the killing to make our revenge noted



you see these poor people heard my mates words

and now, i haven’t heard of my mate since

you see i think that people have taken out their revenge

and sent them through to hell or heaven

i don’t know it for sure

but i can surely guarantee that my mate has been killed and bloodened to death

just because he expressed an opinion

i haven’t seen him since one day

and i haven’t seen the homeless man either

i don’t want to be turned off helping the homeless find homes, no way, no fear

you see the other day, a crazy man tried to walk me to the shops

i implied that i didn’t want to do this, so i ended it with have a nice day

you see have a nice day is better to say than *******

i know people get fucken annoyed with that, but still it’s better

i would prefer if the hawker shops allow him to be there

they will keep him under wraps

but i haven’t seen my mate for ages, and if he is dead, i know to think

that keeping your mouth from saying bad stuff is the best solution

you see it’s nearly halloween, and i aqm getting visions of all my old school mates

being killed for voicing their opinions

i don’t want to suffer with the poor, but i don’t want to agree with the rich either

i certainly don’t want to sit on the fence, that is what losers do

i have my opinions, i should have a voice, and i should be heard

if i believe i was kidnapped in my last 2 previous lives that is my answer

if i believe that mentally ill people smell funny because they can’t be bothered washing themselves

well, it maybe isn’t really their fault

i miss this bloke, who i used to talk to around hawker, has he been killed

because i really voiced his opinion a lot, and that could get him in trouble

i hate being treated like a bad smell, i am a 46 year old young dude

i’m a happy dude, and i hear angry dudes in my head

which really drives me crazy crazy crazy

i watch the muppet show, i don’t want my past coming back to me

i don’t want to get robbed again, i don’t want to nearly run over by idiotic people

i know this bloke who i don’t see much now, yeah he hates certain people, and i don’t hate anyone

that could turn a few heads

i hope paul isn’t dead, i hope we just haven’t gone out at the same time

because there are too many crazy people hanging around since he hasn’t been there

i know he ain’t my daddy, but i just think, it’s queerly strange

i hear this voice, paul, don’t go out when your friend goes out

we want to trick him

but then again, i am not out as much as i was, he is though, keep a good thought

THE LAST 6 HOURS OF THE YEAR, WE WILL PARTY DOWN, MAN



HI DUDEY WOODEYS, THIS IS GOING TO BE RADICALLY AWESOME, CAUSE

WE ARE ABOUT TO ENTER THE LAST 6 HOURS OF THIS FANTASTIC YEAR

AT 6 PM, OUR FRIENDS WERE STARTING TO COME FOR THE BIG SMASH SLAP TOGETHER

NEW YEARS EVE BBQ, YEAH, YOU SEE WE HAD COCA COLA, AND VB TOO

YES, A FEW MEN DRANK CARLTON DRAUGHT, SINGING DRINKING GAMES

AND OTHER GREAT SONGS, AS DAD COOKED SNAGS ON THE PLATE

YEAH THIS PARTY IS REALLY ROCKING DUDES, YEAH WE LOOK SET TO PARTY TILL LATE

AT 7 PM, WE HAVE FINISHED WITH THE MEAL AND THE KIDS NICKED OFF TO THE FRONT YARD

THEY PLAYED FRONT YARD CRICKET, AND IF THE BALL WAS HIT ON THE ROAD ON THE FULL

WE’LL MAKE IT STRIKE SIX AND OUT, THEN THE ADULTS CAME AROUND TO JOIN THE KIDS

BUT HATED THE RESULT, CAUSE THE KIDS WHIPPED THEIR **** AND THIS CRICKET MATCH

YEAH THE KIDS ARE THE WINNERS, SO THEY BROUGHT THE PUNCHBOWL TO USE AS THE WORLD SERIES CUP

AT 8 PM, THE NIGHT WAS FAST APPROACHING AND THE MOZZIES WERE EATING AT THE LADIES LEGS

THE MEN HAD THE RIGHT IDEA, SITTING BY THE COMPUTER WATCHING TOPSY THE CLOWN ON YOUTUBE INSTEAD

YEAH THEY ALL WERE SIPPING THEIR DRINKIEPOOS, YEAH THEY WERE NICE, OH YEAH

A GREAT NIGHT FOR QUALITY ENTERTAUNMENT, OOH OOH YEAH

AT 9PM, THE WHOLE GANG WERE GATHERING AROUND THE TELEVISION WATCHING THE FIREWORKS

AND ALL THE KIDS WERE HAPPY, SO WERE THE ADULTS, YEAH EVERYONE WAS HAVING SO MUCH FUN, OH YEAH

AND AUNTY JOE, DROPPED FRUIT PUNCH ALL OVER THE LOUNGE

AT 10PM, EVERYONE WATCHED SHAUN MCALLEF ON TV, HE MIGHT BE STUPID, HE MIGHT BE A FOOL, BUT

SURE MATE, YEAH, HE BROKE EVERY GOLDEN RULE ABOURT PARTYING, AND THAT WAS RESPECTING EVERY PARTY GOER

WHETHER YOU WANT TO OR NOT, SO WE TURNED OFF THAT CRAP AND DECIDED TO TALK OURSELVES

THAT WAS BETTER, OUR STORIES ARE BETTER THAN WHAT SHAUN WOULD EVER TELL

AT 11PM, THE KIDS WERE GETTING TIRED, CAUSE THEY RAN OUT OF BREATH, US ADULTS ARE LUCKY WE HAVE A MARGARITA TO SHARE

IT KEEPS US AWAKE, IT MAKES US FEEL GREAT, THEN MOTHER CAME AND BROUGHT OUT LAST HOUR OF YEAR NIBBLES

SO WE CAN SIT THERE AND ENJOY EATING RIGHT FOR THIS LAST HOUR

AT 11.55 PM WE TURNED ON THE BOX, AND WE ALL SANG SONGS OH YEAH, JOHN SANG FLY BURGERS, GEORGE SANG BREAK AWAY

PETE SANG HANNAH MONTANA’S NOBODY’S PERFECT, THE LOUNGE ROOM FELT LIKE SATURDAY NIGHT IN A NIGHT CLUB

AND IT FELT THAT RIGHT TILL THE 10   9   8   7   6   5   4   3   2    1 AND THEN WE POPPED OUR PARTY POPPERS AND

AT 12 MIDNIGHT, WE ALL SCREAMED OUT A GIANT HAPPY NEW YEAR

WITH ALL THE ADULTS AND KIDS AS WELL ARE GATHERING AT THIS HOUSE

AS WE PARTY THE YEAR OF 2014 AND WELCOME 2015 IN WITH A SMILE

YOU SEE OLD MEN SIP THEIR BEER SAYING OH DEAR, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU

I SAY TO THEM, HAPPY NEW YEAR, MAKE SURE YOU GO HOME, AND HAVE A SHOWER

CAUSE, MAN, YOU FUCKEN SMELL

AND DUDEY WOODEYS, WE ARE GOING TO DO THIS NEXT YEAR, SO BE AWARE

you see when i go out to the garden

i feel like just looking up

and daydreaming as i held the hose

and as i mow the grass

i look up to the sky and say

give me power, give me power

and i do the front lawn and the back lawn

and i am ever so lazy

and i want to have a drink

after i finish, i look forward to that

but my brain is pushing me into a faze

where i look up and around

mostly because i get very bored

but i really want to daydream

i can’t control it

but i want to just be lazy

as i mow and do gardening

i can never do commercial gardening

cause i am too **** slow

the boss would yell at me

saying c’mon brian hurry up hurry up

but i just want to look lazy

i don’t care how slow i am

my eyes will look up into the cosmos

and i can’t control it, oh i can’t control it

i like being a lazy gardener

cause mate that is how i like it

You see Rodney was a shy person  where everybody wants to play with him and this made his parents happy thinking Rodney has friends, you see Rodney was sharing his toys he got for his birthday with them and they gave away the item their family were giving him for
Birthdays and Christmas and
Then Rodney thought I have friends mate I Have friends
And then one guy said this shy dude is not like us and the next day he stole his lunch money and when Rodney stared at him
Thinking why aren't you nice like me but Jr. Didn't say that though and then he ignored his signals and went away to tell everyone to tease him but not in the normal run of the mill family way no, the way we will tease him is we will make him feel like he one of us and this will make his father jitter and cause a little situation between him and his father mainly being about protection and Rodney was thinking why has dad changed his way of acting I am making friends at school
They all hated what that big dude did to me but Rodney's dad said don't be a fool Rodney
Don't be a god forsaken fool
They are taking advantage of your shyness and Rodney thought his mates would like him better if he teased his father and hoping his father is wrong about his worries about the other young people but
As Rodney went to school he met Jacob who was really weird because he was getting to know him but the way he clutched his teeth saying be cool be cool but then when the group walked past and teased Rodney and Jacob urged them on saying yeah dudes and then he said to Rodney be cool
I realise those young dudes are big and tough but in this day and age we can't fight them off
But Jacob only said that to Rodney because Jacob wanted those teasing bullies to like him
And Rodney was just a bad smell who should ******* but Jacob said he was cool and made Rodney think he was cool
And then Jacob said be cool and went off to play with the bullies ya know teasing all the geeks and nerds and the autistic people who love to fight
Each other and Rodney went to the library to read and study for his test and he saw Jacob but he looked tough as if he didn't want to give Rodney the time of day and this made Rodney scared of Jacob but there was a soft spot just in case Jacob said be cool, you see Rodney was wondering why Jacob said be cool and the teachers who seem to Rodney's eyes were favouring the bullies and this made Rodney appear to be too shy to express himself and this started a long line of teasing for Rodney and unknown to Rodney the teasing was organised by Jacob because Jacob was jealous because he never went to Rodney's birthday parties and the kids were reaching into Rodney's back pocket to get his wallet and they put drawing pins on his chair and one guy named Peter stuck a drawing pin in his *** because you see Rodney only really opened up to certain people and also Peter Stoke the poster from his TV guide wrecking the entire book and Jacob said I don't want to go to Rodney 's house anyway and Rodney was very scared and started to jitter and his smart manly sticking up for himself thing was turning to voices saying your not a man
You are too Woosey to be a man and Rodney hated this
Because he played sports and he listened to cool music and he teased his parents what more do you want me to do
And Jacob said yeah In a real
Smart *** kind of a way and Rodney started to become scared of people and the only way to beat this scared feeling
He had to try and be like Jacob
Because Rodney was unaware
That Jacob was organising that these bullies just teased Rodney and some dudes said
You are just getting teased Rodney you see you are not getting mucked with you are not a cool kid you are not as cool as your brother and you are not famous because we are teasing you differently to the others Woosey and you are not like Jacob either ok
So, Rodney
Get teased mate
And this made Rodney's father really worried because he really loved Rodney but he was surprised Rodney was acting like such a fool and Jacob
Was sitting in his lounge room watching TV saying I feel really good about myself because I told everyone to tease Rodney and they did and then Jacob said to Rodney
I am a real family person Rodney and you are a hooligan
But really Rodney was getting tired of Jacob and the other kids teasing him at school
But Jacob didn't care and said
Mr shy person Rodney I am not your daddy I am not your cotton picking daddy so don't try and come to me for protection because I will do it again
Just do your homework
Play your computer game and
Don't **** with us ok and Rodney was very upset and took some of his raiders socks and ******* a boy who looked like Jacob  and said you will suffer forever and Jacob and
One school mate laughed at Rodney and Rodney saw that and Jacob tried to cover it up
By trying to pretend like he ****** cares and then this guy who nicked his lunch money said don't be shy mate just go out and be like us be like us be like us and Rodney said don't say mate his name is Rodney
You see Rodney isn't a fucken man and then Rodney's father was starting to give up on helping his son and Rodney wanted to get on with his life
But he became scared that those bullies are going to force a slowdown and Jacobs voice was planted in his head to tease him

Buddhist Christian Jews Muslims catholics hindus seeks and more
Watching carols on the lawn near a stage at a park going to concerts and the movies as well as too mini golf and throw an axe in the city and ride the merry go round and get an ice cream go to the theatre as well as to an art show and go to fireworks with music on our gorgeous lake go to the museum to play with the things there and climbing a mountain to get really fit and go to friends houses to play games board or action and may I remind you that ****** in the dark is fun going to Aussie rules games as well rugby league union and soccer cheer for your favourite team with a flag and a sign or maybe basketball cricket tennis and baseball enjoy those games going to bed to dream a lot and cook dinner which is nice going for a walk and some a run to get your body into gear
Sometimes it is hard to so you become a couch potato watching tv and YouTube and the streaming services because free to air totally suxalotsky there is only a news reading and a few shows as well as talent shows you could see different shows on catch up tv but don’t watch shows about ******, unless you want to
Or you need to keep up to date but that might make you go to bed late taking medication to make you feel better as well as have an imagination as well buy tablets to get rid of toothaches so Athena can heal your teeth, please god don’t let bad guys ****** me, a horrible way to die
I am a family person to do things with dignity and have a lot of fun

High living is the place to be
The life of nanny is the life for me
Doing knitting watching tv, helping poor people by having fun with them
Going for walks to the shop
Or around the block
And cooking very good meals
For the family
Putting the tree up
Watching Christmas parades watching concerts on New Year’s Eve and staying up on nye as well
High living is the place to be
The life of nanny is the life for me
I love her beautiful way she went through life
Even when you were naughty you will be in strife
I liked her loving way of worrying
Especially when you are with the drunks
She would think you weren’t very good
High living high living high living
Is the place to be
The life of nanny is the life for me
Cause she was a life lover
Like me
The life of nanny is the is the for me

THE LIFE OF THE ALLAN’S IN WOODBERRY




YA SEE I WENT TO CHURCH, AND MY MUM USED TO BOUNCE ME AROUND

TO SAY, WE BOUNCED YOU ON OUR BACKS BACK THEN

MY BROTHER WAS A BOY, WHO WAS OUT TA HAVE FUN

YEAH I WASN’T ISOLATED, NO, I WASN’T OH NO, I USED TO CRACK JOKES

CAUSE WE ARE A TELEVISION LOVING FAMILY

YA SEE ME AND MY BROTHER BOTH HAD FONZIE JACKETS

AND I HAD AN IMAGINATION TO SAY FONZIE GOES INTO DISGUISE

MY BROTHER SAID FONZIE DOESN’T HAVE A DISGUISE

AND DAD SAID, THIS FONZIE DOES, BACK THEN

I WASN’T A FRIENDS BOY AS SUCH, BUT I ENJOYED LIFE THOUGH

I ALSO TOLD MY FAMILY THAT WITH MY RADIO, I WAS TALKING TO DALE BUGGINS

THE MOTORCYCLE STUNT MAN, AND MY BROTHER SAID, NO YOUR NOT


I SAID, I AM KENNY EVERETT, BUT MY BROTHER WANTED TO BE A MANS KID

BUT I HAD DREAMS TO BE FAMOUS, I THOUGHT I WAS PLAYING MUSIC IN MY DREAMS,

I WAS THE ROCKER JIMMY BARNES, AND THE JIMMY BARNES YOU SEE

IS THE FAMILY LOVING JIMMY BARNES, AND I DRANK A BOTTLE OF SCOTCH ON STAGE

I REMEMBER ALL THE TEASING THAT ME AND MY BROTHER DID TOGETHER

IN HINDSIGHT, JUST FUN TEASING, LIKE NORMAL KIDS DO

MY BROTHER WATCHED COWBOYS AND INDIANS

AND I WENT TO CHURCH WITH MY MUMMY, CAUSE I LIKED THE THEORY BEHIND RELIGION

BY KEEPING PEOPLE WITH THE HEAR AND NOW

BUT I GREW TO HATE RELIGION WITH PHEADPHILE PRIESTS,

AND IF I KNEW MORE ABOUT THAT, DUDES, I WOULDN’T HAVE DONE MY CRIME

YA KNOW I HATE TERRORIST ATTACKS AND STUPID CULTS SAYING GOD SAID THIS

AND MOHAMMAD SAID THAT, I WISH THE WORLD WOULD END RELIGION

BUDDHISM IS A RESPECTFUL RELIGION, I AM LEARNING, HOW TO RESPECT WITH VOICES OF DESTRUCTION

I WANT TO SAVE THE WORLD

AND EVERY TIME I WATCH YOUNG GUYS ON AUSTRALIA’S GOT TALENT

I SEE MY BROTHER IN THEM, MY BROTHERS TALENT, INSPIRED ME

TO BRING MY IMAGINATION OUT THERE, I AM NO WOOSEY

I KNOW HOW TO USE A COMPUTER

I KNOW HOW TO WRITE A STORY

I REMEMBER MY BROTHER JOKING, SAYING MY BRAIN BEING CHOPPED OFF

WE WENT TO THE SHOW AND BOUGHT SHOW BAGS

WE WENT ON A LOT OF RIDES

AND WE ATE FAIRY FLOSS, OH YEAH

AND EATING DAGWOOD DOGS

OUR FAMILY WERE A HAPPY FAMILY GOING TO THE BEACH

WE HAD EARLY MORNING SWIMS

DAD AND BOUNCED ME AROUND ON THEIR BACKS

ME AND MY BROTHER TEASED ONE ANOTHER, IT WAS COOL

I WANTED TO WATCH MUSIC SHOWS ON TELEVISION

MY BROTHER WANTED TO WATCH BANABA SPLITS

SO MUM AND DAD BOTH PUT A TV IN OUR ROOMS

MY BROTHER WAS GIVEN A COOL KID CREDIT FROM THE COSMOS

TO PICK UP WAGGA TV, AND I DIDN’T, SO I WATCHED IT WITH MY BROTHER

MAYBE MY BROTHER DID EXACTLY WHAT THE COSMOS WANTED, AND I DIDN’T

I HASSLED MY DAD, AND MADE THE COSMOS VERY ANGRY WITH ME

WE WALKED AROUND PRINCES PARK IN CARLTON AND THE MCG

THE PEOPLE WERE NICER IN CARLTON RATHER THAN THE SNOBS AT THE MCG

AND WE WENT TO KIAMA, AND HAD A WOW OF A TIME THERE

AND WENT TO VISIT NANNY AND GRANNY IN NEWCASTLE AND MAITLAND

AND I SANG SONGS WITH MY COUSINS, REBECCA DAVID AND MICHEAL

WHICH TURNED THE ADULTS HEADS, IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION

