It's five o clock here.
I will go drink a glass or two on the 27th floor and look out at the pretty cold town.
Then it's the bus to BrekFest and there's bands galore.
Who will I talk to, what will I run with?
Scissors!
Doing cartwheels!
Trying, tryyying.
Learning..... NOTHING!
Grooven moooven, spooonyo pretty peggy-o. That's all I wannaaaa dooooo.

Poems on
  graph paper
crumpled
in the bottom of  my
  backpack.

I write love to hear the V in my head.
And I love when I'm unwanting.
Unwanted I scowl and indulge for a while; too long then I say when's enough.
Take less; make room for my soul to grow inside.
Takes but two days then it's time to watch my pride.
Then I indulge anew, now for just long enough.
Things get so simple then, I can make the proper call.
Time then's an easy friend: God nods and simply says:
"You need to help someone, using courage son, be alert.
Hear are your ears back, hear the wrinkle, smooth it down.
When a good and proper Son, you become your reward.
Stay that way long enough I will send you your girl.
She will be very smart and the loveliest in the world.
But with every sweet reward you must become something more.
She's so good she's all you'll see at times but my Son, don't forget the rest.
Make time for everyone you know it's not fun to be left out.
Sail your jig so steadily, magnificent leave the sea to me."

For everyone lithe to represent you for your glory, we thank you.
We love to see beauty and hold it up like a picture to the sun.
Then we go dancing, we knock them out.
Peasants danced, poor little girls without a word said more with their grace than so many ristocrats spit out of fancy schools.
We were upset to learn we had to do a little work, but elated to discover we had ability.
Then sometimes it was just easy. My God I love easy.
And when we're lazin are we not just in our right place and we know it.
Perfect laziness and horizontal. Let your arm drop to the cool wood floor.

See you where there is nothing you make it everything.
Blame it on earthlings and get bored with breathing.
Fan out your plume for you're prettier than reading.
And oh how I love to see the words on the page.

You came down slowly our agony receding.
Watching you falling triumphant we cried out.
Yours truly great mist, mist of wind, bolder rain now.
Let us just another time try to call you by name.

Keep your eyes closed, we are blind tonight
You can sit on the floorboards,
where I've bled,
naked and dark with me.

"Where are you from?

"Me?"

"Yeah. Where are you from?"

"I'm not really sure. Somewhere. Where are you from?"

"Here. Well, I was born here. I don't want to be from here, though."

"Where would you rather be from if you don't want to be from here?"

"I don't know. Anywhere but, really. Maybe Alaska."

"Why Alaska?"

"Well, I don't know. I'm not sure. Well, you see, they have a month of darkness every year. Just complete darkness. Some people think it's miserable. I think I'd like it, though. That way everyone could be just as invisible as me, even if for only a month out of the year."

Do your parents love you?
Are you religious?
Do you love everyone except yourself?
Are people nice to you?

Swim into me, swivel in the air
your eyes are penchant stares
Try all you can,
let everything and everyone caress you
Let the cold wind blow
and the warm wind undress you.

"Do you know what you did wrong?"

"What I did wrong?"

"Yeah. What you did ******* wrong."

"I-I...I'm not sure."

"You have to be ******* kidding me."

"I tried my be-"

"Shut the **** up. Shut. The. ****. Up. If you want to be something, if you want to get ahead in life, then you can't rely on me, your mother, your friends, or anyone except you. You have to know that every decision is your own, and every consequence that comes along with each decision, is your own to handle. No one will help you, and no one needs to help you because it's not their responsibility. You handle your own ****, and you do better than your best. Perfection. If you aren't perfect, then you aren't anything."

Birds and flies swivel around my head
you sit under a tree with thorns in your hair
I say, "Hi."
You say, "Hi."
I sit next to you, and you don't get up.
You smile and say, "Where have you been?"

And death shall have no dominion?
Is that so much a hope rather than opinion?
Under the windings of the sea?
And if no air breezes by, for you and me?
And if the resolution of my lack of evolution keeps me free?
Is there any hope in harmony. Is there any hope in harmony.
Is there any hope in harmony. Is there any hope in being me.

"Dreams are dangerous, Josh. They're sedatives, not cures. Choose reality. Choose the bitter pill. Because whether you believe it or not, you will end up having it whether you're forced to take it or whether you choose to take it. No matter how much talent you think you have, no matter how much stubbornness that you mistake for ambition, you will be unable to attain your dreams."

"What if you're wrong?"

"What if I'm wrong? Well, let's see-"

"No. What if you're wrong? What if you say all this because of your personal experience. What if you believe all of that because your belief in yourself was stripped by those before you? You could have done something bigger, but you gave up on yourself. You could have been someone. You could have been happy, instead of what you are now. Don't take away the only thing I have just because you have nothing."


Fear is a deadly thing to bear witness to
The hollow spot in the wall,
the eyes staring at a coffee mug,
the words, "I promise."

Tear apart an inverted heart,
and disappear into reverse midnight
All alone with a telephone,
"You're still there, right?"
Dial-tone silence followed by
fist to wall violence
and to sit alone in a bathtub
crying
is a new form of living yet
dying

I can hear violins amidst the violence
And I can see your eyes in the dark
There will be hands shaking
To you, for without, every burn
that's been allowed,
a night to relieve
your weary mind from unkind
lovers, mothers, fathers, brothers
and a hope that you retrieve
yourself in the debris


"Why do you care so much?"

"Why do I care?"

"A better question would be: Why do you care about people so much?"

"Because there's more beauty than desolation in humanity, or at least I choose to believe so."


Sunset sonata
*** in empty beds, in empty heads
Our sweat is a stranger, just like you
and just like me
*** is like society
And we're so focused on ******* each other
no matter how badly it ******* hurts us in the process

This is the song of the handsome people
bleached white bones
dark red flesh
with wrinkles deep and old
as the desert.

Their arrows having disembarked
have faded into the
molten clay of the
mean-spirited earth.

Their heritage having been
habitually crushed with cause
for hatred has been
enveloped in peace and pride
and is cloaked in
dry hides.

Feathered in cold trails of tears
to match trails of aging
they have covered up their
misfortunes with song
and smoke.

Their rainbow carried by the wind
to some far-off pasture
rides on the backs of deer
and dead bison

to be consumed in smoke
and black flame.

So under under they clapped like thunder.
Rolled it over and dove around.
Picked up love and held it till it broke and splashed on their heads with a
           soft wet sound.
Drenched in jelly oozing warmth they licked their lips and spanked the
           season unforgiveness not forgotten they mash their fists til winter
           knows their name.
"Dread us winter take what's coming you're on time-out til we're famous
            not ambitious never stressing eat your veggies and blow your
            storm.
But not here no we're the North and you've been dried up stop your crying
            have fun south now count your blessings we'll talk later if you're
            game."
We've got dancing, we've got sunshine, drenched in jelly all the same.
Lick our lips cause we're relaxing how's it taste like raspberry chocolate?
They're not happy we'll be for them just like jelly not a crying shame.