Take my hand and lead me through
The halls that we once walked
However, I find it hard to approach you
After what happened in our last talk

I'm there again, in that gym
Like, once more, I'm in eight grade
You're doing what you do best
While I'm stuck standing there and afraid

The music is on, playing numb melodies
I should probably start to move
But how I can  bring myself to dance
When I'm hypnotized by you?

It felt like eight grade all over again
But reality followed me into this dream
Because I'm older than I used to be
And someone else had followed me

He wasn't there in presence
But he was floating over the dream
He's the reason I feel guilty
For what I see when I'm asleep

You notice me once and look away
Because you are still hurt by me
But little by little you look again
Then keep a gaze steadily

Nervously, I walk over to you
And ask if we could talk
So you said, still unknowingly
"Sure, I guess we could take a walk"

We walk across the dance floor
To a bench in the corner of the place
Where we talk about feelings and dreams
As a familiar smile spread across your face

Little by little, fingers inched across separate oceans
Our hands got closer still
Until they intertwined within in each other
And ignited the feelings we thought we killed

Eventually, we got up from that bench
To roam throughout our old school
With my head on your shoulder we walked around
Remembering places that we knew

"Remember that time we had tech-ed there together?"
I said in that hallways as I reminisced
"I remember" you said
"But, since then, it is really you that I have missed"

After that, we walked some more and sat together
It was so tangible, it felt like it was true
I could hear, see, touch, and think
Once again, I could feel things for you

But that is the cruelty of my dreams
Everything is so realistic
It feels like life until I wake up suddenly
Alone in my bed and nostalgic

Even if all the signs point to no
Everyone tells me to let it go
Even if it's written in the skies
Or it's ridden with goodbyes
If it's separated by space
If it's in an unfamiliar place
Even if our love was never true
I still can't forget you

I JUST ALWAYS FELT SO*   *small   **COMPARED TO YOU

The tree house, the swings, the memories
You built it, and you need to tear it down
To make way for a new pool deck
But by you tearing it down
You're just reassuring me of the fact
That my childhood has almost past
I remember so many times being up there
Sleeping up there
Doing homework
Swinging
Rolling around in sleeping bags
Laughing and enjoying life
I would rather it not go
I love its presence, always reminding me
That however old I get, there is always magic
There is some place to go and hide
Even if there are bees, I could still go up there and escape
I could sit, all bundled up in my Eskimo snow suit in winter
And witness the stillness of the new fallen snow
I whittled names into its support wood
So it would always remember
I guess I'm being selfish not wanting to share my own piece of childhood
But we all have that thing that we don't want to give up
Even if we outgrow it in a sense
But I will be happy in the sense that another child may climb up on the steps
Look out from the top and imagine they are the top of the world
For all the time that they can

We're too young, we were so serious
What happened?
Like Romeo and Juliet
Someone's going to die here
But I have realized something
If you don't drink the poison
I won't have to stab myself with a daggar

My petals have all been picked off, my strings have been pulled taught
By constant "He Loves Me's" and "He Loves Me Nots"
Can't you see, you've left me in distress?
But, "It Doesn't Matter," seems to be how you digress

Three weeks ago you were telling her how much you missed her at 4am. It must have been the alcohol...because you have avoided her ever since. The amount of texts she sends to you with no reply is almost embarrassing, but more than that it's painful-your silence screams volumes in her ears.

It was her birthday three days ago...and you said nothing. As the sun began to set her heart began to drop when she realized the one "happy birthday" she was waiting for never came. And that's when she knew it was over. You've let her down multiple times...but never quiet like this.

You destroyed the one person who would drop everything for you, who fought for you and loved you with all honesty.

So, she confused a lesson for a soulmate and because of that she is broken...but not beyond repair. You see time and Jesus will heal her soon enough. And when she's too busy enjoying the simple beauties and marveling at what it means to be alive-someone will walk into her life. Someone who will protect and cherish her heart instead of use it for selfish gain.

The storm you set on her is now a light drizzle...and soon you will be nothing but a mist

She will wake up one day and the memories won't haunt her, because now she is strong enough to finally put the past in the past. And all you will be is a distant memory with a lesson learned, and you will lose all power you ever had over her.