DAD AND SUE WERE TWO SCHOOL TEACHERS TALKING ABOUT HOW TO DISCIPLINE CHILDREN TOGETHER

I WAS COOL, BUT I WANTED TO SIT UP AND WATCH TV

WITH THAT VOICE, GO TO BED BRIAN, EVEN ADULTS OR YOUNG DUDES GO TO BED

BUT I AM A PARTY DUDE WHO LOVES WATCHING TV, AND NOW YOUTUBE

The living years


This is a story of two people named Brian and peter who try and live very good lives, they exercise every morning by doing a lap around their suburb and they both go to work
Brian is an artist who wants to help the world through his art and despite his mind being made up, he thinks it would be good if he had a good job he will have money to go on holidays and Peter was a gym instructor who trained people to become fitter in mind body and spirit and unlike Brian
Peter believed in strong discipline and
Said it would be great if Brian would follow in his footsteps as opposed to just doing what he wants, both of them were from strong families who believed in the laid back kind of life but peter wanted more but it didn’t seem to work out for him no matter how many times he tried, and helping people with their fitness goals seemed to work out very well for him
And Brian was happy every time he sold an artwork and that inspired him to realise that art was his thing
Peter was suffering after a breakup with his girlfriend Joan who himself trained to be a better person but Joan wanted more from their relationship than peter did so they split up, Peter still trained her twice a week, and every day training Joan, Peter was worried about not being very cool, but then he was fit and strong and every 5 months joined a strongman tournament to make his world a hell of a lot better and cooler, and he always took it out on his mate Brian like saying clean your house and make it spotless ‘boy’ and then suddenly a client gave peter a ticket to see Adelaide crows play the Geelong cats because he couldn’t go and Peter decided to ask Brian if he was interested in going with him and Brian was excited because he really loves the Adelaide crows and watching them play really made him happy and Peter gave him the ticket and said, meet me at the gate or if I call and say I will be late go inside and get your seat and this is going to be exciting, and Peter loved to visit his mum and dad at their home in Coober pedy in which was an underground town, mainly at Christmas and other religious holidays and Brian had a life with his best mate Patrick who they have been mates since school, Brian and Patrick went to see concerts together as well as go to nightclubs as well as footy games mainly SANFL matches where both of them liked watching the Glenelg tigers play whether they won or lost it didn’t worry them it was just a game
But this story is not stuck in the past, no, Brian was now with peter but Patrick was there trying to make Brian
Understand that they are still friends
Through and through and then Brian wanted to be given a job in a job which he could make a difference like working in a homeless centre because he felt sorry for the homeless people as they have a lot of problems dealing with things that Brian and Peter take for granted but because of that some of the homeless people yelled at Brian saying if you want to help us ******* away from this place it isn’t the place that you want to work, no but it is my life today said Brian and Peter asked Brian if he was interested in having a hearty dinner of chicken parmigiana with fresh vegetables and pumpkin
And sometimes Brian got sick of Peter but if they departed their ways he would lose his house so he needed Peter with his high paying job to keep him in his house, besides which Brian
Feels for homeless people but didn’t want to be one of them and yes that was the bond that kept them together. The next day Brian went to his art group where he learned how to express his great imagination to the entire world and after a few weeks of Enjoying this he was asked if his art could be used in a television show on channel 7 because it is amazing how much expression is his works and this made Brian so happy and he went to the bottle shop and bought a nice sparkling wine to celebrate their good fortune and after another 2 weeks Ellen degenerous asked Brian to be on her show in the United States of America so she can get his wonderful expressive artworks out to the people
And Brian was ever so happy about that and he has seen the show and Brian wondered what gift Ellen was going to give him like something like $20-000 to get him in good courses
To make his art improve to the best of his ability but there was still no message of what Ellen was thinking of
And Peter taught Brian about the things he has to say when he is there to say he is a good artist to imply he deserves the money and Peter gave him a mock interview with him pretending he was Ellen and Brian was getting nervous and started to worry that Ellen will kick him out saying you will never be like us ‘ever
And then as the mock interview continued Brian said he wanted to be an actor saying his expressive art will give him confidence to come out of his shell and learn how to act and yes this will make Brian happy but peter asked questions that Ellen wouldn’t ask in a million years but he did that to tell him that he has the talent but he needs to show Ellen that and Brian got very emotional about it and Patrick was thinking Brian is turning into an emotinal ******* know an emo but Brian told Patrick to leave him the **** alone and let me live my life right, ok and then after the day was over Brian and Peter sat down and watched the footy matches that were on television that night and Brian was feeling confident about going on the Ellen show talking about his art and both Brian and Peter were happy with their lives but there is always things that could change their happiness just lurking around the corner like life’s problems.

The living years day 2



Today was a awkward day for Brian
Because he developed voices in his head from an old schoolyard bully named Paul Barker, the words brian is hearing is come on Brian you will never make it in the world you are a total failure, please Brian don’t cry, oh please don’t cry and this drove Brian to breaking point because hearing those voices were not his cup of tea
So when he discussed it with Peter, peter told him just try to eliminate those voices, keep them away from your everyday life and do something positive like exercise eg, running to keep your fitness up, because you need that positive vibe in you to eliminate the voice of Paul Barker forever and as you run yell in the air
Eliminate Paul Barker till you run out of breath and then Peter told him of the running festival with music and healthy food is coming up, and suggested Brian to come along to see if he could go the distance and then peter said Brian if you can do that
You will be a warrior and Paul Barker
Will leave your head forever and I would like to see what Paul Barker thinks of you then and Brian started to train for this running festival to go about his dream to get rid of the negative thoughts from his head
Peter said to Brian work hard work hard **** that negativity about you being a failure because you are not
You are a warrior Brian and you have to be new and improved to show the old bullies who is boss and even if Brian found it hard he decided he didn’t want to just make up excuses
He wanted to be a warrior he wanted to be new and improved, and each day he trained and trained very hard
And pushed himself to the limit
So when the day of the running festival came he would be up to his best potential and each minute each day Brian was feeling tired but he can feel himself getting fitter and fitter as the running festival came closer and closer, yes running became fun for Brian and when his friend Patrick noticed that Brian was becoming fitter from all that running he was doing
He joined in with peter to get Brian to get his bully out of head and try and create a positive mindset and this will make Brian achieve his dreams but there is one thing that Brian doesn’t like and that is people making dreams for him, like someone else dreaming up something good that will be fun for Brian and obsess about trying to make that happen but Brian wanted to do the running festival because running is great, the great John Becker played by ted Danson is a negative part of his life, Brian wanted to get himself off the couch and into great exercise to one day make it fun
Another thing Brian hated is people telling him to turn off his appliances off at a certain time because that will drive him crazy and as long as he does his exercising that shouldn’t really happen and Paul’s voice was fading and fading but suddenly it reached breaking point and this made Brian angry and he pushed that run really hard and the voice disappeared
Like Brian got up in nirvana and picked up a knife and jumped on Paul and stabbed him numerous times till Paul barkers voice was dead and buried and then at the end Brian Peter and Patrick had a Buddhist ritual to say goodbye to that bully in Brian’s head forever and then the day of the running festival came where there was great music and healthy food and Brian came in the middle of the pack but he didn’t collapse at all
Which was totally awesome dude

The living years day 3



Today Brian was very excited because he starts his new job as a cleaning contracter at a hotel smack bang in the middle of the city and he really was happy there and Peter and Patrick were happy for Brian getting this job to make him more money so he can have some fun but there was a downside but Brian was determined not to let the negative energy destroy him but the cosmos made him hear crazy voices to send his house directly to Jupiter moon and going out to steal a drink and putting $4 on the ground for the homeless people to pick up and he heard all of his family and Peter and Patrick flying around with him and Brian noticed the voices were the same since his last job so he was determined to keep himself out of the psych ward and keep his good job
You see Brian found this job fun it was a bit hard dealing with the bosses but
Brian was doing his work ok so there was no problem with that and then took his medication and went for a run around the block to block the voices from his head and at 9-00 he went to bed to get ready for work the next day thinking no more psych ward for me and when Brian got up he had breakfast with Peter and then after that he had his shower and got dressed and went to work and said
I almost got to the psych ward but then I decided to change my mindset to positive and working made Brian feel happy and alive never to be with any losers stuck in there and after Brian finished work he met Patrick for a beer and skittles and a hamburger as well and Brian and Patrick were feeling great and never ever will those voices be an issue

Take my meds take my meds
Before I go to bed,yeah
Then go to bed go to bed
And then get up and take it again
You must get better so you take your meds
And then you go to bed
And you watch tv abs have a shower and you put your body cream on
But you take your meds take your meds then you go to bed
And then you get up really really get up and take it again
Watch tv and go to low income work yeah well you can't win them all but as long as you take your meds take your meds
And go to bed
If you can't sleep can't sleep
You get up and watch tv
And when you get tired you go to bed and you have slept long enough you get up again
You watch tv and you eat your meals and you have a few nanna naps then you take your meds Take your meds then you watch tv and occasionally you go out and have a party but if you want to avoid people getting cranky with you, you must take your meds then get dressed and have a can of coke
Go to your party and have some fun and when it is over you take your meds take your meds and watch tv and then go to bed
And wake up and do it all again

My brain feels like it has a microchip in it

you see i am mentally ill, and i feel like the computer

people and the quacks are using me for some kind of

experiment, you see, they want to open my brain and

let out all i know about everything in my life

i don’t mind doing that, but in general speaking

i am not an experiment i am a person

i am not a shy man sitting on the couch

i am a talented artist and writer, and i do a bit of youtube entertaining

i know they **** shy people, if they **** ya off

so just for that, i don’t wanna be a shy person

you see the lobe is repeating the same word over and over again

like when i said i was greame thorne, i heard the name greame thorne

over and over again, like this guy said he was greame thorne, he just was kidnapped

i don’t know what we are going to do with him

you see i hate, the big ummmmmmm, it drives me crazy

i hate being told that i have to muck around with everyone in the crowd

and if i don’t, i am an old fogie, or an old fucken hag

i hate the littleness in these young dudes, they scared me away from being cool back then

if you don’t want to hear my life story, mate

you should’ve been nicer to me, you see i know in general speaking nobody put a gun to my head

but the kids teasing me, really got to me, and i totally cracked up

i hated tying up or grabbing kids, it was the kids not understanding i was a kid too

i feel, i don’t care if i am not strong enough

i just wanted to tease my dad, the old fucken hag

and i want dad’s next life to understand, real COOL

and make people think before they say, i don’t want to be cool

you see, i hated those kids who teased me back then

it would’ve been fun to play shows with the kids

and have little muck with teasing, yeah, that would be radical

you see, the spirits that controlled those kids voices are now in my mate patrick

you see, i wasn’t liking being shy, i wanted more friends, than what i had

i tried to be as normal as pie with my friends when i was listening to RAGE OZ TOP 50

i thought that was really radical dudes

that inspired me to play my rockabilly rebel chart show,on aaa youtube TV

you should watch it, it is ****** ACE, i know, there are some people who would be entertained by that show

i was the 80s **** kid, i liked playing computer soccer games with my brother

i watched TV and listening to my ghetto blaster

and i drew a symbol on my arm which meant put a lifeline through my heart, it was positive, dad  hated that

you see my brains activity is making me hear crazy voices saying

dad’   your one of the boys brian, your like me and mummy brian, your one of the adults brian

my brother’  your one of the kids brian, your still a kid, your not a young dude, no more

my mum your like me and your father

the young dudes at the back,   your one of the young dudes buddy, your still a young dude, your not trying to be a young dude

then the me ands, went really crazy, and all that is why i found it hard to live

i asked a man to kidnap me, but really i wore the pants in my family

i was CRAZY,  into thinking people liked to do bad things to me

but i hate being treated like a nerd, people are getting me back, but they are *****, cause they haven’t got much to show us

my brain which feels like a microchip, is really working over time

i am currently doing a tapestry of the 1958 XMAS on bondi beach, where me as greame thorne, was singing in a beautiful choir

and i did a tapestry of albert waldron’s footy days as well as patrick dunbars all previous lives of mine

so please one day, i want my head to have normal voices and thoughts rather than the stupid microchip nonsense

i still hear, shut up old fogie, your not like your brother, i say, i am cooler than dad, aren’t i buddy

you see i am very very hungry, so much in fact

i burp very weirdly, yeah i feel so weird

i burp loud and i burp soft when i have a nice cream bun or a nice beef nachos

and i feel like a nice packet of chocolate biscuits

ya know to have with my coca cola

i was watching ellen degenerous and i felt like eating the pie that went in the contestants face

yeah i feel like a bag of popcorn as well as choctop at the movies

because my mouth is burping very weirdly

i don’t want to have this burping feeling

i feel like a strawberry milk and i am fighting myself saying, no, i don’t need it

the strawberry milk says yes, i do, but i don’t want a strawberry milk, it’ll just make me fat

i wanna lose weight but the burping is making me want food, i want a nice chocolate bar

and i want a bag of marshmallows, i want to have more energy

so i can be a cool person, that i am,

i know the burping really is bugging me

and i do want it to stop, STOP, making me feel this way, i want to an artist and a writer and not an eater

please leave me alone strawberry milk and leave me alone chocolate biscuits, i don’t want to eat you

i feel like a chocolate biscuit, but then i say, i will grow fat, ya know keep the fat on me

i don’t want to be fat, i want to lose weight, so leave me alone ya ****** strawberry milk and coke

i want to feel fit in my mind, so i can write and be creative

please leave me alone, junk food, i don’t want to eat you

but the junk food gets in my mind and makes me smell the nice chocolate

i know coke used to be a medicine, but i don’t wanna drink ya

i like to have a healthy lifestyle, and i want to lose this burping because

it’s the medication making me wanna eat, like donuts and vanilla slices and cream buns

and dewok chinese stir fry’s and chocolate biscuits and chocolate desserts and strawberry milk

and a large bottle of coca cola, as my medicine, I DON’T WANT THAT

i had a garden salad for lunch as well as a few glasses of water

i hate being fat, so that means at 2-30 pm, i will go for another walk, whether i feel like it or not

