Calling each other every hour is not love
Feeling the need to message each other on Facebook every five minutes is not love
Having to be with each other twenty four hours a day is not love
Getting mad at each other when you talk to someone other than each other is not love
Starting petty arguments with each other to gain attention from each other is not love
Keeping each other away from friends or family is not love
Having anxiety attacks when you don't see each other for an hour is not love
It's obsession with one another

I am more than crazy
I am ******* insane
The only reason why that is such a problem for you is because the fact that I am so different from you scares the hell out of you
If you stopped being a follower and be your own person
maybe
just maybe
people such as myself would not intimidate you so much

They say life is a book you write yourself.
Well the story I have so far deserves to be burned until every memory that has been documented explodes to pieces never to be traced again.

I WILL NOT worry about things that I cannot control. I am going to cherish every moment I spend with whoever wants to spend time with me because I know how fast people can just disappear without any warning. I WILL NOT waste time on people who do not want anything to do with me. I will focus on the people who actually want to see me. I WILL NOT feel bad for not having a boyfriend. I know that I DON'T need a man to be happy. I have my writing, my cat, my friends and my family to fill in any emptiness that I begin to feel. I WILL NOT punish myself for things I cannot control. I am going to let go of what needs to be let go of. I am going to smile even when things are bad because I know God has it all under control. I am going to just enjoy my life and have fun.

One thing I have learned about break ups is once you face the fact that the relationship is over, you free yourself from the denial that is actually causing you more pain than the break up itself.

Before you walk out that door
listen to what I have to say
Running away from your problems
will not make them go away
Before you do anything permanent
think about the choice you're making
Is it really worth losing your life?
Do you realize the risks you are taking?
Killing yourself will not make them shut up
they will just start picking on someone else
Be the hero in this situation
go get yourself some help
You are far too beautiful and talented
to be another statistic in a **** book
Before you do anything else
go to your mirror and have a look
In front of you is a girl
who has the power to save lives
You just need a little guidance
and reassurance that you will be alright
You are a walking miracle
in a world who has lost all hope
You are the light in someone's darkness
you are someone's melody in a music note
I know the pain you feel hurts
even breathing makes you tired
You have talents begging to be seen
you have an inner fire
I know you feel alone
but you are far from it
You need to let somebody in
to help you finish what you started
Please put down that razor
and let yourself cry
Do not be afraid to show your emotions
there is no reason to hide
You are nothing like the bullies say
you are someone unique
You have what it takes to change the world
just pick up your pen and write
Your words are somebody else's words
that are afraid to be said out loud
You have no reason to feel bad
you have every reason to be proud
You were given the gift of words
words are how a person explains what they feel
You know how to open a person up
you know how to help them heal
Your future is full of greatness
the choice is up to you
To choose life or choose death
what are you going to do?

Sorry you are no longer here. If only I could talk to you and let you know how much you really are loved. If only we were allowed do overs.  To take back words that I know hurt you. If only I could have that last phone call we had, only this time I would not hang up on you. If only I could talk to you again and be the friend I should have been. If only.