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Mackenzie Nov 2017
Today is a good day.
I don't want to die.
Dying... It's so interesting.
You end your life, end your suffering, end everything.
It's one thing you have control over in your life.
One thing you chose, you're not forced.
Dying ends the constant voices, the constant thinking, constant anxiety.
My joke of a life deserves to die. I want to be good, be the best, yet I don't work for it.
I'm lazy.
I'm a joke.
People think I'm good, a nice, smart, hardworking girl.
But they don't know me.
They aren't close, they don't know the inner workings of my mind.
I'm not smart. I'm not nice. I'm not hardworking.
If I die they'll know the real me.
I'm not brave, I can't live through it all. The thinking is too hard.
I'm a coward.
Sorry I can't live up to your expectations.
Wrote this in science instead of paying attention
Mackenzie May 2019
I feel like a body in a sea of people.
Invisible.
No one to know
No one knows.
Mackenzie May 2019
I feel like my chest is imploding
With all of the feelings I’m feeling
No one to talk to
No one who answers
Or at least who answers how they should
I want someone
Someone who will hold me
As I cry
Not someone who will tell me
That the way I see myself is wrong
I want them to silently listen
And instead of ‘correcting’ me
Just understand me.

— The End —