling attempt at writing trademark metered
poetic endeavor doth not lessen how ye revere
yours truly who would be amenable to answer
personal response, thus email me questionnaire.

Aye reckon eyes aforementioned microscopic organism
doth strain credulity threatening **** sapiens left agog
stupefied, whereby mortality of species existential crisis
pitted against unseen rapacious (non public) enemy glow

bull diabolic scourge plaguing world wide web humbling
**** sapiens arrogance, bombast, ecocentrism... fueling
outrageous mortal kombat concerning toilet tissue to stave
virulent pathogen wreak havoc across webbed wide world
immune systems entire bajillion complex edifices, (albeit -

biochemical, deoxyribonucleic, fantastical, helical, Judaic/
Christian, liturgical, neurophysiological, pathological, ollie
ollie oxen free radical, typical, virological, xylographical -
zoogeographical aerodynamical, critical, elliptical, genii
logical, ad nauseum) metaphorical house of straw knocked

(knick knack paddy whack...) upside the head obliterating
(one fell swoop) - fast as greased lightning defenceless ill
prepared immune systems rendering bipedal hominids law
n gevity (courtesy hiphop wordsmith Kanye West) basically
electric kool-aid acid test corroborating, galvanizing, plus

liberating riotous yawping, capitalistic, horrific, narcissistic...
aforementioned poetically licensed entitled germ cells, yours
truly suspects Mike rowed the boat ashore compromising rug
harding infecting taster's choice mortal human flesh, a fancy
feast inferred courtesy Sikh's six sense (mine), where spreads

trumpeting, kickstarting, and hooting virulent bugaboos flu -
went within ways and means of contaminating, infecting, and
orchestrating pandemic veritable microcosmic beastie boys foo
fighting (linkedin) twittering... figuratively and literally bring
***** simians to their knees (knobby in my case) maneuvering

offensive (salient parry and ******) undermining physical health
among village people (think - human league) field day nabbed
(dagnabit) vulnerability, susceptibility, and quintessentially awk
wiring advantageous edge, whereby wreaking havoc across avast
global swath temporarily forcing twenty first civilization braking

(fast) bringing living social muckraking and mudslinging species
(envision) bajillion people suddenly deprived of cherished helter
skelter hubbub devoid (car own nah fiat issued without warning)
mandating swarming multitudes against buzzfeeding capital one
good n plenti frenzied madcap lifestyles necessitating, quickening
uber vicissitudes (zero sum game) witnessed by level playing field.
223 · Jan 2019
Lavish Praise Not Sought
Painful self actualization
quickly brights to light
paltry reasons (with or
without rhyme) a desolate sight
within blinkered mindseye hindsight

grotesque grimace shocks with affright
desolate landscape
precipitated when airtight
vacuum sealed sequestered,
muckraked, furloughed...

which past existence now doth bite
back with a vengeance more agonizing
than any imaginable plight
feeble effort thru poetry
to portray psychological bombsight

cathartic, emetic, pathetic... ejection
minus (all gore rhythm)
red tattered torn flesh ala bullfight,
vigil held under
deathly hallowed candlelight
lack of living will ******* right

against autopsy, eh
scant material worth any copyright
deceased did request mourners
to revel in daylight
of life (l'chaim) delight

within simple pleasures downright
unfettered, yet respectful
of self and others fight
for peace with strong lanced arms,
yet...shy away from fistfight

while standing firm
on righteous ground,
versus passively taking flight
modestly acknowledge accomplishments,
sans reflection initial birthed floodlight
ideally rejoice asper positive contribution

within webbed, wide world despite
shortcomings vis a vis height
insight, might,... dismissing as trite
customary, healthy, quality traits
sustaining virtuous yeast

leavening kindled hindsight
carried into darkness of afterlife
soul asylum void of oblivion
analogous to eternal midnight,
where surviving kin begat,

viz biological millwright,
which sunny daughters
became darling lasses overnight
I ask do not weep, nor mourn,
neither heap exaggerated flattery, quite

upon the head of
this beastly boyish sight,
whose dying wish
expansive though slight

points to stopping for persons white
red, brown, black...since one's birth
until...final seconds usher
mortal into twilight!
222 · Aug 2018
GENESIS RESPLENDENT
Autumnal hint faintly tinges air
finding this mortal
     bewitched by blare
ring refulgent radiance,