because i must get rid of all this food from my body, so i don’t get diabetes

so if you feel fat, because you eat too much food, push yourself into walking

and walk a regular pace, so you don’t feel sluggish

the neptune benefit tooth extraction concert


with briano alliano


hi dudes, i am briano alliano and i am up here on neptune

doing a benefit concert to help athena help my earth body

with his tooth extraction, and the first song is i am bop and

i am unskinny, here goes



you see i am walking around looking silly, oh yeah

i party really hard, yeah

and i put gasoline to pump up my car yeah

and that makes me feel all so cool

my selected teeth are leaving my mouth yeah

i will party yeah, and that’ll make me cool

that makes me feel like i am bop, and i am unskinny

you see partying is the way to be

you see i am feeling all so strange

and when i was young i was called strange

by young dudes who were jealous of me

i party in the club with a seafood basket and a coke, yeah

yeah, green coke is what i like the best

and i am bop, and i am unskinny and i feel so radical

oh yeah, i do, yeah

i am having my tooth extractions

oh yeah, that will make me feel like i am falling overl, oh yeah

and that makes me bop, who is very unskinny, bop pity hoop

this next song, dudes is a ******* of our behaved prime minister

hey, mr abbott, why are my dentist bills so high

abbott replied, in these hardened economic times

we have to tighten our belts, and heads back to his mansion

and reverse cycle air conditioning

and we call out

hey, mr abbott

hey mr abbott

hey mr abbott

why are you giving us problems with dental care

you are stuffing us around, fella

so what is the problem, mr abbott, what f..k is going on

you are making poor people suffer, day in day out

and hey mr abbott, how do you suppose to think we feel about it

ya silly old fool, what’s wrong wit5h ya mr abbott

and now after i gave our behated prime minister a serve

here is my song called 15 miles

15 miles to get to the end

without some people driving us round the bend

ya see they are pushing us around every day and night

i am finding it hard to cross the stateline


you see i go to space every time i sleep

and when i am there, i have no time to peep

i throw methane all over the dead

brad, randy, mark and paul had a lot on them

and now i feel like tipping methane all over fred

and as i did that, i felt so great

then we go 15 miles to get to the end

without some people driving me round the bend

this concert, dudes raises the awareness of my dental surgery through athena

and i lay it out for my friend philomena

and travelling for 15 miles right on time

to get all the way to reach the state line

PARTY

PARTY

PARTY

PARTY

We’ll do that every day and night

as we reach the great australian bite, right now

and, dudes here is another song, called fly burgers

fly burgers, are as tasty as can be

fly burgers, are good enough for me

just catch a blowie between two buttered buns

add some lettuce and tomato

and have a lot of fun

at the footy, the flies are cooking on the plate

they are saying ya little young dudes

you are sitting up too late

just catch a well cooked blowie

and get out the bowl

put the fly in the burger mix

yeah, drown ‘em in a hole,

YEAH

fly burgers are good enough to eat

fly burgers are such a tasty treat

just catch a blowie between two buttered buns

then add lettuce and tomato

and have so much fun

now in a restaurant a fly comes in

and parks on the griller

you feel like going to the zoo

and talk to a gorilla

just catch that flaming’ blowie

and add lettuce and tomato

and cook the fly, yeah that is sweet

as tasty as gelato

fly burgers are good enough to eat

fly burgers are such a tasty treat

just catch a blowie between two buttered buns

add some lettuce and tomato

and have a lot of fun

in the summer friends drop round

to enjoy the atmosphere

some bring coke, some bring wine

and the australians all brought beer

the bbq man noticed a fly upon his back

he got the swat, and whacked it up,

OH HERE JACK

fly burgers are good enough to eat

fly burgers are such a tasty treat

just catch a blowie between

two buttered buns

add some lettuce and tomato

and have so much fun

now the hospital has been busy this year

since fly burgers were on the menu

people saying that fly burgers

put germs right in you

an old man, a young boy

both died of poisoning

and nobody knows if it was

the fly burgers that did them in

fly burgers are good enough to eat

fly burgers are such a tasty treat

just catch a blowie between tw2o buttered buns

add some lettuce and tomato

and have a lot of fun, and have soooo much ****** fun,

DUDES PARTY

DUDES PARTY

DUDES PARTY

YOUNG DUDES WANT TO HAVE FLY BURGERS ON BBQ PLATES ALL OVER THE WORLD

SO DO FAM——LI——ES

and have so much fun, oh yeah


here is the next song, called the club is open


you see the club is open, is open is open

you see the club is open for the patrons to enjoy

you see the club is open, is open, is open

you see the club is open for the patrons to enjoy

you see come on carry me, ya see a clubber, i will always be

the club is open for the patrons to enjoy

ya excellent service is so cool

yeah mate yeah, we break no rule

you see the club is open for the patrons to enjoy

and now i will get this methane smoothie and throw it all over the crowd, yeah

this will be cool, man

and now dudes, the dental surgery is complete

the benefit concert is over

i will fly back to Canberra

the tooth extraction is complete, i am leaving neptune

see ya next time,

tata love, from the oldie in myself

now here is the big jupiter sing off, where you sing for 30 seconds in front of a booth

the forest singer is paul berenyi singing i wanna rock and roll all night

you see i wanna rock and roll all night and party every day, yeah

i wanna rock and roll all night and party every day

you see as we go for a spin, the party has just began, so let me in

you drive me wild and make me happy

i wanna rock and roll all night and party every day, oh yeah

and now here is sam kinison with wild thing

wild thing, oh oh oh yeah, you make my heart sing, that is so very groovy

my heart jumps right out of my body and makes me wanna fall

and now here is briano alliano with his number

well, i am having troubles trying to explain that i went just went to neptune TAFE

where i get all my experience to do this

it’s the nicest TAFE, and might i mention the only TAFE in the solar system apart from earth

and it looks really cosmic too

and then micheal jackson came out with his number

the way you make me feel, ya make me feel so right

everybody learn the ABC, everyone learn do re mi, and a 1 2 3 and far so la te

and you know i am bad i am bad i am very very bad ya know it

and now it’s daniel messiah and barney bromwich singing their great song

i am happy, so very happy sunday monday happy days

tuesday wednesday happy days thursday friday happy days

saturday, oh what a day brings in a whole lot for you

ok thanks and see ya next time on neptune

please chuck methane all over everyone

Woolly bully
Oh yeah your a woolly bully
You have to bully bully me
About things I don’t understand
You want me to be your perfect model
And if I don’t want to be one
You don’t care
You say I should go to bed early
So you can muck with the kids
Your a woolly bully
Oh yeah you are a woolly bully
You say you couldn’t see me get married because you thought I was a nerd
You don’t realise what that did to me
You say I should keep my house tidy
Sure if I wasn’t bullied
My house would be cleaner
Than you imagine
But you feel you need to bully me
You
Woolly bully
Oh yeah you woolly bully
You try and make me write poems
To make you happy
And if I said I prefer my own
You will say it is the wrong answer
I don’t know how to say to you
That you are a bully mate
Some people say bullies are cool
But I think they are cowards
Big cowards
I am trying to keep myself out of the psych ward
Because I got bullied in there
But the really bad bullies I find
Are the ones who push discipline in you and not follow discipline themselves
One set of rules for me
And another set of rules for the bully
I am getting old but I still hate bullies
I do go to bed but I don’t want to head there early
You are a woolly bully oh yeah mate
You are a woolly bully cool man eat my shorts
If I don’t have bullies in my life
I could achieve everything I want to be
I can do what I want to make me happy
As opposed to doing what makes other people happy
Believing what could happen does affect my life
They are woolly bullies
Really are woolly bullies
Never saying that I don’t want to be cool saying only kids be cool
But you act cool
No I am an adult and I want to be cool
There is nothing in this world I couldn’t do
But I need to do it my way
Because I need to do what I wanna do
And not what a trainer or old school friend wants me to do
Even if I look happy to them
I won’t be happy deep down
Woolly bully
You are a **** of a woolly bully
Even if you don’t agree with me
You can’t push me into things I don’t want to do deep down
Because that makes you a woolly bully mate

THE NEW YEAR TIGER HAS GRACED US WITH HIS PRESENCE



YA SEE GRAWL GOES THE BIG TIGER

AS WE ARE ABOUT TO CELEBRATE A GREAT NEW YEARS FEAST

YA SEE YOU MIGHT BE SITTING AT HOME

WITH YA KEBABS AND SNAGS AND STEAKS AND ****

BUT I CAN TELL YOU ONE THING

THAT YOU DON’T HAVE TO COOK FOR THE NEW YEAR TIGER

CAUSE BEING A TIGER HE LIKES IT RAW

YEAH ROAR GOES THE NEW YEAR TIGER TONIGHT

ROAR GOES THE NEW YEAR TIGER, YEAH

ROAR GOES THE NEW YEAR TIGER TONIGHT

AND WE’LL PARTY RIGHT TILL MIDNIGHT

MIDNIGHT, THE ONE MIDNIGHT WHEN HE DROP THE BALL, HAVE FIREWORKS DISPLAYS

ALL OVER THE PLACE, AND HAVE A TIGER GROWL

EXPLAINING, HE IS THE NEW YEAR TIGER

AND COMING TO GRAB ALL THE GRUB AND *****

THAN HE CAN POKE A STICK AT

NEW YEAR TIGER NEW YEAR TIGER NEW YEAR TIGER

WHAT A WAY TO END THE YEAR, OH NO, WAY

THE HAPPY GO LUCKY CAT, NEW YEAR TIGER

PARTIES ALL THROUGH THE LAND

YA SEE WE COUNT DOWN WITH HIM

RIGHT DOWN FROM TOP TO BOTTOM OH YEAH

AND THE MEN ASKED THE NEW YEAR TIGER FOR

A NICE COLD CAN OF BEER

DRINK IT DOWN, BURP IT OUT

MAKE THE NEW YEAR FUN, COME UP AND DOWN

MR HAPPY CHICKS SAID TO ME

THE NEW YEAR TIGER IS THE COOLEST ***** THAT YOU’LL EVER SEE

THE NEW YEAR TIGER GROWLS FOR A GOOD TIME

AND GROWLS FOR A BAD TIME

HE GROWLS AT ANYTIME, TO TICKLE YA FANCY

LIKE MY MATE NANCY, DO A DANCEY

LIKE YOUR MATE CLANCY, WHO WAS THE TIGER THEY CROSSED WITH A LION

TO CALL IT A TIGON,

WE WISH YOU A HAPPY NEW YEAR

WE WISH YOU A HAPPY NEW YEAR

WE WISH YOU A HAPPY NEW YEAR

FROM THE NEW YEAR TIGER TO YOU, GROOOOOWWWL, HAPPY NEW YEAR

THE ALLAN FAMILY STORY


THIS WEEKEND I AM HAVING A BREAK FROM MY BROTHER, MUM AND DAD

AND WENT CAMPING IN THE MICHELAGO FARM HOUSE, TO GET MEDALS

IN THE DUKE OF EDINBURGH AWARD SCHEME, YA SEE, MUM WAS WORKING

SO DAD TOOK ME SHOPPING TO GET LAST MINUTE SUPPLIES AND THE NEXT DAY

WE HEADED OFF TO MARIST TO BOARD THE TRUCK, AND PAUL GRAHAM

WHO I THOUGHT WAS A REAL COOL DUDE, SANG ALL THESE GREAT SONGS

LIKE EYE OF THE TIGER, COURT OF KING CARACTULOUS, AND MANY MORE

AND WE ARRIVED, AND THERE WERE NO BEDS, JUST HARD FLOORS, THIS ISN’T ACCOMODATION

THIS IS UNCOMFORTABLE, WE COOLED BACON AND EGGS, BRAISED STEAK AND ONIONS

AND I ATE A SPACE FOOD STICK, AND JENNIFER JONES SAID, THAT IS MY SPACE FOOD

STICK, AND I SAID, NO THIS IS MINE, I IGNORED HER AND WENT TO TALK TO BRENDAN AND LANCE

CAUSE, THEY UNDERSTAND WOMENS PROBLEMS

YA SEE WE DID CANOEING AND HIKING WITH OUR BACKPACKS ON, AND ALSO, IN THE

MIDDLE OF A GREAT NICE COUNTRY DAY, THEN I CRACKED JOKES WITH SOME OF THE GIRLS THERE

AND STEVEN SANG EYE OF THE BULL FROG, AND I WONDERED, ALSO OTHER WEEKENDS, WE AS THE SENIOR MEMBERS

OF THE DUKE OF EDINBUIRGH, WE HAD TO LOOK AFTER THE JUNIOR MEMBERS OF THE AWARD SCHEME

AND THIS WAS A MORE COMFORTABLE SEATS, THIS WAS COMMUNITY SERVICE, WE ALSO DID MEALS ON WHEELS,

YA KNOW GIVING MEALS TO THE ELDERLY, WHO CAN NO LONGER FEND FOR THEMSELVES

THE MOST POPULAR PLACE WAS HALL VILLAGE,

AND I REMEMBER THE TEACHERS MAKING ME KISS RICHARD, BUT I WASN’T THINKING OF GAY ACTITIVTY

YA KNOW, JUST TEASING HIM, BUT I WAS SAYING, I AM AN ADULT, IN THIS SITUATION

YA SEE THE MANY BUSH WALKS AS A KID, GAVE ME A SENSE OF ADVENTURE

AND ALSO, GAVE ME THE CHANCE TO HELP PEOPLE IN ANY WAY THEY SEE FIT

IT GAVE ME THE FEELING OF DOING THINGS FOR MY FELLOW HUMANS

I HIKED UP THE SNOWY IN THONGS, I WENT TO WELLINGTON CAVES

YEAH, I AND MY TWO MATES, BRENDAN AND LANCE WERE LIVING DANGEROUSLY

BY NOT WEARING A LIFE JACKET, WE’LL PUT IT ON LATER WE WOULD SAY

BROTHER KEVIN BRENDAN, LANCE, WHY HASN’T BRIAN GOT A LIFE JACKET ON

YA KNOW THE FUCKEN RULES, AND WE ALL HAD A WOW OF A TIME

AND SANG SONGS ON THE WAY BACK, WHAT ABOUT ME, EYE OF THE TIGER

AND MANY MANY MORE, AND WHEN WE GOT BACK TO THE SCHOOL, ONE GUYS PARENTS

WEREN’T THERE, AND MY PARENTS OFFERED A ROOM FOR THE NIGHT

BUT HE DECLINED IT, IMPLYING, I DON’T WANT TO GO TO MY HOUSE

I IMPLIED, WHY NOT, YOU NEED SHELTER, I GOT SHELTER

HE SAID, WELL, NO, I WILL JUST WAIT, TILL THEY ARRIVE

SO I WENT HOME WITH MY PARENTS, DAD SAID THE RAIDERS WON, IT MADE ME HAPPY

AND I WENT HOME AND TOLD MY BROTHER AND DAD AND MUM ALL ABOUT

MY WONDERFUL DUKE OF EDINBURGH AWARD SCHEME EXPERIENCE, THIS IS COOL, MAN EAT MY SHORTS

AND THE ALLAN’S CRACKED JOKES, I SAID AND HE, MUM THOUGHT HE MEANT ANDY

BUT THERE WAS NO PHONE CALL, SO THE ALLAN’S ALL RETIRED TO THEIR ROOM

MUM AND I WENT TO BED, CAUSE IT WAS A BIG WEEKEND, BUT THE NEXT

DAY, I WAS PARADING AROUND THE SCHOOL,

THE ALLAN FAMILY STORY PART 4




YA SEE, I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN A LITTLE COOL KID TO THE FAMILY

IN MY MUM AND DADS EYES, AND I USED TO PLAY SHOWS LIKE THE COOPERS

FAMILY, WHICH IS ABOUT RON AND SALLY’S QUEST TO OPEN A FAMILY BUSINESS

IN A HOSPITAL, WHERE THEY HAD A SON, DAVID, AND HE MARRIED RAELEEN

AND THEY HAD A BOY NAMED DON COOPER, AND THEY HAD A DAUGHTER NAMED

SUE COOPER WHO MARRIED BIKIE JOHN PRENDTH, AND HAD A LITTLE BOY NAMED

FRANK PRENDTH, AND I WAS GETTING INSPIRATION FROM MAGAZINES AND TV

ON HOW TO BRING MORE CHARACTERS, LIKE JACK RUNNING THE BAR, JEAN AS THE COOK

AND MARTIN TATE, AS THE AMBULANCE DRIVER, WHO WAS A BIT OF AN ALCOHOLIC

WHO WAS IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH MENTAL HEALTH NURSE, MICHELLE TATE, AND THE

THEME SONG WAS, AIN’T SHE SWEET, SEE HER COMING DOWN THE STREET

I ASK HER VERY CONFIDENTIALLY, AIN’T SHE SWEET, AIN’T SHE NICE

LOOK HER OVER ONCE OR TWICE, I ASK YOU VERY CONFIDENTIALLY AIN’T SHE NICE

JUST CAST AN EYE, IN HER DIRECTION, OH ME OH MY, AIN’T THAT PERFECTION

I REPEAT, I THINK THAT’S KIND OF NEAT, I ASK YOU VERY CONFIDENIALLY AIN’T SHE NICE

AND I PLAYED BEWITCHED, AND MY BROTHER SAID, DO YOU PLAY IT, THAT IS SO STUPID

BUT IF I WANNA PLAY A SHOW, I WILL PLAY A SHOW, I DO WHAT I WANNA DO, IT’S LIKE THIS

WRITING, AND I ENJOYED TWITCHING MY NOSE TRYING TO ZAP MYSELF 1 MILLION DOLLARS

OR TO A REMOTE RESTAURANT IN THE HEART OF TOWN,

MY NEXT SHOW, I PLAYED WAS LIVE STOCK, ABOUT A VET NAMED MARK SARGENT, COMING TO

START A PRACTICE IN CLAXTON HILL, AND EACH EPISODE HE WENT ABOUT HIS ROUNDS AT ALL

THE FARMS IN THE DISTRICT, AND ROBBO’S PUB, WHERE MARK OFTEN WENT FOR FRIDAY AND

SATURDAY NIGHT DRINKS, AND A LOT OF THE KIDS OF CLAXTON HILL, WERE OFTEN GETTING INTO

PROBLEMS, I GOT THIS IDEA, FROM A MIXTURE OF ALL THE SOAPS IN THE 80S AND ALSO THE VET

SHOW, CALLED, ALL CREATURES GREAT AND SMALL, EVERY NEW YEARS EVE, I WILL PLAY A NEW YEARS SHOW

FEATURING THE NEW YEAR TIGER, AND THE CAST OF ALL MY FAKE TELEVISION SHOW CHARACTERS

AND ONCE AT MY GRANDMAS HOUSE, I PLAYED A CHRISTMAS SHOW IN HER BACKYARD AND I WAS A LOUD WILD DUDE

I SANG WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS, WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS

AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR, AND SOME KIDS CAME TO ME, AND SAID, CAN YOU SHUT UP, WE WANT YOU TO SHUT UP

THIS WAS BECAUSE, I RAN AWAY FROM TEASERS AS A KID, CAUSE I WAS A TAD SCARED, MY BROTHER WASN’T THOUGH, HE STAYED

WITH THEM, AND THE KIDS SAID WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS

CAUSE WE’RE TEASING YOU, YA SEE I THOUGHT I WAS A REAL MANS KID, YA SEE I THOUGHT JUST BECAUSE I WAS A SPORTS WATCHER

IT MEANS I GET LEFT ALONE, IT DOESN’T SILENCE ME, IF I WANT TO PL;AY SHOWS, I WILL DO IT IN MY ROOM, AND ALL THE ADULTS

WERE WORRIED, CAUSE THEIR PERFECT AURA WAS RUINED, AND TO THESE KIDS, I WAS A REAL SHY PERSON, BUT I USED

TO TEASE AT SCHOOL, I NEVER WAGGED UNLESS IT WAS THE LAST DAY AT SCHOOL, BECAUSE, I LIKED MY MATES AT SCHOOL

THEY WERE ALL SO NICE TO ME, I JUST ENJOYED THESE POOR LITTLE KIDDIES, IN THE BACKYARD OF MY GRANNY’S HOUSE

AND I PLAYED AUSSIE RULES IN THE FRONT YARD, YA SEE, I PLAYED MY WEEKLY MAFL TOURNAMENT, AND MY BROTHER PLAYED HIS COMP

YA SEE, WHEN MY BROTHER WAS AT A MATES HOUSE, I DID MY MAFL TOURNAMENT, AND DAD CAME OUT AND SAID, YOU HAVE TO

LIVE IN THE REAL WORLD, BRIAN, CAUSE, THIS ISN’T A FOOTY GROUND, IT’S A FRONT YARD WITH A GARDEN, AND MUMMY WANTS

TO GROW FLOWERS, SO I WILL TAKE YOUR FOOTBALL AND BAN IT FROM YOU, I KNOW YOU ARE A KID, BUT, MUMMY WANTS

TO START A GARDEN, AND I USED TO GET TEASED, BY PEOPLE WALKING PAST, SAYING, I ACT LIKE AN IDIOT OUTSIDE, AND I

SAID, I AM NOT SHY, I LIKE PLAYING FOOTY WITH MY BROTHER OUTSIDE, I PLAYED JAILBIRD AT MY SCHOOL, WHICH IS ABOUT

TWO BIRDS, JAIL BIRD FLIES AROUND THE JAIL CHECKING ON EACH INMATES WELL BEING, AND FREE BIRD, CAPTURES THE

CRIMINALS TO BRING THEM TO JAILBIRD TO BE LOCKED AWAY, AND MY SCHOOL LOOKED AT IT AS ME TALKING TO THE TREES

ME AND MY BROTHER, USED TO PLAY FRONT YARD AND BACKYARD CRICKET, MY COUNTRY WAS MYTH WITH PLAYERS LIKE
DEAN MASSEY, ASHLEY MONDEY, AND MYSELF, MY BROTHERS COUNTRY

WAS ETHIOPIA, WITH PLAYERS LIKE TRINNEN, BOTANY, LAITLAT, AND MANY MORE, AND THE STREET USED TO COME IN AND

PLAY YARD CRICKET WITH US, I ENJOYED THIS, MY MATE LYLE WAS A REALLY WILD BOWLER, I CAN HARDLY HIT ANY OF HIS BOWLS

THEY ARE SO **** FAST, I START TO THINK THAT LYLE WAS A VERY FAST BOWLER IN HIS PREVIOUS LIFE, I ALSO PLAYED

WATER CRICKET IN THE SWIMMING POOL, AND THIS WAS EVER SO FUN, BUT ON A HOT DAY, AND THE BALL WAS HIT OUT

OF THE WATER, IT WAS HARD FOR EACH OF US TO GET OUT OF THE NICE COOL WATER TO FETCH THE BALL,

I PLAYED SPORTS SHOWS WITH MY BROTHER, AND WE GOT IN MANY FIGHTS, LIKE NORMAL KIDS DO, AND

DAD SAT THERE WATCHING TV, SAYING ME AND MUMMY DIDN’T REALISE HAVING KIDS WILL BE THIS HARD

LIKE HE CRAWLED UNDER A ROCK OR SOMETHING, I WATCHED FAMOUS FIVE AND SECRET VALLEY AND

I WATCHED SKIPPY, WHERE KIDS WERE GETTING ******* ALL THE TIME, AND I WATCHED YOU CAN’T DO THAT ON TV

AND SAW KIDS IN A DUNGEON, YEAH HYPED ME OUT, I BOUGHT MAGAZINES, AND PUT TEXTA GAGS ON KIDS MOUTHS

AND TEXTA DRAW ROPE AROUND THOSE KIDS, MY BROTHER SAID TO MELINDA, WE SHOULDN’T TELL OUR PARENTS EVERYTHING

I DANCED TO POISON AND EVERY SATURDAY MORNING I WATCHED THE RAGE TOP 50 ON ABC TV, AND EACH WEEK

I WROTE THE CHART DOWN, LIKE I HAD AUTISM OR SOMETHING, AND AFTER THAT, I WENT TO BOWLING

AND I WATCHED THE CHART WITH MY BROTHER, WHEN HE GOT OUT OF BED, AND WE PARTIED TO THE CHART SHOW EVERY SATURDAY MORNING

THEY STOPPED DOING THAT IN 2008, BUT I LOST INTEREST IN DOING THAT, WHEN I FOUND OUT ALL MY PROBLEMS ARE A RESULT

OF SCHITZOPHRENIA, AND I PRETENDED I WAS A BIG TV MANAGER, GOING FROM PUB TO PUB, WHAT IS ACTUALLY WRONG WITH THAT

BUT I WAS PRETENDING TOO MUCH, 1 2 3 4 DO THE SCHITZOPHRENIC FROM MY FIRST DIAGNOSIS TO MY CURRENT SITUATION

I AM ON MEDICATION, NOW I AM REFORMED, CAUSE THIS SHOWS THAT I AM A FAMILY PERSON.

the nice tommy carter



tommy carter was a kid who was a bubbly little cool kid, who used to hit people on the backs

and he had a very good imagination, which sometimes got the better of him, you see all his friends

played fun little games with tommy, saying you are weird tom, you are weird tom, you see tommy’s father

and mother were so nice to him, you see they will treat him like a little bubbly little cool kid, which got

tommy’s llittle bro ernie so jealous of him, you see ernice teased tommy a lot, he said, you are a little spas boy

tommy and tommy teased ernie by making ernie move around in circles, you see tommy was a tad different

in the fact that when people teased him, like saying, what’s that, your still getting teased, what’s that your still getting teased

and then tommy’s dad noticed that the teasing was really affecting tommy and decided to stop being the cool man

and he labelled himself a little quiet man, or a yepyoubigfuckheadyeahmanbop, which is a very together person who

doesn’t understand that tommy wanted to be a cool kid back then but he found it hard to understand why

was his dad changing his lifestyle, ya know changing his way of life, you see tommy liked going to the march

with his dad, so he as well as his dad can pay their res[ect to the fallen diggers, on anzac parade and tommy’s dad

played santa claus at the local mall, and tommy’s mum took tommy and ernie to see him as santa, and tommy’s dad

at easter time, used to lay all the easter eggs out  so tommy and ernie can go to church and then go hiome

and get ready to search for the easter egg hunt, and i know they lived in australia, but that didn’t stop tommy dressing

tommy and ernie into halloween clothes and go around door to door saying trick or treat, this made tommy happy

as he got the most treats and make ernie very jealous and then tommy and ernie helped their mother serve out meals for the homeless

and tommy learnt that the homeless are very interesting and nice people and tommy made a few mates as he was serving the

meals, and let me tell you, that the big annual christmas party was the best, tommy was forced to dress up as santa

to spread christmas cheer to all the poor people, and tommy wears his grandfather’s medals at anzac day ceremonies

and decided to post the anzac day march on youtube, and another thing too, ernie got tommy into playing footy in

the front yard and a few mates from tommy’s school gave tommy a serve thinking he was CRAZY, playing around loud outside

but tommy didn’t care, and started to commentate his loud voiceover to his footy game, and tommy’s dad can’t really cope with

loud children, tried to show his army discipline to calm his two sons tommy and ernie, and he said, my two sons are enjoying life

playing footy in the front yard, and because tommy and ernie’s vdad really liked quiet people decided to have a cat fight with tommy

he called tommy a fool and he called him a silly clot, and he also said, the reason why i do this cause i love you tommy and i love both

of my two sons, i am trying to settle you 2 down, so tommy’s dad went into tommy’s room and tickled him and gave him a round the room

piggy back, and as he tickled him, he said, tickle tickle tum tum tickle tickle too, tickle;tickle tum tum tickle my two sons yo hoo

and this made tommy very excited as he was feeling the very big boney fingers of his father, press into his stomach, and as his father

tickled ernie, ernie laughed as well, but when tommy met johnno, who said be like us, and johnno partied with tommy and spoke to ernie and

ernie said to johnno tommy poos his pants and he talks to himself and johnno laughed along with ernie and tommy said, you are a *******

a really big *******, i make the first mate who liked me for me, and you spoil it ernie and ernie said ha ha tommy is a loser, baby, you can’t change me

and tommy was upset so he crawled through the drainpipe and he portended he was kidnapped and thrown into a garbage hopper by some drinkers

in a near by pub, and tommy lied to johnno, saying he got mugged, just to have johnno walk home with him, because tommy was a tad scared

of what bad guys will do to him, and johnno said, don’t be shy, be one of us good guys, be one of us good guys buddy, and now he watched the

anzac day march, tommy wanted to pay his respects to the fallen diggers and every april 25, wild horses couldn’t get in the way of tommy going

to the march to pay his respects and he is ready to enjoy everything that his dad taught him, now tommy’s dad his dead. tommy still wants to be

a bubbly little cool kid, but he isn’t a kid

84, we want more
Of the good stuff anybody wants yeah
You see when we steal your stuff
We need to be secret
93, do a wee, in the bath tub now
Next to your mum
Maybe that is discusting mate
Don’t do it again
77, my dads in heaven
And when I go to sleep I visit him
I muck with him to remind him
What the past was like
99, I know there is a sign
For enjoying life oh yeah that is fine
Drinking beer isn’t partying as much
As hyperactive laughing in your house
28 eat your food off your plate
Finish it all before it is too late
Why don’t you be more like your big brother Lyle
53, my anxiety is playing up again making me look up unnecessary
You can’t control the movement because it is ****** annoying
Oh yeah bow bow feeling anxious again
41, Sydney won against the giants in the neafl how cool not many people there but it is so great
Giants need a kick up the ***
99, winning the battle online
Typing stories about your life which can be cool, yes it is so cool and awesome too
56, a rooster has ***, with a chook
To make a cute little chick
And that is the way of the world mate
That is the way of the world

