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clawing at my mind
memories that are not mine
implanted as a powerful seed
hunger for more fueled by greed
envisioning surreal landscapes, places never seen
only within an imagination exists a country so serene
for it is not this era that I breathe
rather a time when the land was cherished beneath
footsteps resound down a dusty, old road
I watch breathless while the sands of time erode
phasing into the future, a place where I do not belong
the strings in my mind strum a sad, mournful song
as these strange memories align
memories that are not mine
thoughts from another time
one in which by chance existence was a bit more peaceful
perhaps memories are just as deceitful
when they are not mine
I don't know if I believe in reincarnation but I question all and claim to know nothing.
Flesh between fabric,
Love between flesh.
Another flesh within your reach,
Not a flesh you call your own,
For they are alone
Waiting in your home.

While you were in your zone
your mind, clouded.
Confidence, boosted,
The latex, you used it,
But when you wake up
You find your essence ghosted.

Regret like a flood,
Drowns your eyes
every breath taken
Forms an inevitable sigh.

If all you have is one night,
an all-time friend
or a late night lover.

One night,
Fabricated pleasure takes physical form
Do you tell the one waiting,
Or protect them from harm.

One night,
With the reciprocated love you say you hold so close to your heart,
The one who forever longs to dance to your beat,
Do you risk the pain of being left in the street
or wait until the cracks open from beneath your feet.
"I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead;
I lift my lids and all is born again.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

The stars go waltzing out in blue and red,
And arbitrary blackness gallops in:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I dreamed that you bewitched me into bed
And sung me moon-struck, kissed me quite insane.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

God topples from the sky, hell's fires fade:
Exit seraphim and Satan's men:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I fancied you'd return the way you said,
But I grow old and I forget your name.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

I should have loved a thunderbird instead;
At least when spring comes they roar back again.
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)"
 Feb 2013 Mackenzie Rose Frank
M
Lord, I am not worthy to receive you.
But only say the words.
And I shall be healed?
What is your plan now, Oh, master in the sky?
What is the sense in this?
How much pain can one endure?
This is a different pain. Something I’m not familiar with.
Telling him I loved him, only to hear silence in return.
Isn’t ****** a crime?
I was almost certain it was.

I am meant to be alone.
I want no one by my side. None at all.
Arise once again my walls of steel.
Let the barbed wire crawl around.
The mere touch leaves a pin ***** of blood.
Don’t come near me.
Don’t touch me.
Don’t speak to me.
I am an island and no one is wanted here.
Turn away. And let me bask in my solitude

Rather than running from loneliness, I embrace it
Welcome it like I would a long lost friend
Nourish it like I would my soul
Learn its every inch, angle, and curve
Know it and know it well
Stay weary of others
Who look nice and pleasant, but under the facade,
Like a dose of poison

I desire no companionship, for I am unlovable.
I do not deserve love.
I should not possess it.
I should not own it.
I am unworthy to receive it
I tried to open the door to your heart
But you held it shut
And I do not know quite why you did
Which hurts

I wanted to peer inside you
Enter into your life and give you aid
Win you over and show you all was well
Make at least some sort of difference

But right now
It seems that I will not be

I hope it was not selfish
My desire to help you out
Though sometimes I fear it was
But still, I am not sure

I do not wish to again
Smash myself upon the rocks of repentance
Unless I need to

I know this for sure
That in my heart I hope, I desire
That I wanted this for you

So for now I will love
In whatever way I can
From outside the door I will show you I care
For you
Not just for me.

(theinkthatspeaks.blogspot.com)
If you saw me at a funeral would you hold my hand
if you saw me dancing would you come over and ask for a turn if I already had a man?
would you swim across a lake if you saw me on the beach
how far would you go to get me in your reach?
abandoned all alone, stuck in a castle, behind the gates of hell
would you embark on a quest for me if I sound the bell?
If you saw me falling through a dark abyss,
surrounded in pain, that will always exist
would you try to save me by pressing your lips into a kiss?
If you looked into my eyes would you  bear the same pain?
or would you walk away just like the rest and call me insane.
would you see the girl trying to get out
the endless heat causing my life drought
would you take one look, and walk to me
and stay side by side, and guarantee
you will make things better
Its 2am
Tuesday morning
I should be sleeping
But instead I'm curled up In bed
Feet high above my head
Smiling at the texts you've sent me

And an overwhelming warmth
Rushes over me
Like the sea kissing the shoreline
When I'm thinking of you
Your smile, golden brown eyes, durden-esque hair
The way your laughter fills the air

And when I'm with you
Really with you
That's when the fireworks inside my chest ignite
And with every kiss I'm left to decide
If I want to breathe
Or indulge myself a little more
Oh Valentine,
Sweet blushing bride.
I never can call you mine,
Not in this lifetime.
Taken away,
Never had a chance to stay.
One day you'll pay,
Maybe when you walk away in May.
You were my love,
Clearly sent from above.
My pierced and stained dove,
I fear it is me who has had enough.
She crept into my life,
Bearing her claws and holding a knife.
Took me to great heights,
In the dead of winter's nights.
Hasn't moved on,
Can't see the light of dawn.
She'll write all her sad songs,
Not knowing if she can even last too long.
Yet I wrap my arms around her,
Love my disease and my cure.
Keep close my beautiful saboteur,
And drink her bittersweet liquor.
Sappy blah blah blah love.

Still relevant, oh love. (9/2014)
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