I don't want to think about us just being friends
We've never been that before
You're making all of the same jokes as you always did
But they're different,
Tainted by those words,
Or maybe I was just blinded by you,
A bit too much involved
Though it was always you
Who seemed more enthusiastic.

It's not that I wasn't,
I just didn't know how to show it,
And just as I began to learn,
You ended it.

It wasn't a long relationship,
But I meant it when I said
That looking into your eyes
Felt like home,
Felt like I could see everything
I'd ever want or need to see
And that was sufficient.

I can keep telling myself that I don't need you,
I can and will go on just fine,
You weren't the only thing in my life,
But you sure as hell made everything
Seem ten times better.

She asked me
If we would ever get back together
And I'm not going to lie,
I still dream of your kisses,
Your lips against mine,
Of lying in your arms
Feeling your chest drag
Heavily up and down
My heart beat in time with yours,
But I don't think I could.

I know you're right
When you say it was getting too much,
A week every couple of months
Isn't enough for either of us,
And soon I'll be at the other end of the country,
Maybe even the world
And it would only get harder.

But those weeks,
Sporadic as they were,
Felt as though they could make everything right
That even if forever isn't real,
We could last a **** long time.

Maybe I was mistaken,
And maybe it's naive
To think I could give this another chance.

When I said I didn't need the idea of you,
Well, maybe I was wrong,
I'm not sure anymore
On either account
Because either way, you're gone.

They've told me we can still be friends,
I don't know how many times you've said it,
But right now I don't know if I can.
My heart still drops to the floor at the sound of your name
And my stomach spins when I realise you're no longer mine.

I wanted to make sure you didn't think I hate you,
Because it's the direct opposite of that,
But it felt like everything was normal
Until you said goodbye,
And then a second wave of hurt knocked me back
And I almost let myself get swept away.

I don't know if it's you I need,
Or the idea of you,
Because now all of a sudden,
Everything feels a lot scarier,
And all of the changes feel so big
That they could overwhelm me completely,
Swallowing me up,
Reducing me to a speck of dust.

This is all too much for me,
And though I'm not alone,
You've left a space in my life
I don't think anyone else can fill,
Which begs the question,
Is it really you I need,
Or did I just like the idea of you?

Take my hand
Take my hand
Don't fall down to
Your neverland

You're falling and you'll
Never land
So take my hand
Not neverland

We'll make it grand!
Completely grand
So take my hand
Take my hand

walking
she folds
with an objective
smile
sticking
hoping they would stop
her hips
are peepholes
climbing without reason
smokeless skies
a clear day
sheltered in our terrain
torn asunder
with
an abstract rejection
of chemistry

There are two parts of me
One's a daydreaming little kid
Sitting on his ***
With an empty notebook
And a box of colored pencils
The other is a mean, bitter, cynical,
Angry grown up with a mustache
But **** does he get things done
As he drags the little kid
Along behind him
By the collar of his shirt

I walked into the dark cafe,
or was it bar?
thick with smoke, blood and confidence,
you could only see so far,
but I could see angst looking at their glass,
and nostalgia was dazed,
stuck thinking aboot yesterdays,
forever searching through a maze,
with no exit,
sadness is sitting with anxiety,
in between silences they talk aboot society,
while happiness tells me to smile,
with a certain style,
I tell them I need a beer,
or was it a coffee?
I do smile.
Anger comes up and tries to start a fight,
but redemption feeling the need to do right,
breaks it up,
To much noise and a black eye,
I say with a smiling sigh,
Time to write.