THE ORIGINAL REASON OF MY LOOKING UP


YA SEE, I WAS LIVING IN MY BACKYARD

AND I HATED IT, YA SEE EVERY TIME I WENT UP TO THE HOUSE

SO THE ONLY WAY FOR ME TO CHANGE THIS

IS GO TO THE MALL, AND GO TO WORK, JUST

TO HAVE PEACE FROM MUM AND DAD

THEY ARE NICE PEOPLE, BUT I WAS SICK

I NEED TO BE TREATED BETTER, I DON’T WANNA HAVE VOICES LIKE THESE

I AM GOING TO HAVE A EGG AND BACON ROLL AT ROCKSALT TOMORROW

CAUSE I AM COOLER THAN COOL

I BREAK NO RULES, EXCEPT FOR THE PROBLEMS, WITH MY SEXUALITY

I WISH PEOPLE WOULD LEAVE ME ALONE

SO I CAN GET ON WITH BEING

1    AN ARTIST, PUTTING ARTWORKS IN AN EXHIBITION, COOL

2     A WRITER, WRITING ON WRITERSCAFE AND HELLO WRITERS

3   AN ENTERTAINER OF YOUTUBE AS WELL AS A TV ENTERTAINER OR A THEATRE ENTERTAINER

4   AN IDEALIST, MEANING, I HAVE WAYS OF HELPING THE POOR, I WANT TO LAY THE PLANS ON THE TABLE

AND MANY OTHER THINGS

I WANT TO BE ABLE TO RELAX, AND CHILL, AND NOT GET DEFENSIVE,

I WANT MEDICATION TO CALM ME DOWN

I AM NOT A FIGHTING MAN

FIGHTING MEN HAVE PROBLEMS, WITH GETTING EVICTED

YA SEE THE ORIGINAL REASON, OF ME LOOKING UP

I WASN’T TELLING PEOPLE MY BELIEFS, I WAS A BIT SHY TO EXPRESS MYSELF AT SCHOOL

AND I BELIEVE WE PARTY ALL OVER THE SKY

I AM NOT A ******, I AM RADICAL

TAKE THESE VOICES AWAY, TO STOP ME LOOKING UP

AND THE LAST REASON WHY I LOOKED UP, IS

I TOLD ALL THE ADULTS THAT I PREFERRED THE HOOLIGAN LIFE

PLEASE LEAVE ME BE, BUDDY OLE BOY OLE PAL

AND I NEVER THOUGHT DAD FORGAVE ME, DAD CHANGED, SORRY

AND NOW KNOW DAD FORGIVE ME, PEOPLE DON’T DIE, THEY END SUFFERING

AND RELAX TILL NEXT LIFE

No you are still a young dude, even though


My stupid old mate from school, always treats me like a young dude
Even if he knows I will prefer to be a cool kid to the adults
And I mean the mature adults, because the young dudes he means
Are too immature for me, I know I am a man, and I ain!t too shy to be a man
And my friend needs to fucken get a life
Because screams out of his house saying, no your still a little young dude, man
Your not a cool kid anymore, man, blah blah blah blah
This drives me c r a z y, because I am in my 40s I am not young
I am a middle-ager who loves life, and I mean real life
Not this crazy life you see at the local malls
My friend from school is sitting there saying over and over again
Your still a young dude, mate, and he says that 100 times
Your still a young dude, your still a young dude, your still a young dude
FUCKEN SHUT UP, I want to be together, and not sit at the mall
Seeing this spontaneous atmosphere, structure works better
If you are structured, your mind is better, and my old school friend says
Be a little young dude, be a little young Dude, be a little young dude
I am a man, and I want people to be normal, not fake normal
Treating me like a shy person coming through
Cause I ain't a shy person, so mate, while your sitting there saying
I am still a little young dude, think about me, I am a real man
A creative man,  don't drink, I don't smoke, and I don't do spur of the moment ****
So stop saying your still a little young dude, aren't young, I am a man
******* and leave me the **** alone, I ain't young anymore
You are driving me crazy trying to keep saying i am a little young dude
And when I go out and be a cool kid, he will say, 'laughing'
Yeah come on and try and be a cool kid to the families, come on
You see mate, you are shy, and the only way you are like us
Is if you watch me, and that is the only way, you aren't a normal man
So now mate, you are a little young dude, and then my school friend
Says to the townsfolk, don't be his kind of cool, cause he is still a young dude
And he will say after that, hang on and them say after I don't respond
No your a little young dude, and when my father yells our get ****** mate
And then he pushes his mouth side to side, thinking oh a little kid, he is
And then this friend says get ****** me, moving his mouth side to side saying the same
Then when i go out, he will say, no, your not like us, buddy, no your not like us anymore buddy, you are still a little young dude, oh baby, yes, you are still a little young dude, who
Really hasn't a pressure in the world, then I get up and work in the house
Or I will go and do something that is part of life, he will say no, don't muck with him
Anymore townsfolk, cause he is still a little young dude, yeah still a little young dude
And when I look at him, he will look at me and smile, to me I saw the little shy boy thing
As he is treating me like a cool person, cause I don't know what cool is
But really he is trying to stop me from being a creative person, and them I look
Around, he says, no, buddy, your still a little young dude, b. u. d.  d.   y
Your too shy to be like us, buddy, and I said, I am a man, because
He is the one who is too shy, cause he has no fucken class, dudes
You see if ignore him, my mind is full of the old men trying to call me a coward
And when they can't get it through to me, the young men will call me a ****
And I went around saying, I am not a little baby shy boy, you guys aren't like us, man
Then my friend says, no, your still a little young dude, man
You are too shy to be like us, buddy, your still a little young dude,,buddy
It's enough to drive you to drink and I did, at that moment I was so *******
At him saying to me, your still a little young dude buddy, I drank myself stupid
And it didn't fucken stop, my school friend sat there in his house
On the other side of the town, sat there smiling, saying, your a little young dude buddy
And then let out a very big smile, and your still a little young dude, your
In an imaginery little world, too afraid of the real world
I sit and think about it, what is the real world anyway, there is no real world
It's a world which is part imaginery and part real
And as long as you balance it well, you'll be so cool
But, at this moment in time, I ain't a young dude, I am a middle aged man with
A heart of gold, and when I go out, I see two kids playing at the shops
And then they leave, and they both say, your still a little young dude
And I say, no, dudes, I am a real real man, with a heart of steel
I don't get a license, cause for me, it's so unreal
The force is trying to give me cancer, but,no kind sir
I am too smart for that, uh
Then my friend came up to me and said, you are still a little young dude with no friends
Whose a little young dude with no friends, your a little young dude with no friends
Then you go to the local shops and you see kids hassling his their dad
For money to buy sweets, the father doesn't want to, he wants to be together
Cause that way, he will wonder whether, he wants to stay with his kids
Or does his kids act like little wimps,
And in the background, his friend says this, listen everyone as a young dude will say
Everyone he is a little young dude guys sure mate
And then he lifts up his leg and shows them off to his friend
And then says your still a little young dude, don't try and be like us
You see dude, the real world is so tough, so stay inside being a little young dude, ******
After about 5 minutes of trying to push everyone together
He will put his foot down on the floor, your still a young dude, don't try and be like us
Your not a cool kid, or a cool man, and I said no, *******, I am a man
Your are just mucking with the men, ya stupid ****
Then he will put his foot on the floor and say again, your still a little young dude
You are too shy to be like us, buddy boy
I told him I am a man, I go on holidays and I work and I try to find something around town
Cool to hang around and be civilized, but I aren't a little young dude, mate, I am a big man
Then my friend said, no you are a little young dude, buddy
And before I say I am a man, another person says that there a man
And then says, no your a little young dude buddy, what's your fucken problem
You stupid little ******* monkey, you and your friend ain't like us
Let's muck with these two losers and treat them both like people we want to muck with
And my friend got really hyped up over it, and said, that I am a little young dude
And then I told him that I ain't a young dude anymore, but he said, yes you are
You are a young dude, and I told my friend to leave me the **** alone
I don't want to be a young dude, I want to be a man, who wants to be together
You are keeping me with you, no I don't want to be a little young dude
I am not shy, I know the shopping centres have heaps of hustle and bustle
And I know that everyone will move down the coast if it was cheap
And I also know that it has to be expensive because it's the only way they will make money
I know that the labor party helps the poor while liberals help their poor wallets
I don't want to stay down with this crazy friend who keeps stomping his foot down on
The floor and says your still a young dude, your not like us, he says with a really wingey voice, and he does that for about 15 minutes and the men say, leave him alone mate, he is not a man, he is still a little young dude, buddy boy, he will never be a young dude again
While you are thinking that, he sits in his house saying good mate, be a young dude
But then he will stomp his foot right on the ground, and say, your still a young dude
You see, I don't want him to treat me like a brother, cause I don't **** people off
I don't need people to treat me like a shy boy who knows nothing
And then he says to me, no your still a little young dude, mate
And I go f......u......c.........k, leave me alone mate, I am not young anymore,  nobody his ******* with me, so shut it

the little pink paper clamp


you see once upon a time there was a little pink paper clip

which had three anchors on it, one of them is blue, and

2 are black.   the anchors mean it keeps the paper from blowing

away, you see it opens really widely and it keeps all of your

personal papers from blowing away, but what i am doing

is saying, what will happen in the anchors wanted to move away

from the paper clip, like if one moved, it will lose 1 third of the power

and if it lost 2 anchors, they would lose 2 third of the power.

if it lost all three of the anchors, the power of the  paperclip will

lose all it’s power and the only way to get the anchors back is

go the ship dock and take some of the anchors there, sure it

might mean the ships haven’t got anchors but this paperclip needs

it anchors because it needs the power of which it brings.

at present the little pink paperclip without the anchors is sitting

at the bottom of the stationery desk hoping that one day the anchors

will come back so he can keep paper in a folder.

this was going to be a hard job, as the people thought the anchors

were way to heavy to carry home, despite the anchors being small

on the clip, so one man went out on a boat who was doing whale watching

and when they threw out the anchor, which incidentally was blue, and he had

to stay by the anchor, so when the tour was over, he took the anchor away

and the blue one goes in the middle of the paperclip, and then he walked around the

other ships to find 2 black anchors to give the paperclip a lot of power to keep the paper

down, but there was only one black anchor on every boat, so he rang up the company

to find a black anchor to make up the 3, but he took one black anchor to bring back to

the paperclip and it got two thirds of the power, but they were having a hard time

trying to find the other black anchor, you see they found a pink anchor, the same colour as

the paperclip, and they found a pink anchor but it was far to light, they found a green anchor

but it was like green cordial, so he went out again and he got a orange anchor, but no it wasn’t the one

and he bought a purple anchor, the same colour as black, but no way, this wasn’t working, none of these

anchors fitted on the paperclip, so they looked hard and wide, hoping they will find a black anchor

you see they needed to keep the paper from blowing away from everywhere around the office, and just

as we gave up for day, we found the second black anchor and we put it on the paperclip and it worked

the paper was tightly on the folder, and that is how they gave anchor power to the paperclip, but the only

problem is, the ships will miss their anchor, so we must go out to buy some for them, and we did, and

our paperclip hooked the paper together and every boat was anchored down, and everyone is happy.

you see in 2011 and 2012,, in around the time my cat lucky died, and my mate was getting

angry with his family, and told me that he hated to be my friend, and i remember that Scott

Mcdonald hated me mucking around the mall, and he died, and came back as lucky the cat

where he was having fun getting cranky with us, sometimes when we picked him up, and when

it rained, lucky would blame  dad for it, but scott was getting sick and tired of this, and created

voices from everyone that ****** me off, coming from people who didn’t, and my mate was slowly

turning off me, probably, scott/lucky’s spirit flying above, you see scott mcdonald owns pluto, in which

we call the love planet now, and from the love planet, scott sent voices into my head making my friend

say, i don’t want to be your friend anymore, don’t ring me, and also, scott mcdonald got into my head

trying to make me not understand my parents, which caused me to fight my parents, over silly things

and all because i was writing **** out of me, and when i went to adelaide in 2012, scott made my friend

not want to talk to me, this drove me nuts, and scott, said, i will **** lucky to make brian’s dad sane again

seeing lucky was in our family for brian,, which was a spiritual quest to see if brian can be calmed by animals

and scott, since i killed muscles due to mental illness, scott has been putting images into brian’s head

like turning lucky into a big cheetah or a big moo cow, and dad never understood, you see in 2013, my voices

at work became bad because lucky had died and scott needed to help me find him, and there was a pregnant girl

in the psych ward with me, who was carrying scott mcdonalds next life, cause i was doing what i did in 2004

and i did what i did, and scott used patricks voice kicking the girl, ya know like a baby does, saying let me out

let me out, brian is trying to be like me and this made the young lady feel weird, but she knew it was bnormal

and you see, as i get up, i hear voices all around saying, your shy brian, shut up woosey and the reason why i say

it was scott/lucky’s ghost because my friend didn’t hate, and also, scott put tabs on my phone, making it ring every

5 minutes making me write tickle tickle tim tum which got recorded on the telephone answer, and now, i can only

make calls, and not receive calls, because scott made andrew jarvis ring me up every day, and dad put a stop to that

with a bit of science from the third realm and while all this body problems, dad is on cloud 9, nursing lucky

saying, you can go off to the love planets, i have no idea if that lady’s baby survived or not, but buddha doesn’t want me to know that

but for dad, buddha wanted me to follow dads next life in instagram, saying, you know, nobody else

because, buddha said, we need to have your fathers next life protected, and you must never know who lucky is

unless fate brings you to him, you see the voices were really making me worked up, because i was keeping fit, 2004 and 2013

and the psych ward off i go, and instead of inning i do a brisk walk, which will keep me fit, you see as i write, i hear the negative me

from the 1990s calling out to me, GET ****** BRIAN, you are a little shy boy now brian, and many other things, like the time

i threw a spider on mum, she jumped, and i remember dad had a little laugh about that, with me, i remember i was swimming in the

pool, and mum squirted the fucken hose on me, because i was too fucken too noisy and i remember lucky being stuck up the trees

for a couple of days and scott’s spirit who was in lucky, previous life, ya know, well scott was getting sick of having his earth body with me, because

of my negativity because i was fat and i think scott mcdonald’s soul is in the young woman, if he or she survived

The fun I hear in my head



You see I hear my friends enjoying themselves with a lot of beer and also I hear them getting ****** every day and it can appear they are mucking with me through houses, you know Patrick was a real mans kid who was nice to sveryone, and even to me, even if I was to shy to express myself back then, but still he was cool with me, I still hear him being cool, ya know I am a bit of a **** at the moment, and I hear him saying to me that I am still getting teased, but really he is probably just mucking with his brothers and cousins and probably listening to man heavy metal and head banging their heads together, like they are very very cool.  You see I know it might be hard for me at first because my way at present to be cool, is different to his, and I know he might not want to do tapestries, cause to him he might feel like a little girl, you see I know Patrick prefers to be a man, no he is not dumb, I tease him at work because I like him, but I don't wanna tell him that, because I don't wanna preach to him, no Patrick should just enjoy himself, and not worry about me, you see I am 44 and I want to exercise so I can live longer, I know how I used to act, and anyone can plainly see, that the only way to  get through it all, is through creativity and I am so ****** cool


Sent from my iPhone

i will party all night dear, all night dear all night dear

i will party all night dear,  and there is nothing stand in my way

except for the realistic freaks realistic freaks realistic freaks

i want to party all night and not worry about bad things

i like Jimmy Barnes jimmy barnes jimmy barnes

he is a great singer, dude and he sings a great song

go the might of the sydney swans yeah they are the greatest yeah

i will party every night, to make you feel great

i will drink lots of champagne and lots of coke because i am cool

i am the coolest dude in canberra mate i have enough brains to make ya feel great

i feel like partying all night and all day long

party party party party party party al the body day long

i wanna put barnesy on for a party, and that is what i wanna do

partying is great and it doesn’t matter to me how many people are at the the event i am cool

i am cool enough for a party a party a party

i want to beat that drum and play them loud

send them off to an imaginary crowd cause my imagination is great mate

party all ****** day, and move on oh yeah

i don’t listen to adults mate saying don’t do that don’t do this

i just humour them and do what i wanna do because i am ****** cool man, eat my shorts

i wish to buddha that people would say that i am pretty cool

i wanna party party party all day long to barnesy, real loud

i don’t care if i have to stand up at concerts cause i am cool man

i am cooler than anyone i wanna really party

i don’t want to reform, i want to party to jimmy barnes on australia day

i am not there to cause trouble, i am just the coolest dude in canberra

party party party party party all ****** night long dude

partying is my middle name, my second name is control and control means

i am too cool for the yellers, cause i don’t want be yelled at, i am sooooo cooooool dude

The Paul dachs poem

You see that **** said I will get a job in Tuggeranong ACTEW
And I was looking forward to that but then some other **** came in and grabbed my job from under me and I felt like killing Paul dachs because he took the job I wanted ever so much boy is that man such a fucken ****
You see I was trying to learn
The ropes of that job
And bleeding Paul said no mate
But instead you have to work at the sewage treatment plant
And expect a lift at the end of the road
**** **** *******
Paul dachs is a total *******
He promised a job in Tuggeranong
And gave me a job at the sewage treatment plant
Which I liked till I lost my mind
Because nobody was picking me up
You see I decided to quit my day job and work on my art and writing because I feel quite relaxed and my imagination is jumping up and down
And I don't care how I treat Paul dachsy poo he is just a figmit of my past and I should not go back there because Paul dachs is a stupid poo face of a fucken ****
You see I really wanted that job
It was giving me the Chance to move on with my life
But good old Paul dachsy said
Let's give Brian a job much closer to his home with no buses going down there, and
I wish that Paul dachs gets a lesson in life saying what job are you getting us ya fucken poo face old clown
I was really looking forward
To that job and Paul thought it was too far out
I hate that dachsy poo
******* ya fucken ****
You Paul dachs ****
You were supposed to give me a job but you gave it tribey dude and that made me feel so wrong and I think you are a big rich **** and I want to never work for you again


Sent from my iPhone

peanut butter peanut butter

is good for your ma and good for ya papa

you see i put peanut butter on bread

abour 23 times, i buy 2 loaves of bread

and i make 23 peanut butter sandwiches

i enjoy it, as the peanut butter sticks to the bread

and my mouth, i love peanut butter sandwiches

they are very nice for me to eat

but it’s high in fat and eating too many peanut butter sandwiches

can be fatal, you see i look like a little young dude

walking aroung with white sox and a tracksuit

eating my peanut butter sandwiches

you see i vision young women or men put

peanut butter all over their legs

to make a pornographic movie

i visioned a young mate mark ward legs

sticky like peanut butter

peanut butter peanut butter very sticky as you bite

get your mouth sticking together

i remember those days of going to the kitchen up and back up and back

making peanut butter sandwiches i still want that

but if had it now, i would get up to 170 kilos

so if you eat peanut butter peanut butter

it is great to enjoy a spread of peanut butter

to enjoy every day and night

Babies babies they are so cute you see
I love babies yeah they are very cute
You see they sit in their crib
And they really in a cute way they cry
You see babies are cute
They keep their parents up all night
And they do all their baby talk
To each and every other baby in sight
You see they look cute
You ****** beaut
Babies are very cute
The cutest in the land
Babies babies the cutest in the land
They are so very tiny, dude
As they cry all day and night
Their parents get *******
Their bodies feel very rough
And they are too tiny to be tough but they are cute
And you ****** beaut
Babies are the best
I like babies because they are ****** cute
The babies cry for attention
Too many times to mention
But they are cute you ****** beaut
Cute little babies yeah
Babies babies are the cutest yeah they look so cute and
You can really admire them yeah they like the words tickle tickle Tum Tum and around and around the garden begging everybody's pardon
Babies are cute and really true blue babies are very cute
And they sit there saying goog goo gah gah
Babies are the cutest humans in this very good land

THE GREAT POOL TOURNAMENT



we are here at the Green bay packers football club, for the annual pool competition

and we have a great line up of pool champions from simon o’heary and brendan itato,

they are the players who fought it out in last years final, and this year promises to be a bumper

of a tournament.    


the first match is between samuel patrice and johnny carter, and samuel gets the break which is a beauty

knocking the number 14 in first and then knocked the number 12 in next and his third go, he attempted to

knock the number 9 in but missed by a whisker

and then johnny had his go, and he is on smalls, yep he missed the pocket with the first shot by the skin of his teeth

so samuel lined up with his next shot and knocked the 15v and the number 9 in, and only had 16, 10 and 11 to go

before the black ball, samuel was on a roll, and then samuel knocked the number 10 in, and there was no way he was

going to lose this game, no way, but then he knocked the 16 in and then straight away knocked the 11 in and then he was

on the 8 ball, and if he knocks this one in, the game is won, and the black was right near the hole, which was easy for samuel to sink

and he sank it, and samuel won, and johnny carter was out yet again, and samuel moved onto the next round, where he played the

winner of the other table, who was phillip cutherhead, and this was promising to be a promising match, so the referee tossed the coin

and phillip won and decided to break, and when he did he sent the ***** to 7th heaven, you see phillip beat 17 year old colin hayes,

who was hoping to ****** up the tournament, and when we interviewed colin, man, he was very disappointed but he knew that this year

wasn’t his year, samuel had the second shot, and by geez, he couldn’t have whacked a more perfect shot knocking the number 6 in the left

middle pocket, radical, samuel continued to show style by knocking 4 in right bottom and 3 in left middle and 5 in left middle and 2 in middle right

and 1 in middle left and 7 in middle right and then knocked the 8th in to win this easily.

