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Mar 2023 · 98
I thought I knew love
- Mar 2023
I thought love was a positive result in a pregnancy kit, or those other three positive results we took to be sure we weren't dreaming.

And then I thought love was seeing you for the first time through an ultrasound machine. Love was then in black and white, and in the size of a rice grain. We could see your heart beating, it was fast, like you were excited to show us you were there.

And then I thought love was hearing your heartbeat for the first time, I still remember how it felt - it made everything real.

And then I thought love means vomiting in the middle of my commute, sacrificing all the junk I used to eat, and making sure I was healthy, so you could be healthy too.

And then I thought love was seeing you grow through a series of check-ups, seeing you become like I am.

And then I thought love was waking up to your kicks in the middle of the night, or feeling your hiccups, or seeing my belly move from one side to the other, letting me know that you are coming.

And then I thought love was counting the months, weeks, days to finally seeing you.

And then I thought love was getting excited to be induced which means more medical intervention, but also means that I'll be seeing you soon.

And then I thought love was getting through labor. I didn't even know how many hours has passed, every contraction was worth it.

And then I thought love was pushing for hours to deliver you in this world. I felt like a failure when I couldn't deliver you after three hours. I was ready to see you, but I guess I wasn't strong enough.

And then I thought love was opting for surgery to get you out. I chose to be awake for the whole process just to hear you cry.

And then I thought love was when I first heard you cry. I could not hold my tears, you made all the pain worth it.

And then I thought love was when I first held you in my arms, you were 7.1lbs and 52cm. You look like just your father.

And then I thought love was when we spent our first night home, you kept us awake, but I didn't care.

And then I thought love was being able to finally breastfeed you. I took every piece of advice there is to make sure I have enough supply. There were a lot of things that didn't come my way when I was delivering you, so I want this one thing to work for us both.

And then I thought love was this and love was that, but everytime I feel like I knew what love was, I feel an even greater love each time I look at you.

And even as I write this - looking at your right now sleeping on my tummy.. I feel an even greater love for you right now more than I felt when I started writing.

I love you, little one.
Dec 2022 · 493
Little Bean
- Dec 2022
I haven't met you yet,
But I will live for you
30 weeks
Nov 2021 · 545
Reflection
- Nov 2021
Every poem written
Is a reflection of who you are today

So tell me,
Do you like what you see?
Oct 2021 · 113
Untitled
- Oct 2021
You are made by the same hands that made the stars, the moon, and the earth. How dare I compare you to something only a man created - you are not just art, you are something more than that.
Aug 2021 · 110
Untitled
- Aug 2021
Fate, destiny, kismet -- however you call it. It stilll ends up with making a choice.
Jul 2021 · 1.4k
Free
- Jul 2021
You are a piece of art
that doesn't belong to anyone

No museum can cage you
Jul 2021 · 1.3k
Dear poet,
- Jul 2021
Thank you for making me feel.

Sometimes I feel like every poem is about me. I feel you - the love, the pain, the longing; so keep on writing.

To feel is to live.
Jun 2021 · 673
Untitled
- Jun 2021
My soul is like a garden -
some parts are full of flowers
some parts are full of weeds
Dec 2020 · 143
Silence
- Dec 2020
But this time,
It's comfortable
It's not defeaning
It's calm

I believe this is peace.
May 2020 · 151
"I do."
- May 2020
Everything that kept me awake most nights no longer bother me, all the white noise I kept hearing was gone.

They were right, it is so much harder to write about things you cannot relate to - I can no longer write poems about longing and melancholy.

This is what it feels like to be a writer who has already been healed.

I am happy.
Sep 2019 · 172
Today
- Sep 2019
I thank God I am alive.
Nov 2018 · 723
Isolated
- Nov 2018
I don't mind being alone
I just hate being lonely
Nov 2018 · 185
*
- Nov 2018
*
"I am more than my anxiety."

"I am more than my anxiety."

"I am always enough."

Say it louder for the monsters at the back of your mind.
- Jun 2018
it's either you hurt the people who are closest to you,
or they hurt you

but the funny part is
most of the time
you just hurt yourself
Jun 2018 · 1.9k
**
- Jun 2018
**
I hope we are all
more than who we
thought we  are
Jun 2018 · 366
My Heart is Full
- Jun 2018
If this is all the love I’ll ever know, if this is all the love I’ll ever get.. I’m content.
- May 2018
And here we are,
surrounded by too many poems;
already too familiar
with what it's like to be a poet
that had his heart broken...

tell me,
I wanna know..
*what it's like to be a poet who has already been healed?
May 2018 · 237
Reminder
- May 2018
Hold your head up, love
The waves, they crash
The raindrops fall
It’s okay for you to stumble
Yet the tides rest
The storm ends
Get on your feet,
do your best
Apr 2018 · 433
Untitled
- Apr 2018
anxiety
Mar 2018 · 258
Untitled
- Mar 2018
You deserve all the good things this life can offer.

I don’t think I’m one of them.
I’m no good thing.
Mar 2018 · 217
Untitled
- Mar 2018
Aren’t you glad that no matter how many times you asked the stars to take you away, they didn’t?
Mar 2018 · 572
To every petal there is:
- Mar 2018
I am but a piece of flower, almost withered, never having seen the sun. And there she was, a tulip, never opening up to anyone. Then there were some that come in groups, like orchids - every color there is. My mom and her friends, a bouquet of sunflowers, always looking up the sun. Partners and colleagues, daisies and stargazers. And every other girl you come across with, angel’s breath, roses, lilies and dahlia.

A planet full of women is a garden.
Happy Women’s Day!
Mar 2018 · 278
Untitled
- Mar 2018
You told me the stars shine for me
but that night was the darkest,
there were no stars

that was the night I figured
I don’t need the stars,
I can shine, too
Feb 2018 · 268
Saved
- Feb 2018
Always wanting to be found
Been wishing to saved
Even if deep in your heart you knew
The only person that could save you
Is you
Jan 2018 · 227
Untitled
- Jan 2018
The halo lifts,
the wings crumble,
the angel leaves,
runs, and never stumble.

She cannot save you.
Jan 2018 · 463
O’clock
- Jan 2018
My watched stopped ticking the day we met again, and I swear I could hear your heartbeat even from meters away. How long has it been? God, I missed your face. I almost forgot how beautiful you were. You were even more beautiful than the day I lost you.

Time stood still
I stepped closer.
I reached for a hug,
...you let me.

My broken watch was the closest to forever I could ever be. Your heartbeat was the closest to heaven I would ever be.
Oct 2017 · 342
Evermore
- Oct 2017
‘Til death do you part
And yet even after that

She waits for you to come home every night
Oct 2017 · 515
Untitled
- Oct 2017
Funny how we're so scared about the future when tomorrow is not even guaranteed.
Oct 2017 · 268
Untitled
- Oct 2017
A ceramic vase shattered in front of her eyes, she was not the one at fault, but she fixes it anyway.

Now at 18, a boy’s heart is shattered and he's now in front of her, she was not the one who broke the boy’s heart, but she fixes him anyway.
Sep 2017 · 410
Untitled
- Sep 2017
And I am the hypocrite
who swore to protect you
with everything I am
just to see my sword
piercing through your heart

I am the angel
that caused your death
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