~

I must

Deep within this pain is a light,
a tiny beacon of hope,
a candle flame flickering in the distance
Telling me that I must follow,
leaving the darkness that has shadowed me behind
where my broken heart can no longer find it

The first step is the hardest...
moving away from my desires, my dreams
Forgetting that there once was a flower
blooming in the garden of my mind,
so beautiful and fragrant...it was love

Even in its wilted state, faded colors,
it is hard to walk away
As each thorn rips at my skin
trying to hold me in place,
reminding me of what we once had
Those moments of mesmerizing bliss

But I must…I must,
reach for something else that waits
somewhere in my future
Unknown to me, hidden beyond my sight
Promises of hope, of happiness, of friendship
of love I need to find…sadly leaving you behind

Never once has a
dictionary defined this
infatuation,
adoration,
l  o  v   e.

~

Deep within my heart


Oh so weak, I lift you by delicate wings,
gently as to not smear the wonder
that does meet my eyes

Softly you rest in my hand,
exploring my skin,
the lines of my life, crooked and scarred

Tiny feet dance
tickling me with wonderful sonnets,
penned by nature herself

As if you can see
my intentions are pure,
for I long to bring you joy, which you bring me

A sweet fragrance on the wind
rhymes perfectly with your mesmerizing luminescent colors,
shimmering in the morning sun

Spread your wings my little friend
for I have planted you a garden
filled with the nectar which you desire

And I will sit and watch
silently as you float, happy and free
amongst the beauty that grows for only you

Deep within my heart

If only you knew
About how much pain I went through
Just to make you smile
Every once and a while

If only you knew
How much I wanted to leave
This desolate land but didn't
Because of you

If only you knew
About the noose manufactured
Out of every fiber in my heart
That gracefully swung

If only you knew
How much I loved you
Because you can't love yourself
Until you've loved somebody else

If only you knew
How much I miss you
Since you've gone off
With some other guy

If only you knew
That the heart-fiber noose
Wasn't meant to be alone
It needed someone too

If only you knew
How gracefully it swung
wrapped around
my neck

If only you knew**
That you were the only
One that could
Save *me

i know it's hopeless
but i still wish
you would come back
i miss you so much