Today is a good day.
I don't want to die.
Dying... It's so interesting.
You end your life, end your suffering, end everything.
It's one thing you have control over in your life.
One thing you chose, you're not forced.
Dying ends the constant voices, the constant thinking, constant anxiety.
My joke of a life deserves to die. I want to be good, be the best, yet I don't work for it.
I'm lazy.
I'm a joke.
People think I'm good, a nice, smart, hardworking girl.
But they don't know me.
They aren't close, they don't know the inner workings of my mind.
I'm not smart. I'm not nice. I'm not hardworking.
If I die they'll know the real me.
I'm not brave, I can't live through it all. The thinking is too hard.
I'm a coward.
Sorry I can't live up to your expectations.