do you see me?
transparent but still two-toned.
conviction served with a side of dripping doubt.  

I hear your voice fill up the hallway.
3 years later and I realize
I missed it the entire time.
like a song I forgot I liked.
Always loud but indifferent
you exchange hollow hugs
and I check my hair in the bathroom mirror.

smile 1
no smile 2
no smile 1
Calculated Coquetry.  

oh.
you look the same.
but sexier.
Tinged by tribulations I don’t yet know.
I feel curious
and alone.

I wish
I’d worn
a different shirt.
My underarms bleed
evidence of insufficient accolades.
Tiny knots of bright red fabric
build beneath my body’s brutal bane  

A brief moment of exuberance.
but could this instant just be fraudulent?
I swear to god you hugged me longer
held me tighter
heard my hunger.

did you see me?
open-ended and unwritten.
T’d up to be submissive.

It took two nights
& endless drinks.
An elongated walk
& high school tricks.

1 year since 3 ago.
I sigh and contemplate your
shaky hands on the zipper of my favorite jeans
your ***** sheets and desperate pleas.
Who was I kidding?
undo my blouse and strip me bare.
I always liked this song.

If I lay in
than I wake out,
and feel my body stretch.
there’s gorilla glue
beneath my shoe
that holy air can’t edge.

it’s half past 6
2 ***** days
tag closer to my head.
“The moons been hot
but you are not”
the cocktail waitress said.

Unleash the beast
And sic the dogs
to recovery what’s been lost.
but hide the rug!
that filthy smudge!
my mother will be cross...

Pour one down.
Or is it out?
Just get it in the glass!
It’s almost noon
there isn’t room,
to think about the past.

Go outstairs,
no come downside,
and pull me through thick time.
Your cover’s blown,
I’m still alone.
Desperation is a crime.

The vaudeville
is passing still,
and Buck will meet us there.
Oh, don’t wait up!
I’ve had enough,
I’m lighter than the air…

Yesterday I learned,
you just don’t shoot yourself in the temple if you wanna die.
Small bits of exploded alloy
may merely knick the complex nerves
that control your eyes.  
You’ll be left blind but still alive.

A tough break for the enterprising.
Sometimes even the well prepared
come up short.

Although,
a quick google search would reveal
the proper path to panacea.

A redirect to the bombastic blog.
Empty words form empty lines.
And a single sign would have changed your mind,

Aim through the mouth.
It’s the only way.

Why is it
Boys can’t hula-hoop?
And have you ever
seen them try?
They concentrate real hard an all
but just can’t make
that hoop fly.
They all have this notion
to spin that ring real fast,
thinking if they hope
the spinning motion’ll last.
The beads inside just rattle.
With no smoothness to the sound.
They bounce around on boys’ hips
then smack against the ground.
And maybe it’s because
they have a bulge within their pants
that gets caught up on the hula-hoop
so boys just simply can’t.

My father needed
very few things
to stay content.

A pack of cigarettes
and her quick wit
to smoke them with

He found her in med school
Ironic,
where he won her over
with peppermint sticks.

His candy
and hers
Both balanced between
their lips.

It went like this
for 20 years
He’d smoke
She’d laugh.

But his work
left her alone
and in time her,
sweet tooth died.

So she left him.
alone with his worthless
Cigerettes.