the next game started with samuel and his opponent harry burns knocking each ball in 1 by 1 and samuel ended up winning this close match by a flukey

knock of the number 13 and the next shot on the 8th meant if you miss this you are going to harry’s  turn so he knocked it in and samuel went to the bar

to rest up till his next game.and watch the match to see his next opponent, and the match was between brendan schultz and simon weather by and brendan

broke and it was a ****** powerful shot and simon was left wondering what hit him, brendan was the third best last year and he was determined to become

2 times better and simon wanted to set a trap for brendan, so to speak, he had some tricks lined up, and brendan wasn’t shy to display these shots in the match

brendan did a trickshot knocking number 14 in middle right and 9 in bottom left and 12 in middle left all at once, which left simon completely speechless,

brendan ended up winning and was waiting for simon to finish his losers interview, so he can talk about that win, simon told the press a pack of wild bulls

couldn’t beat brendan in this match and then he congratulated brendan, brendan was happy to be in the final against samuel to see who comes 1st or 2nd


1.  they played the national; anthem of the USA

2.  Samuel and brendan stood back to back and the referee was standing behind them

3.  10 year old benjamin whaler tossed the coin to see who will break in the tournament final, brendan won and chooses to break

4.  brendan and simon had a arm wrestle in the lead up and on with the GAME in this bumper grand final


brendan broke and by geez he broke a beauty and knocked the 11 ball in and is on bigs, the next shot, brendan scattered all the ***** on

every corner of the table, and samuel had his next shot, and can’t believe he missed everything forcing brendan to have 2 shots, must be nerves

from the other two wins, brendan’s first shot knocked 16 and 5 in, which ruined the 2 shots that samuel gave him, samuel was very excited, he went

straight over to knock the 3 ball in and then knocked the 7 ball in and then nearly knocks the 4 ball in, but didn’t, and after that brendan sank the white ball

which gave samuel 2 shots, let’s hope he doesn’t do what brendan did, samuel concentrated very hard hitting the 3 ball in and then 1 ball in and then

the 6th ball in and then knocked the 2 ball, and without knowing it samuel was looking like winning the tournament, as he was 1 ball away from winning

the tournament, and samuel had his next shot but there was a lot of pressure, he sank the white and gave brendan 2 shots, which made brendan have

to concentrate, because he couldn’t make a mistake because samuel was on the 8 ball, brendan did a trick shot sinking 9 ball into middle left side and 10 ball

into middle right and 15 into right bottom, and then did another trick shot knocking 11 ball in the left middle pocket and 12 ball in the right middle pocket and

13 ball in the right corner pocket and 14 ball in the middle left, and both samuel and brendan were both on the 8th, the next whot brendan missed the right bottom pocket

and samuel had his shot and sank the black right into the top right pocket, which gave sam the tournament and brendan went out of the building refusing to talk to any member

of the press, the next step was



1.  brendan congratulated sam on his great win

2.   sam gets the trophy and says thanks to the crowd for making this all possible

the speech

i didn’t think i would win that last match

brendan was putting on some very good shots

and if it wasn’t for him missing that last shot

i wouldn’t’ have the chance, THANKS EVERYONE

and then sam held the cup over his head, and did a lap of honour around the pool hall, , and then the announcer said samuel, you are the best

and we will see you next year

GOODBYE

I hated when I said goodbye to my cleaner and headed off to the hawker shops and there was this man and woman there who appeared to be nice but the man was squeezing his rope very hard as if he was going to **** me
You see I don't get killed by them I know I muck around differently to others but that is no reason to look like you are going to strangle me
You see all I am wanting to do
Is live my life and have tun
But I found these people very scary I don't want to be scared of life
And I don't want get killed by people
I know dad isn't around anymore to protect me
But I want people to stop trying to **** me
I was hearing voices from dad and my brother and mates saying we must go up to heaven and spurt money down to the poor even if it means steal a bottle of drink and leave the money on the pavement
I know I went to the psych award and I might have annoyed people in there
But that is no reason to **** me
Or I know I pretended to root this woman at the Australia Day concert but I shouldn't get killed for that that was pure fun
I don't believe in being nasty to people so why are you trying to **** me
Why are you trying to figure out where I live
I was enjoying myself in 2013 until the psych ward thing happened
I don't know how to behave in there
I can't be like my mates
I would like people to stop and think
Please don't **** me with your rope
I love this life too much to wanna end it yet

In an old place at the edge of the world there was this psych ward where people would go if they can't fit into society
In this psych ward there was Peter yetta who was in there for
Disturbing the peace
You see he had a mental illness for years now and he was in and out of that dreaded place and he played shows in his room forcing people to knock on his door telling him to shut up
Because Peter was a tad too noisy and there was another patient who was John knight
Who was a huge danger to himself because he thinks his life stinks despite his parents saying he should love life
And he mainly sat in his room
Writing suicidal stories which made the staff worry even more
And that is the reason why he isn't allowed to leave John and Peter got on together and then there was tom kennel who was a huge heavy metal fan, so much in fact he wrote stories saying for satan to destroy the world and get rid of the staff and patients in this ward and tom had no friends in there but as a matter of fact he had no mates on the outside either
And tom walked up and down the psych ward yelling I am Satan and I am here to destroy each of your lives
There was this crazy lady who claimed she was kidnapped away from her cats she lives on the outside with but she was totally loopy and she yelled out saying I want to **** Bart Simpson and I want to **** any boy who bonds with their father claiming they are doing guy stuff and she got in fights with all the guys in the ward saying
You put me in here so you could **** my cats and her name was Rita smoothe and she hated her life and everything about this ward and young 18 year old Simon, oh well what can we say about him he held his entire college at gunpoint saying I want you all to die and he refused to sleep in his room
Because he thought the boogy man was after him when he slept and if anyone made heim go to his room he would become very violent with anyone who is around at the time sometimes they left him and sometimes they would call in the guards and lock him in
Isolation for about 4 days Simon yelled saying help help kidnap kidnap but nobody listened and I was trying to get up and I felt like I was going to die, it seems I am stuck in this psych ward and these crazy patients forever and it could be
That I have diabetes and not much time left or it could be
My experiences in the psych ward were bad and I don't want to go back
You see my nose in blocked and
I am being pushed out of my dreary life by the forces that made me mentally ill
I want to finish and do many more tapestries before I die
I am trying to get out and walk
I feel pretty good
Like a real family person should
I feel itches in my stomach of the angels pf the psych ward
Trying to say don't return to the psych ward because it is bad
And you will meet people like these **** in here

It started with Richmond beating Carlton and some **** was punching people in the crowd and the tiger land song was playing very loud in the end
Collingwood put it right up to Geelong
But the cats won in the end
Melbourne for the first time were a premiership threat but the power brought that down toward the ground
By beating the demons and the crows weren’t good enough to beat the hawks at their home ground and the dogs beat the swans despite swans getting within 4 with 4 to go but the dogs were too strong and after the west coast eagles winning last years premiership the Brisbane lions were too good for them at the Gabba and despite Gold Coast keeping it close
The saints were just too good in the end and GWS got a record score in beating the bombers, we saw the bombers get bombed by the giants foot and finally the Roos weren’t good at all or was it that Fremantle were too good and that was how the afl started and I hope your team won
Well some people aren’t happy with their team but that is footy for ya

The Raiders show raiders v st george at GIO Stadium

    with johnny brown and Sue Longways




johnny’   welcome dudes to GIO stadium to this match between the dragons and the raiders and this is going to be a

great match, the raiders are 11th and the dragons are at 14, and whoever wins, I can guarantee it will be a spectacle

and i have Pete from Hawker with us now with a poem for us, hoping to get the Raiders into top swing

Pete”    ok dudes let’s swing it

you see the bad and mean green machine, big and strong and fast and mean

you see you shouldn’t try and stop these men in green, cause we are 3 positions higher than the opposition

Johnny’  well, short but sweet, and have you been worried about form in some matches

Pete’   well, yes, but that makes no difference, the raiders are going to win dudes, i will sing it again

you see we are the bad and mean green machine, big and strong and fast and mean

you see you shouldn’t try and stop these men in green, cause we are 3 positions higher than the opposition

Johnny’   well thanks Pete and now here is Sue Longways with another fine poem from the crowd

Sue’   thanks Johnny and what a great atmosphere here at GIO Stadium today, a great twilight match, and everyone

is in fine voice to cheer the raiders to beat the dragons tonight, and here is John Barten from Queanbeyan and he hates

how the Raiders went to Canberra all those years ago, so he sings a dragons tune

John’   go the dragons go the dragons

go the mighty dragons team

you see it’s only early in the season

go the mighty dragons cause the raiders moved here

I know we shouldn’t hold a grudge, mate, but i am and there is nothing you can do oh no

go the mighty dragons and i will go for them till the Raiders go back to Seiffert Oval, dudes

Sue”   thanks John and now here is Harold from Lyneham

Harold’   i am the bad and mean raiders fan

we supply the best coming out of the can

you see i go to the footy with mates george and dan

you see we’ll hit ya hit ya hit ya the mighty green machine

Sue’  thanks Harold and now here is the Raiders team, bring on the team

Jordan Rapana and Sisa Waqa and Jarrod Croker and Jarrad kennedy and edrick lee and blake austin and Mitchell Cornish


and Shannon Boyd and Josh Hodgson and Dane Tilse and Josh Papali and Sia Solicia and Shaun Fensom

and the 4 interchange players  Josh McRone and Frank-Paul Nuuausala and Paul Vaughan and Luke Bateman

and now here is Ken from Symonston with his poem

Ken”   i have been coming out to the GIO stadium every time we play

you see it’s fun when we win, but when we lose, we certainly do ****** pay

and the main thing about it is, we beat the easy teams and beat the hard teams but never at the best time

come on Raiders, it’s surely the time to win, oh ****** yeah


sue”   thanks Ken and now here is Rob with his jingle

Rob”     Run Raiders run

as we charge onto the GIO stadium yeah

run raiders run you see we have the team, we’ll win oh yeah

yeah we will come a running, and score a hundred tries

yeah that will be so cool,

run raiders run, oh yeah the Raiders are the team to beat i hope

run raiders run

they are the team that will thrash the opposition yeah

you see we won one and lost one

run raiders run

yeah the mighty raiders, will be our son of a gun

Sue”    thanks Rob for that and now here is the dragons team


first is Peter Mata’utia and Etonia Nabuli and Dan Nielson and Dylan Farrell and Jason Nightingale

and gareth Widdop and Benji Marshall and Leeson Ah Mau and Mitch Rein and George Rose

and Tyson Frizell and Joel Thompson and Jack de Belin

and the interchange men are trent Merrin and Heath L”Estrange and Rory O’Brien and Mike Cooper and Jake Marketo

and here is Mike from Jerrabomberra with his jingle

oh yeah those dragons yeah, they win more than the raiders yeah

they supply all the tries, in fact more tries than the locals, why don’t they win the grand

well i think i know, it’s because we lose our playing ability after thrashing the raiders here and anywhere

so go the dragons, go the mighty dragons, the right team to win the match

sue’   ok thanks Mike and now here is Keith from Latham with his song

carn the carn the carn the mighty raiders team, please dudes don’t make us say **** mate

make our raiders team win, carn the raiders carn the raiders, watch our team win well

on our home ground see, go the mighty raiders for a great victory

ya see i live in Latham and in my lounge room i have raiders cushions and raiders tables and heaps

of videos too including the great grand final victories in ’89 and “91 and the great ‘94

they haven’t won a grand final since in the first grade oh no

but if they win a few games where they don’t drop the ball too much

they will play so ****** hard, GO THE RAIDERS, DUDES

Sue’   ok that is it for me, and now back to Johnny

Johnny”  thanks Sue for telling us the teams and letting us hear some great home truths, let’s hope the

Raiders can win tonight, and now here is ?Bob from Cook with a jingle

Bob’   go the raiders go the raiders, do ya reckon we have the stamminer to win today

go the raiders go the raiders, should we win, should we win

twinkle twinkle raiders pack, how i wonder whether you’ll win

up above the GIO park tonight, make sure we clean this game free of fights

twinkle twinkle raiders pack, go the raiders through and through

Johnny’ thanks Bob and now here is Ernie from Higgins with his rhyme

hey ****** ****** the dragons are ready, are they going to win

all have the raiders put all their dropping the ball crap in the flaming bin

Shaun Fensom laughed at this little rhyme, as hopefully the raiders grab the 2 points

Johnny’  thanks Ernie and first my tip, well to the ladder, i say Raiders, on current form, well raiders be 6, could be more

and who do you support Sue

Sue’    well to the ladder, the Raiders, but on current form, dragons by 2, but i could change

Johnny”   ok, we’ll be back at half time, ok, here on the Raiders show

GO THE CANBERRA RAIDERS

The raiders show

V parramatta April 14 2019


Hi everyone and welcome to the raiders show where the mighty Canberra raiders are playing the pride of the parramatta eels and seeing the raiders have won 3 lost 1 it is going to be a thrilling match and we start the entertainment with Joel from waramanga

We are the bad and mean green machine fearsome men from the ACT
We will trample over the eels today
And we will hit ‘em fight ‘em
Even if biff wasn’t allowed
I want no red I want no blue
No purple pink or orange too
There is just one colour and
That will do
The fighting men from the green machine
Come on Canberra
We have to win tonight
If we don’t put up a fight
The side will fade away fade away
Like an old rusty coin
We are the bad and mean green machine fighting fit
We are looking mean
As our opponents will be seeing green
When we beat ‘em beat ‘em and that will be the end

Thank you Joel a very good version of the green machine song and now here is Barry from Curtin

Go go the raiders
The mighty green machine
We will be up there fighting
We will never be lean
Come on raiders you are the best
Watch out eels we will put you
To the test
Go go the raiders
Better than the worst
Go go the raiders
I think I see an eel trying to first
That won’t happen because the
Raiders are great
Go raiders go raiders
The team of today
Go go the raiders
Let’s finish the round with a bang
Carn the mighty raiders
Watch the raiders burst up a Bang
That will be the eels when they lose today
Go the mighty raiders mate
Better than the rest

Thank you Barry and yes it will be fantastic to see the raiders win today
And now here Bradley from Dunlop

In an era of upsets
Good and bad can occur
But the mighty Canberra raiders
Will fight right till they are through
With strong players who perform at their best
Those players will put eels to the test
It is going to be great cool and totally rad
The raiders this year have been far from bad
Yes those eels will be at their best
But the raiders are going to put them to the test
You see we are the mighty green machine fast and mean and fighting fit
We ain’t scared of the eels
Not one little bit
Thank you Bradley
And I am saying to you that
Raiders are great
Raiders are strong
They play their best even if the game is long
They will fight the eels
They will never squeal
Come on raiders go go go
Come on raiders
Win on my raiders show
And after this break the start of the match go the raiders the lead we’ll catch ok here is the match between the green machine and the eels

Welcome back to the raiders show and now we have the half time entertainment with Keith from Monash

Yes it started like this, raiders pushing for the try line trying so hard and parramatta trying their best to get tries and when they got their first try they were happy and converted the try to make it 6-0 and the eels were finding it hard to get a try even a forward pass stopped them from breaking through and the raiders
Scored a penalty goal to make it 8-0
At the break go the raiders kick some *** go the raiders show some class
Go the raiders in 2019

Thank you Keith and now jimmy from O’Malley

Come on raiders come on come on
Come on raiders come on
We are the green machine
We are fighting fit in the ACT
If you stop us from finding our feet
We will hit ya hit ya hit ya
The eels will be toast
Croker kicked 2 awesome goals
And the raiders look awesome too
Anyhow
We fight out our aggression
The eels will be a suffering
But who cares we have the half time lead
Come on raiders come on come on
Come on raiders come on
Yes they will win this match and if
We play well the premiership
Which mightn’t be so much
Out of the raiders reach
To win 4 th game tonight will be awesome go raiders go
Thank you jimmy and now
Back to the match go raiders win the 4 th match of the year

Welcome back to the raiders show and what a great win by the raiders
19 to nil, the first time the raiders to nil twice in 5 rounds since 1990, what a win it had turned out to be and now here Harry from Braddon

