I think I’m afraid of letting go...

Sometimes there are days where I feel like Atlas,
Carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders.

Sometimes there are days where I can feel every single little thing,
Every touch and every emotion.

Sometimes there are days where I don't want to live anymore,
For at that time nothing seems possible.

Sometimes there are days where I just I need to be alone,
And sit at the edge on the rooftop of an old building overlooking the city.

Sometimes there are days where I feel lonely,
Like the entire world is against me.

Sometimes there are days like these,
Days that the only thing I can feel is the burning sensation of a blade being dragged across my skin.

I don't know what's wrong with me.

I feel..off, like I'm watching reality from a distance.

I feel...empty, like I've been drained of all life.

I feel...anger, like someone did something very wrong to me.

I feel...pain, like someone stabbed me with needles repeatedly.

I feel...tired, like I haven't had a drop of shut eye in my 17 years of existence.

I feel...not myself, like someone cut a piece of me out.

And I don't know what's wrong with me.
And that scares me

I really like staying up,
Because for once
It feels as though the world stops for a few hours.