      which quiets viz cheer
ring, harkening murmuring analogous,
     when Holiday carolers
     happily, gingerly, and

     festively doth declare
punctuating ethereal medium
     melodic equilibrium gently, ineluctably,
     and lightly dust flirtatiously

     kibitz, palpate, and tickle ear
projecting medicinal kissing effusion
     across world wide web
     primal beat linkedin within

     uber tinder shutterfly
     razzmatazz nature
     made renaissance faire,
which brilliant mid

    eve ville theme
     finds me shielding sensitive sight
     against blinding, glomming, and limning
     eye optic cull glare,

thus hands cupped
     visor like impinged
     whatsapp blinking instagram
     reduced vision bolsters hear

ring to increase decibel
(home on the) range
prodigious symphonic production
issuing verdant pastoral themes

billow and flow across terra firma
hallowed ground made sanctimonious  
immaculate mother earth conception
synchronized in symphony with terrestrial
fauna and flora, which life forms abound,
via natural laboratory called Mother Earth
especially at unseasonably

thermally, searingly scorching dawn
make offal spring tide, where multitudinous
existence  strain to avoid extinction
carving out figurative zoological niche

in kaleidoscope of pall luted colors
and funereal sounds galore
idyllic melodic musical sounds compete
against backdrop clanging din

artist palette of rainbow blended spectral views,
sickeningly sabatoged, smeared, and sullied
which unforgiving, twining,
and strangulating manifestations
vaporize, undermine, and traumatize
therapeutic potential restorative
natural environment damaged
ability becalm ming terrestrial sepsis

no longer assuage auditory and
visual sense pleasures respectively
serve as psychic balm against global threat
of life, liberty and happiness triage psalm

rampant forming diabolical deliberate deeds
bred deeply rooted soiled hatred
kudzu resistance asphyxiates human camaraderie
democratic state attacked with no qualm

malicious terroristic plots splatter
(Jackson ******* like) methodical map
blueprint leaves catastrophic trail of red
dire prognostications constitute doomsday scenario
no rocket scientist mentality requisite
grave misfortune writ large for all life.
Hobbit those characters who lived
within the realm
of John Ronald Reuel Tolkien
as far removed as
Union of Soviet Socialist Republics
upon squelched cusp of progressivism,
now most likely
experience bitterness at the autocracy
of Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin.

Impossible mission to believe
amidst audacity, atrocity, egocentricity,
ferocity, mendacity, rapacity, et cetera
former KGB intelligence officer currently
serving as President of Russia
total mortal kombat of Ukraine did conceive
author of these words doth grieve
needless wanton death and destruction
analogous to volcano that lays waste
to innocent lives indiscriminately
spews forth horror as fiery lava
belches forth instantaneously
devastating explosions heave
leveling great swaths landscape
Gaia retching liquid rock
rendering utter wasteland
entombed survivors cannot leave.

The older generation
most likely experienced taste of democracy
(or the closest approximation thereof)
as I (am American baby boomer)
felt wowed by revolutionary changes,
when Ronald Reagan
occupied the White House.

Permafrost of the cold war thawed
when Mikhail Sergeyevich Gorbachev
(a Russian: born 2 March 1931)
ranked as salutary Soviet statesman.

As eighth leader of Soviet Union,
he rang successful posts as follows:
General Secretary of Communist Party
Soviet Union from 1985 until 1991.

He headed country of sprawling Soviet state
from 1988 until 1991
Chairman of Presidium of Supreme Soviet
from 1988 to 1989,
Chairman of Supreme Soviet from 1989 to 1990,
and President of Soviet Union from 1990 to 1991.

Gorbachev was born in Stavropol Krai
into a peasant Ukrainian–Russian family knoll high
in his teens, operated combine harvesters
on collective farms as strapping guy.

He graduated from Moscow State University
in 1955 with a degree in law.

While at university, he joined Communist Party,
and soon became jaw
burr walk key i.e. very active mouthpiece per se.
In 1970, his near flawless
dossier a boon asper getting appointed
First Party Secretary drawing
salary of Stavropol Regional Committee,
First Secretary as “Chaw”

Bach ca qua Supreme Soviet in 1974,
and appointed as member of Politburo in 1979.

Within three years after death of Soviet leader
Leonid Brezhnev, following brief "interregna"
of Andropov and Chernenko, Gorbachev
elected general secretary chief
by Politburo in 1985.