Go the raiders go the raiders
Raiders clap clap clap
Raiders clap clap clap
It was a match that was very good
Beating parramatta to nil
It was an interesting match my friend
Go the mighty raiders oh yeah
We had an 8-0 lead at half time And then in the second we just went with it
The eels made too many mistakes
What a game it was go the mighty mighty raiders oh yeah
We have the broncos next week
And if we play like this
There will be a chance
All we need to push ourselves right
And knock the broncos around
Yes that is what we need to do
Raiders clap clap clap
Raiders clap clap clap
The raiders have played well this year so far will they keep it up

Thank you harry, and let’s hope they keep it up and now here is John from ainslie

Raiders clap clap clap
Raiders clap clap clap
What an opening this has turned out
To be
The best start the raiders have had
And holding the eels to nil too yo
What a fantastic win
Let’s pile on the pressure raiders
And knock the broncos back home
We are the green machine
Let’s hope we can show the youth of today why they called us the green machine
I remember back then it was great it was great
Ooh I need to get home at half past 8
But I can sing about the raiders all night
Let’s go to parramatta leagues club
And get in a fight
Raiders clap clap clap
Raiders clap clap clap
Raiders are the team to watch in 2019

Thank you John and now our last entertaining number of the night is Imogen from hawker

Come on raiders
Kick some ***
Come on raiders
Tonight you showed some class
The lord was looking down on you
One try and an almighty 2 and
3 and then a great field goal
Taking the heart out of your soul
I have been a raiders fan
For such a long time
So let’s cheer and cheer
Them over the line
Raiders clap clap clap
Raiders clap clap clap
Kicking *** tonight

Thank you Imogen and now we must go, see you next week against the broncos let’s hope raiders win 5 well we have to just see and now time for the final curtain see you next time on the raiders show

And now we draw the final curtain
And the raiders won their 4th
Out of 5 games it was like fucken war
And next week we face the broncos
Let’s hope we win, I hope so
We need to celebrate Easter
With a win go the Canberra raiders
Yeseree
See you next week everybody

The raiders show v manly April 28 2019


Hi everyone and welcome to the raiders show on a year where we have won 5 out of 6 wins with their only loss was against the Melbourne storm
And today should be a great test to see if Canberra raiders are good enough to go further this year I personally think raiders have the guts to win it, but only time will tell ok let’s start the jingles and poems and cheers here is the first from Oliver

We are the mighty raiders
We will fight for what is right
Pushing for a premiership
In 2 0 1 9
Are we good enough
Well I think we are
But today we must pass manly
Because they seem the best
As they play the green machine song
To start the match
Everyone will cheer the raiders name
Saying we will win hands down
But at the stroke of 4-00
The question of whether the raiders are good enough will be answered
Go raiders go

Thank you Oliver and now here is Andy billims with a festive footy song

It is the football season oh yeah
And the raiders team will enter the field ready to show manly who if boss
And they want manly to have a loss
At brookvale oval today
The crowd is getting ready to
Wave their flags saying go raiders
We must win but to those manly
Supporters out there
We will win this mighty match
Go raiders go for us
As the supporters and players
Are riding the bus
Yes we are going to win we will never
Give in to those manly sea eagles
It is the football season
And the green machine
Is looking fast and mean
Never lean, we are mighty keen
To best the sea eagles yeah
And at the chime of 4-00
Raiders will see the truth
Of whether they win or lose

Thank you Andy and let’s hope raiders do win this afternoon against manly and now here is our next jingle poem or cheer from Patrick

G’day dudes my name is pat
Ready to cheer the raiders on
To beat manly and that is that
You see we have strong players
Who play very well
And Ricky Stuart will push us to the limit yeah
We have beaten teams who were once pretty good
And if we lose, guess who will be in a bad mood
I will yell at friends and family
C’mon raiders for this victory
We have in the past been
Known as the faders
But this year is different
We are the mighty raiders
We will raid your park as
We raise the roof
I know the raiders can excite us
I just want proof
Go raiders go raiders go raiders go

Thank you Patrick and here’s hoping we can all get together this afternoon to cheer hard for the Canberra raiders
Here is Jarred with his poem

Go raiders we are the best
We will put the eagles to the test
Coming up to provide the best
But the manly side will never rest
You see Canberra need to work ****** hard
Burning off the extra lard
From all the times the raiders have lost
C’mon raiders beat the hosts
Go raiders go

Thank you jarred and now off to the first half go the mighty raiders beat the eagles

Welcome back to the raiders show for the half time entertainment and what a match we have with the raiders leading manly by just 2 points, 14-12
And now here is ken with a jingle

Wighton wighton
You are the best mate
Two tries for the green machine
You are the one who is bad and mean
Wighton wighton
Everybody says your awesome dude
You need to score more though
If a win against manly is on the cards
Wighton wighton
Congratulations and celebrations
As the manly side scored their second try right at the last minute through former raiders Lachlan croker
Go the raiders we can’t give up
If we drop the ball we will choke choke choke come on raiders we must win today the mighty green machine
Will hopefully make manly pay
Thank you ken and now here is joe with his input

Fighting strong the green machine
We are the pride of the ACT
We are up by just 2 points
We need to provide more pressure
Yes we do
Don’t want no red or even blue
No orange or maroon too
We will see if the green machine
Will knock manly out in this game
But the pressure is coming over Canberra yeah
We fight we rise and we conquer
All over the place
We need to win c’mon raiders to win
Send manly off the field licking their wounds go raiders go

Thank you joe and now the second half between the raiders and sea eagles
Go raiders go
We will fight and we will win
Go raiders go
We will send manly to the sin bin
Go raiders go
Will wighton score his third
C’mon raiders win this match
Right now

Welcome back to the raiders show
And what a pretty ordinary performance from the raiders with manly winning 24 points to 20 and despite all the talk of the commentators saying they won from their last try, they made a mistake which ran down the clock for manly
Here is Tom

Go manly go manly go the mighty sea eagles
Winning is the way we do it
Go the eagles yeseree
I can answer the question mate
What is wrong with the raiders now
The second half of Canberra was crap and manly made the most of it
By becoming no sap
Go manly go manly
Go the mighty eagles yeah
We win only by 4 but a win none the less

Thank you Tom and congratulations to your team and I hope the raiders can bounce back next week, well hope so anyway and now here is Lyle with his jingle

Poor raiders lost their second match
Poor raiders having problems with their performance
It isn’t that good
Manly too strong
And raiders fell into a hole
The first half was good for raiders
But the second half went down
It is a 80 minute game not 40
The raiders faded away
What was wrong what was wrong
Raiders have been beaten for the second time
If we are to make the finals mate
We have to play a 80 minute game

Thank you Lyle and now here is Keith

The raiders played such **** in
The second half
Their performance in the second half was as woeful as can be
What happened to the side that has been winning in the last few weeks
Will we see them again
Well I hope so
I ****** well hope so
They need to win again
Just when you think the raiders
Were finals bound
They play a woeful match
In the second half
And to make a good position in the finals
They need to play better than that
Well done manly
I am a great sport
I hope the raiders can bounce back
And no more fade away

Thank you Keith and now it is time to go, it is beer o’clock there is no more

And now we draw the final curtain
What happened to the raiders mate
Normally this year we sing their praises now we have to lick our wounds
Join us next week for our mcdonalds park match with Penrith the mighty mountain men
I hope we could win that
It will be a great great match
But after our woeful second half
We need to bounce right on back to
Keep on track

Manly. 24
Raiders 20

i hate these people on youtube

picking parts of my good writing

and using it against me

yeah i have made mistakes

and yeah i have problems

but i don’t care, boy don’t i care

you see i don’t remember swearing at 11 year old girls

i wish people would understand i am being cool

no, i support women’s rights

and probably people are living in the past

you see the computer is living in the past

why are people living in the past with me

i am the coolest dude in canberra

i hate donald trump because he is an idiot

who is always putting someone down

i hate tony abbott because he talks so much crap

and i liked julia gillard but it was a revolving door

and yes, i said revolving door, it doesn’t mean i vote liberal

i am an ALP voter, always will

i hate geeks who just get on the computer just once and say i hate loving life

i drink orange juice and i am no longer a coke drinker

i am still a youtube ****** but these past living geeks think they are big tough robots

but yeah they are tough, and i don’t want to fight anyone

i am not gay, even if i may have targeted boys, i was a ******

but now i am battling those voices but i was a bad person

but that doesn’t mean i am still a bad person

no i am a nice person, who really loves life

i see men smiling as if i hate life, they are wrong

you see, i wish buddha would allow me to get out of my past

i don’t want to dwell in the past, but, dudes, i think these people don’t have many friends

so they are trying to express themselves on the internet

they might be poor, they might be rich, but they pick a comment and say

you are not a nice person, and i say, i am nicer than them

you see the other day i looked like my friend, hearing his voice saying goodbye

maybe he was teasing me about everything he said

but i liked him, because he was nice to me

it seems ever since my awful day in 1990

i have been treated like someone i hate, but i am too cool to **** myself

despite hearing voices of me not being welcome on the earth

but that is just a load of complete crap because i belong on this earth just like them voices in my head

i like canberra, because i know how to get home safely

dude, i like tim min chin, i know he sings about very delicate issues

but he knows that and he just let’s it out

you see, i remember not knowing about the names young dudes call their victims

and sometimes their victims can’t cope and they **** themselves

and i know they go to another life but still, these bullies don’t understand

i love life, because i say what i want and if you really having problems

just listen to me past livers, if you have something to complain about

get off the computer and get back to the table, because you are obviously spending too much time on the computer anyway

i am a red red robin who said, live life to the full

i might not be a good fighter but i don’t try to fight,

i am showing you my unique style of poetry sort of like tim min chin

i hated being treated like the worlds little teasie

but overall i am cool, it’s the past living computer geeks that has the problem, mate

Im in the real world



I'm in the real world, I'm in the real world
Just relaxing here doing my tapestry
You see people going out trying to hard to get away from their past
But that doesn't mean much to me
You see I'm in the real world, I'm in the real world
The posh and conservative life doesn't work for me
Cause I am in the real world, enjoying the real world
And I know I am respected and I don't care what the people who don't, think
Cause I am in the real world, the good old life of the real world
Yes, that is definately the right place for me
You see when I go to a pub just to have a drink, you see
And everyone seems to be teasing you,ok
And I don't worry about that, oh no
Cause I'm in the real world, the good old real world
And that is the place I want to stay
You see I have this imagination, man
And it makes me feel so happy, and
I watch the news and see people being robbed
And that makes me so unhappy, oh yeah
And that was the thing that made the real world seem hard
And I was feeling very bad, and my mind was afloat
And I wanted to stay with the crowd
I was putting on weight, being as slow and weak
And I was as negative as fucken ****
But I fucken turned my life around
And started to do exercise, and that made me so happy
Because now I can unleash my imagination
And be apart of both worlds, the real and imiginary
And then I feel so happy as can be
Cause whether people think that the world ain't happy
**** them, cause I am now in the real world
The mighty mighty real world, I am the happiest as can be
No turning back, oh yeah, let's get down

Jesus is dead
Jesus is dead
A sad day for all
Our saviour is dead
They nailed him to the cross
Disciples eating fish
Our saviour is dead
Sad sad sad
Everybody gathers round
To say goodbye to our saviour
Everybody says Jesus you’ll be missed
The next day was Saturday and
Jesus was gone for a day
Nobody knowing what the future
Without Jesus actually will be like
God was working through the day
Thinking about Jesus a lot
And at night said to Jesus
I will bring you back oh yeah
Jesus wasn’t sure of what god meant
But the next day was Sunday
Where a surprise was going to happen
The cross was brought back
In front of the desciples
And as soon as they are gathering around
A surprising thing happened
Jesus has risen
Jesus has risen
A great day for all when
Jesus has risen
Drink my blood and eat my body
I am alive for all of you
I have risen to save you from your sins
Welcome back
To Jesus, we thought you were dead my lord
Welcome back
To Jesus, but it is great you will be waiting for us in eternity
Welcome back Jesus
You are our lord
Jesus has risen

The reason why I fall
The reason why I fall, mate
The reason why I fall
The reason why I fall, mate
You see you don’t concentrate
On things around you
You just walk right in front
Who cares what people say
You see you will go
Head over turkey
Some falls could be cool
Some could be quirkey
The reason why you fall
The reason why you fall, mate
You could trip over cement
*** over head
Crash into someone walking
Their dog down the street
You see it’s crazy to fall that way
Just go home to eat your curbs and weigh
You see you could crash into a man
Whose 320 kg
You try to say sorry
But he said the first word
The first word said watch it, mate
The reason why you fall
The reason why you fall, mate
Pick a good girl to go on a date
The reason why you fall
The reason why you fall, mate
You fall because you are unfit
And you need to push those carbs

This red rooster is a bundle of fun bundle of fun yes it is cool and fun
This red rooster is a bundle of fun
I love life and this red rooster is having peas and gravy too
Cool man eat my shorts like bart
Would say and the red rooster said to me have a cup of coffee
Drinking it right now that sounds great, and then we eat a chicken pie and we think about this red rooster is a bundle of fun don’t forget the Sydney roosters are done
Never gonna win never gonna win I hope the red rooster has a bundle of fun with me and you
And if we think about it the rooster is cool and it is not the Sydney roosters they are not
And the red rooster wants and deserves to have fun
Every single day and night
You see the devil is going to say just one word give me some red rooster and a dollar coin
Yes that sounds great mate

the argument of the universe, ends the life of youtube sensation, caleb



in the great saturn club rings on thursday october 1 2015m peter sargent and ted bundy

had a very strong argument which really was beginning to turn nasty, first ted ******* paul berenyi

and snatched greame thorne and adam walsh, making their earth bodies really shook up

you see greame thorne is me, brian allan from canberra and adam walsh is some young man who was

killed by the parramatta terrorist and peter sargent came up to ted bundy, and said, stop this, i mean

you should stop this, and ted said, i am slowing the earth down, so you will be good to mind your own business

but peter said, neh, i don’t want to let you win, you see my earth body is a cool boy, never to be killed, you

will never get us ted bundy, ted bundy grabbed peter by the arm saying, watch what you say, buddy, but peter

really wanted to slow down teds reign, because this is weird what the world has been going through since you died

first you made brian allan a crazy person by making him tie himself up in a toilet in mitchell, and can’t you see he is suffering

too much from that stupid mistake your ghost made him do and it was awful to push his next door neighbour brendan down as well,

brian really liked him, and me, you made me **** myself when i was having problems that you caused, and ted said, but you are

enjoying being a cool boy now, don’t jeopardise it, dude, but peter kept on yelling blaming him for all the suicides that happened like

anthony, the mentally ill christian, and barry loughton as well as mark jones, and i know these deaths were normal, but you are the reason why

they are dead, ted, and i hate what you are doing to brian allan from canberra lately, he likes watching his grandmas next life annie be with slim dusty

who is hayley, and me who is caleb, but you are trying to **** him, by making his old school chin patrick enright, in his mind, tease him in his mind

treating him like his family, by making him lose interest in things, and peter told ted, he hates what you are putting in brian’s mind, by killing off all the

old fogies one by one, you see brian’s aunty pam developed a cancer of the lung, giving her no energy, she never smokes, and peter told ted that

he hates dads dellusional ghost trying to make brian write and think evil things about his father, and peter said, you will never get my current earth body

he plays baseball and really enjoys being a youtube sensation, peter said to ted bundy, you see what you are doing is destroying the world, including

my beloved canberra, where i met brian and chris allan, who played cricket with me, and i hate how you are making brian tease his dad with the poor people

i know he doesn’t want to be a rich ****, but some of the situations were very dodgy, and i want you to let brian allan be a man, ya know, i know he still likes

cricket despite of what he tells people, and ted bundy, at about 7 on the 1st october, struck caleb from bratayley down, by grabbing his cool kid, and tying him up

on the sun with paul berenyi and adam walsh and greame thorne, and the way he did this, was grab peter sargent by the arm and say, you are no longer a youtube sensation

by grabbing you, i **** off your youtube sensation life caleb, and burn your cool kid in the sun, you see peter, there is no heaven, and there is no hell, you see if you are a

nice kid, i will, put you on the sun, ready to suffer in your next life, you’ll never know, peter, i might bring you back to hole in the wall canberra, in a poor neighbourhood

you see peter, i am destroying the life of crocus’s current earth body, by giving him sore feet, and keeping the cool kids away from him, like brattayley, i know that brian’s

grandmother on his mothers side is there as annie, and slim dusty is hayley, and if they return after the funeral of caleb, i have powers to take the cool kid off

these kids, ted bundy said, because, what i was doing on earth, was turning people off, showing the world their fresh legs, peter said, let us go, ted bundy, please let us go

i will never lose my reign, and your next life will certainly know it, peter sargent, peter said, i will make sure, you suffer, and ted said, think about it, brian allan wants to be famous and living in adelaide

but money is keeping him here in canberra ok, so you will never get what you want, while you have to understand, even the rich people who are seldom getting what they want

in theory, are being bashed or murdered, or maybe even both, this world isn’t good, and that is because of me, ted bundy said and caleb is suffering, as he doesn’t want to be *******

to the sun, he wants to be with bratayley, to live to be old, and ted bundy said heh heh heh heh we will make4 brian allan suffer as he wants to give greame thorne is wish of being famous

trying to beat ted bundy forcing his old mate patrick’s teasing voice out of his head forever, but what is happening ted is saying, let’s make brian’s school friends watch the professionals

and laugh at brian, yeah this sounds radically awesome said ted, granny is with slim dusty through annie and hayley, but because of caleb being snatched from there to be tied to the sun

will bratayley return, or will ted bundy get what he wants, no technology for young people, and this is a hard battle, but we all must stop the ghost of ted bundy, by doing what we want to do

as long as it is good, and realise if we do things that is bad, it’s ted bundy that is enforcing it

I am dreaming of a white Christmas
I say stop, cause it's too **** hot for that
You see instead of skiing and skating on ice
We are having barbecues and swimming in the pool
And instead of Santa coming down the chimney he goes through the computer screen and uncle robbie and jim bob
And Jacob lying on the beach getting a tan and if they are dreaming of a white Christmas well stop cause in Australia
It's too **** hot for that
You see kids are riding their surfboards
On Bondi beach and santa will join us
Everyone is having fun
And robbie pulls out six pack
And said lets get out backpacks
And hike through the kangaroo island bushland
If you dream of a white Christmas
Well stop cause in Australia it's too
**** hot
You see we go off the Queensland and sere the big pineapple and then go down to Coffs Harbour to see the big banana and mum is sweating in the kitchen cooking the Christmas bird
And we go to jamberoo to slide down the waterslide
And uncle Freddie said ** ** ** look at me go
I am dreaming of a white  Christmas
I should stop cause in Australia it's too **** too ****
Too **** hot

It is hard it is bad
As my bullies go into my body
They get in and rip out
Any family person energy I have
I want to do things
This year to make me feel happy
Like singing and working
But I don’t want to get bullied
You see he is ripping into my body
And pulling my heart right out
And then he says
I need to learn a lot of discipline
Even if it hurts your head
And hurts your neck
Making you say
WHAT THE HECK
Making me feel like a fucken kid
I know I like the kid life
But not to a bully
If the bullying stopped
There is everything I can do
I need to get it out for my Aunty sue
I know she has depression
But she was nice to me
I told her she was like Oprah
And she accepted with pride
I wish my dad would save me mate
From each of these bullies
I know rob Douglas said
I am not a good singer
But he is a liberal ****
I gave him to a republican Christian family
His new name is abram
And he is innocent as all kids are
But you can see the rob in him
I miss talking to Steve grigor
He was very nice to me
He is now dead
But because I say I can talk to the dead
The bullies bully me
Saying Woosey Woosey Woosey
Because they think
It is unfair how I use screens
While they have been raised away from them
Technology is cool
When I play on my iPhone
I get the hooligan itch
I am a lover of life
I know I want to hit people on the head
But that is just a bit of fun
I know people wanna do that to me
But they are bullies
******* paul berenyi
Or I will come back and
Tie you to the sun
And show the world
Peter says I was your case manager
At mental health
But now I am dead
In my next life
But Paul wants to bully me
But he doesn’t know
Up in nirvana mate
I am powerful

Movies movies are really good ya see
I like movies are sometimes very funny
Like Ferris buellers day off and ghost busters and weekend @ Bernie’s
Movies are great and sometimes cool
Cool is the word for it
Come on dudes please hang around with me
Cause I like movies because they are informative
They tell you who dies
And who was the champion
Yeah movies are good
And sometimes funny
Yes movies are so great
Movies movies are cool in some ways
Like rocky the boxer as welll as Star Wars too
You see they brought the muppets into the real world
And rocky and bullwinkle and toy story the kids are very amused
Movies movies are really really cool because people on movies
Gets an academy award
Sometimes they win a lot
Other times just a little
But they act in the movie
And win an award
Yeah movies are very cool
Movies movies are bringing the past and future to you like back to the future and tomorrow people too
You meet some interesting characters from times you won’t be around in because movies are the a part of people’s imaginations
Movies movies are good and sometimes bad
I like movies cause they really entertain us all
With their incredible acting and imaginations and many many more
Movies are great really great
Cheer on movies for us

I AM HEARING MY RIBBER IN MY HEAD, SHOWING ME, THAT I WAS WRONG





YA SEE, WHEN I WAS YOUNG, I WAS LOCKED IN A SCHOOL CLOSET

AND I SAID, TO MYSELF, I WANT TO GRAB KIDS ON THE MOUTHS

AND MAKE THEM SCREAM, YA SEE I GRABBED DAVID ON THE MOUTH

AND HE WAS A COOL KID TO ME, BUT I HATED BEING LOCKED IN THAT ROOM

SO I TOOK REVENGE ON THE SCHOOL, BUT MICHEAL WAS TOO STRONG

BUT I MANAGED TO GET A WRESTLE IN, WITH HIM

YA SEE I WITNESSED CAMERON BEING *******

AND I HEARD THAT BOY IS NOW DEAD, BUT HE TRAPPED ME

IN MY HOUSE, SO CAMERON CAN PLAY

I HAD FUN PUTTING MY HAND AROUND DAVIDS MOUTH

AS WELL AS ATTEMPTING TO GRAB GARY BAKER BY THE MOUTH

AND I ALSO FANTASIZED GRABBING A BULLY MARK, WARD

BUT I DECIDED AGAINST THAT, CAUSE HE WOULD BULLY ME WORST THAN MICHEAL

AND I TOOK REVENGE ON THE MALL CROWD, BY BEING THE COME HERE GRABBER AT THE MALL

BUT I GRABBED ‘EM AND LET THEM GO

LIKE THAT KID, I TIED HIM UP, AND LET HIM GO

I AM WRITING, THIS CAUSE I AM A WRITER, ARTIST AND YOUTUBE ENTERTAINER

ALL THIS WAS BECAUSE I WAS KLOCKED IN THAT STORAGE ROOM

AND I FELT LIKE KIDNAPPING PAUL BERENYI, BUT HE WAS A TEASING BULLY TO

PLEASE STOP TREATING ME LIKE A PHEDAPHILE OR KIDNAPPER

I MADE A MISTAKE, JUST LIKE ZANO AND PAUL MADE A MISTAKE BY LOCKING ME IN THE ROOM

CAUSE, REALLY DUDES, I WAS RESCUED, BUT STILL I HATED BEING IN THERE

PEOPLE USED TO GRAB MY WALLET AND TEASE ME, BY TOSSING OVER MY SHOULDER

I GAVE JAMES PEDERSON, HELL, I WAS TRYING TO BE LIKE THE BIG MEN OF MY PAST

BUT I ENDED UP BEING A BIG WORTHLESS

YA SEE, I RIBBED DAVID, MY OLD SELF IS RIBBING ME AT PRESENT

I WRESTLED WITH BOYS AT SCHOOL, MY OLD SELF, IS TREATING ME LIKE AN ANIMAL

I AM NO ANIMAL, I AM NOT STUPID TO STAY WITH MY OLD SELF

THE RIBBING CAME FROM NOBODY BUT MY OWN SELF

THE SHUT UP ****, WAS FROM MY BROTHER

I HEAR VOICES SAYING CHRIS ISN’T AROUND ANYMORE, BRIAN

I SAY, LET ME GROW UP, WE’RE NOT AT SCHOOL ANYMORE

BUT I AM LISTENING TO MY VOICE OF MY CHILD SELF BACK IN THE 80S

WHAT HAPPENED TO ME, HAPPENS TO MOST COOL KIDS

I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY MY OLD SELF CAN’T EXCEPT ME IN MY CHOICE

TO BE AN ACTOR, I AM HAVING MEMORIES OF PAT SAYING IN AN ANGRY VOICE, YOU’RE NOT LIKE US, BRIAN

YOU WILL NEVER BE LIKE US, I WANT YOU TO GROW UP PAT SAYS IN MY HEAD

I TOLD HIM TO TAKE MY OLD SCHOOL SELF, UP TO THE COSMOS WHEN WE SLEEP

BUT IF I FEEL LIKE I DID LAST NIGHT

I WILL SIT AND DO MY TAPESTRY, TILL I EVENTUALLY DROP OFF

CHUCK METHANE ON DAD, CAUSE HIM AND ROBIN WILLIAMS

WILL GROW UP TOGETHER AS TWINS

I KNOW I AM GETTING OLDER, BUT I LIKE TO FEEL YOUNG

THAT’S WHY I WRITE AND DO ART

BRIAN ALLAN TAPESTRY PROFILE FACE BOOK

AARON CLAYTON AND AAA YOUTUBE TV ON YOU TUBE

BRIAN ALLAN ON ART COLONY

JOHNNY GEORGIE BROWN ON HELLO WRITERS

WRITER JOE ON WRITERSCAFE

AND I AM NOT WOOSEY FOR LIFE, OR COMPUTERS

I SIMPLY TOLD CANBERRA OFF, FOR LOCKING ME IN THE STORE ROOM

CAUSE I AM HEARING PAT MUCK AROUND WITH MY OLD SELF

MY HOOLIGAN IS DEAD, AND SCATTERED

UMMMMMMMM GOOD RIDDENS TO BAD STUFF IN MY HEAD

UMMMMMMMMM  I WANT TO SAY, KIDNAPPING IS NOT MY STYLE

UMMMMMMMMM I DON’T WANT TO KIDNAP MYSELF ON MY FAMILY

UMMMMMMMM SO I WANT THAT LITTLE KID DEAD

UMMMMMMMMM I BROUGHT HIM BACK, TO THE STREETS

UMMMMMMMMM TO SHOW, CANBERRA, MY HOOLIGANY COOL KID IS DEAD, MY ***** KID, SO TO SPEAK

the rain is coming as a torture that aqueda has plans for cronus




you see last night, cronus and athena, put the terrorists in the sun

and in the course of the day, osama brought on heavy rain to canberra at

2.45 pm and this is sort of a way, of keeping cronus in for a while

so, he can’t be a young dude, of cool kid to the young

at present the wind and rain is coming, it sounds nice

a pretty look, but just after cronus put the terrorists in the sun

well, the rain is the answer, to hide the goings on, of what

is really hanging, ya see each terrorist, is being set free by osama

but dad, wanted me, to enjoy life, so under crocus’s spirit, he

hid the sun, from canberra, as it was a chance, to fight to keep

the terrorists strapped down in the sun, ya see the reason why

i say this, the terrorists are trying to get me to tie myself up

and keep cronus from telling the world, and force cronus

to be a little woosey to a tease, while dad fights off these

terrorists, just to make sure, they stay, dad used all of

his science stuff he knew, to force his son cronus to be

safe, as his spirit, can be unleashed to help barry allan

become the new helper of athena and cronus, to help

buddha mend every blade of grass, ya see, the rain

was also caused, by a big tidal wave, in jupiter, where

sam kinison and paul berenyi are taking surfing lessons, and at

present if you open up your third eye, your imagination

you can see this big surfing tournament on jupiter

ya see at present the leader is olga chick, and leo

had as just said he was special agent as his previous life

was known as jupiter’s special agent surfer, while they were

on earth talking about the baby twins

and olga chick has just been announced the winner

but athena and dad under crocus’s power, are battling a hard

thunder, which the terrorists are causing  thunder over canberra at 3 pm

this is going to be a tough journey, but we need to calm these

terrorists, ya see, paul berenyi flied off saying, we need to show olga how to have a good time

leo is a little cool kid, and sam kinison fled off to help

my dad battle the terrorists, trying to escape the sun

but athena, crocus’s power through dad and sam kinison and buddha

are keeping these terrorists down, you see one terrorist is the

witch doctor who kidnapped and killed 8 year old patrick dunbar

my life before greame thorne, and i am suffering, trying to rid this evil ghost

now paul is trying to use the cosmic energy that athena showed him

to keep these dead terrorists, starpped down, burning there hooligan in the sun

the rain has stopped, but the terrorists are still trying to cause more thundery rain

for cronus in CANBERRA, make the canberra people suffer the terrorists say

yeah they are off the earth, but they can cause petty little stupid bogus crimes

which could stop people thinking that the terrorists are really bad

don’t get ****** in, HELP ME keep these terrorists strapped to the sun

make the thunder not ruin

start to recycle, start to look after the earth, enjoy life

but be aware, this isn’t the end, i was kidnapped by ted bundy after ted bundy died

and so was brendan from next door, yeah

the terrorists are worst now, keep them strapped down

bring my tying myself up up to jupiter, so i can be free

The Saturn Ball, on Saturday June 8th, 2013




You see kids nowadays are having so much fun and these kids
Are inspired by the great Saturn Ball which was started by Peter
Sargent, and Scott McDonald, whose current earth lives are
Enjoying psrying together as well as tying each other up, and
On Saturn, Peter and Scott are having a big party where they
Had dancing girls like Marilyn Monroe and Elizabeth Montgomery
And also Dana Reeves as well,,and Peter Sargent is as *****
As a toad, and he is trying to get in the head of Brian Allan, because
He liked how Brian was nice to him before he died, and to get into
His head in the form of his best friend Patrick, you see Peter
Sargent died to get into Brian's head to make sure he doesn't poo
His pants, because I actually was cool to his point of view
When he saw me in the Page Tavern all the years ago
And it was about that time, when Patricks voice was getting
Into full swing, and it was driving me crazy miss daisy
Before then Scott McDonald died and also got into Brian's head
And he chose Patrick's voice as well, but he was the voice saying
Brian is not like us, Brian is not like us,,Chris used to be like us
When he was really really young, but Brian isn't like us,no way,,no fear
The thing is, Peter and Scott aren't worried how they use these voices
They just want to make Brian be cool to a young dudes point of view
Because, Scott thought Patrick was weird, and didn't want to be
In the same room as him, and despite me trying to talk to him
Scott wanted just to tease me, cause I wanted to be like Patrick
And there was only one opportunity and that was to die and get unti
Brian Allans brain and push Patrick's voice trying to tease him
Scott said, I am not a family person anymore, I want Brian to suffer
So we'll turn Patrick against him by holding our own Saturn ball
And Patricks voice was also Peter Sargent trying to put into Brian 's
Head that Patrick was Joining the young dudes
To tease Brian, I couldn't understand this, and I said
Leave me alone Pat, but his voice was Peter Sargent
Saying to Patrick, you are like us, and Brian Allan is a little shy boy
Who has no known friends, anyway, Patrick is the innocent party
He still likes me, you know it was Peter Sargent who planted his
Voice from the sound of Patricks voice to bug the **** out of Brian
But the main reason was that, Brian had it give up beer
And work on himself, and eventually he will figure it out
Peter Sargent, and Scott McDonald, who got into
Brian's brother Chris's voice in trying to make Chris doing what I did with Patrick
Which means Patrick mucked with Chris as he would muck with me
But hello, it was really Peter Sargent and Scott McDonald
And in the last two days, Peter Sargent and Scott McDonald are
Holding the first ever Saturn Ball, and everyone is partying all night
And Peter Sargent is pushing onto his brain, and the earth life
I somewhere on earth going through a lot of trouble
Peter Sargent cracked open the wine bottle and everyone partied

The schitzophrenic


You see I am sitting at the mall
I am having dillusions of people teasing me, and I wish this will all stop, oh please, just leave me the f..k alone
And then I hear voices that aren't really being said o hear Jon killed my best friend named Fred, the thing is I have no best friend, oh year
1 2 3 4 do the schitzophrenic
From the first diagnosis till the day you reach 45, you see if i take medication it can be controlled yeah oh yeah
I am schitzophrenic
Then I went to see my psychiatrist and he told me, to try and get a life, I told him I was blackbeard and John F Kennedy, he just threw a smart *** comment my way, I thought that comment was rude and ******, yes it is hard to be liked when you do
1 2 3 4 do the schitzophrenic
Yes it's easy to do, just let me hang out
You see with my medication it can be controlled, ooooh
I am schitzophrenic
You see I get paranoid when I see people around and right wing governments want us locked up
It mighty hard to have this illness and I cab say this
1 2 3 4 do the schitzophrenic
Do it once and you get all hooked and after that you feel like a geek, cause your a schitzophrenic, and also with medication it can be controlled
Oooooh I'm a schitzophrenic
Yes, that's true