Before reaching said post,
his bona fides occasioned bill leaf
As top dog name-dropped
in Western newspapers
as a likely next leader and reef
furred as barrier to manage
younger generation at top level.

Gorbachev's policies of glasnost ("openness")
and perestroika ("restructuring") and
his reorientation of Soviet
strategic aims contributed
to end Cold War.

Under a rustling brand
new program, the role
of Communist Party in governing
the state was removed demand
did via the constitution,
which inadvertently led to crisis-level
political instability fanned
surge of regional nationalist
and anti-communist activism
culminating in dissolution hand
of Soviet Union. Gorbachev
later expressed regret
for failure to save USSR, Mother land
though he insisted his policies not failures,
but rather vitally necessary reforms, miss man
aged, sabotaged and exploited by opportunists.

He was awarded the Otto Hahn
Peace Medal in 1989,
the Nobel Peace Prize in 1990
and Harvey Prize in 1992, plus un-cease
sing honorary doctorates from various universities.

In September 2008, Gorbachev vis
a vis, and business oligarch Alexander Lebedev
announced formation of Independent
Democratic Party of Russia,
and in May 2009 Gorbachev
announced that launch meant
to be imminent.

This third attempt Gorbachev
sought to establish a political party, rent
asunder from disparate competitors started
Social Democratic Party of Russia in tent
toward legitimacy dated 2001,
and Union of Social Democrats
in 2007 voice of the people to vent.
Ides simply referred to first new moon,
which usually fell between
the thirteenth and fifteenth day
of a given month.

Smithsonian Magazine history buff
Tom A. Frail
posted March 4, 2010 issue
url = https://www.smithsonianmag.com/
history/top-ten-reasons-to-beware-
the-ides-of-march-8664107/
top ten reasons to
beware the ides of march.

The following events all occurred
fifteenth of March
across span of millenniums.

One: Assassination of fifty five year old
Julius Caesar, 44 Before Common Era
Two thousand and sixty six years ago
conspirators led by Marcus Junius Brutus
stab dictator-for-life Julius Caesar
to death before the Roman senate.

Two: A Raid on Southern England,
1360 Anno Domini.
A French raiding party begins
a 48-hour spree of ****, pillage and ******
in southern England.

King Edward III interrupts
his own pillaging spree in France
to launch reprisals,
writes historian Barbara Tuchman,
“on discovering that the French
could act as viciously in his realm
as the English did in France.”

Three: Samoan Cyclone, 1889
A cyclone wrecks six warships—
three U.S., three German—
in the harbor at Apia, Samoa,
leaving more than 200 sailors dead.

(On the other hand,
the ships represented
each nation’s show of force
in a competition to see
who would annex Samoan islands;
the disaster averted a likely war.)

Four: Czar Nicholas II
abdicates his throne, 1917
Czar Nicholas II of Russia
signs his abdication papers,
ending a 304-year-old royal dynasty
and ushering in Bolshevik rule.

He and his family taken captive
and, in July 1918, executed
before a firing squad.

Five: Germany Occupies Czechoslovakia, 1939
Just six months after
Czechoslovak leaders ceded Sudetenland,
**** troops seize provinces
of Bohemia and Moravia,
effectively wiping Czechoslovakia
off the map.

Six: A Deadly Blizzard
on the Great Plains, 1941
A Saturday-night blizzard
strikes northern Great Plains,
leaving at least 60 people dead
in North Dakota and Minnesota
and six more
in Manitoba and Saskatchewan.

A light evening snow
did not deter people from going out—
“after all, Saturday night
meant time for socializing,”
Diane Boit of Hendrum, Minnesota,
would recall—but “suddenly
the wind switched,
and a rumbling sound
could be heard as
60 mile-an-hour winds
swept down out of the north.”

Seven: World Record Rainfall, 1952
Rain falls on Indian Ocean island
of La Réunion—and keeps falling,
hard enough to register world’s
most voluminous 24-hour rainfall: 73.62 inches.

Eight: CBS Cancels
the “Ed Sullivan Show,” 1971
Word leaks that CBS-TV  
cancelled “The Ed Sullivan Show”
after 23 years on the network,
which also dumped Red Skelton
and Jackie Gleason
in the preceding month.

A generation mourns.

Nine: Disappearing Ozone Layer, 1988
NASA reports the ozone layer
over Northern Hemisphere  
depleted three times faster than predicted.

Ten: A New Global Health Scare, 2003
After accumulating reports
of a mysterious respiratory disease
afflicting patients and healthcare workers
in China, Vietnam, Hong Kong,
Singapore and Canada,
the World Health Organization
issues a heightened global health alert.

The disease became famous
under the acronym SARS
(for Sudden Acute Respiratory Syndrome).

elemental forces of style at large
which indiscriminate merciless whims extant
ask Homer Simpson or Marge
g'head and even tap
a local, county, or state Sarge

gent on the shoulder, cuz
he or she would moost likely agree
that this Month predicated
on The Gregorian calendar me
didst axe Mister Google,
(who **** courtesy enough prithee)
to validate premise about
when Time Construct came a boot re:

(named after Pope Gregory XIII, who
introduced it in October fifteen eighty two)
from that date to present,
the most widely ant queue
test used civil calendar,
and when brand new
(involved approximately
0.002% correction knew
this margin of error in length
of Julian calendar year) allowing hue

man accurate measurement passage
as days, weeks, months...elapsed
unimportant to the average Joe,
(not quite five hundred years ago)
returning home on his emu
no matter the gender named Matthew

cuz this flightless fast-running bird dinned,
poe whit lorry yet (wannabe)
nose tubby directed related door sill finned
dog gone harassed primate hoo haint sinned
graced with surname Harris,
and gladly boasts being full of wind

which trivia finds this barred bard
(as iz his usual wont
i.e. digress sing
from primary col lord thread)

from initial intent, vis a vis,
how all life forms stretching
within the bounds of quisling
to an affable, convivial, and filial King
Crimson (reddit in the face),
yet knew everything like kin ace
that comprised tome base
comprise zing knowledge
booking (to chase
winter blues) at getaway
gracefully at Bedrock Cave
with proprietors of said place
Barney Rubble and Fred Flintstone
offered ample space
to discuss preparations to cope
with onset of infrequent roaring blizzard
(via ominous clouds that didst trace)

plus minimizing setbacks affecting
the then most advanced stone age
during wrathful outbursts from beige
flesh toned gabbing Goddess,
whose gentle giantess goodness,
one could gauge
which genteel manners evident
also asper her page
gave inside information,
how to batten down hatches
while tethered like a puppet
on the then much younger global stage.
really trolley train hard to keep track of patients

Eye tell ya we (spuds)
pulled up stakes after four yar
and zero scores ago living in Bryn Mawr
salutary heart and lungs figurative
storied Main Line Health medical network
latter part of June tooth thousand seventeen

approximately July first
same year bidding au revoir
bid good riddance account
to slumlord - hood did spat and spar
moved to Schwenksville, Pennsylvania
unsafe to ride bicycle without handlebar

economical, geographical, practical...
subjected by Grosse and Quade tyrannical czar
dom low income facilities housing
nattering nabobs of nihilism whose intellect subpar
candidates vetted by Jaclyn Geiger registrar
courtesy nepotism unexceptional manager

thanks be to her papa, she drives fancy car
unlike this pauper and the missus
limited to schlep near and not far
afforded by rattletrap motorcar,
no driving prohibitive number of miles,
crossing sketchy territory warning signs

picturing dangerous avatar,
(especially during inclement whee thar)
determining risk to forego
top manic kin Michelin
money grubbing cannibalistic
surgeon's earning equivalent silver star,

or comparable civilian rating touting specialists
while bonafide topnotch indivisible tailors swifty
stitch ink, viz tattoo back parlor shop whar
exemplary Patients Matter Always
buzzfeeding, inoculating, kickstarting...
healthy medical network,

hobnob, kibitz, schmooze...
drown lackluster lovelife at the bar
parting paramour with such sweet sorrows par
for the course during pouring rain how bizarre
necessitated our lucky find locating physicians
supreme nsync with Google high reviews

receiving, scoring, nabbing,
incorporating... truevalue re: vector and scalar,
we veteran trooper seasoned renters
luckily blessed chance
cost us pennies on the dinar
general bang for buck amazingly
found yours truly strumming his air guitar

pleasantly situated among picturesque poplar
resort within Skippack Village, a tourist
mecca for devout or
secular gourmandizing, earning
catering and acquiescing savoir
ole mighty faire Benjamin
legally tendering expensive bazaar.
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