(c) Dec. 15-2005 John Stevens

(V1)
When trouble comes around you
And you don’t know where to turn.
Look up and see Jesus standing there.
He will take all your sorrows
And give you peace within.
Just look up and see Jesus standing there.

(V2)
When love seems so distant
And you feel lost and alone.
Look up and find Jesus waiting there.
His arms are open wide for you
To take you as His own.
Just look up and find Jesus waiting there.

(V3)
When hope has all but gone
And darkness closes in.
Look up and find Jesus kneeling there.
He is reaching down to lift you up
From the pit of despair.
Look up and find Jesus kneeling there.

(V4)
When joy comes upon you
And you don’t know who to thank.
Look up and see Jesus smiling there.
His grace does surround you
His mercy brings you through.
Just look up and see Jesus waiting there.

(Chorus)
Look up and see Jesus
He waits for you to call His name.
Look up and see Jesus standing there.
Look up and see Jesus
Receive His gift of love for you.
Look up and see Jesus standing there.

(tag)
He will take you in His arms of love
And give you peace within.

A wasted life, from fog of use.
Scars untold, years of abuse,
Bends the mind, from right to wrong.
Life out of tune, no longer a song.
Scars so deep, it covers the heart
no hope shines through, no point to start
to erase the pain, it seems insane
To a life gone wrong,

Through the fog, a point of light
Shone bright,
At first, then to fade, to die
from self pity and pain, from the lie,
Can not forgive the pain of past.
Can not forgive myself, to last.

Through the fog, a hand reached out.
Took my hand, I had my doubt.
Been there, many times before
The hurts and hang ups, seemed to soar.
The voice said, “You are forgiven.”
“It's time to trust, to start livin'.”
The chains fell off, I was free.
To start anew, To trust, to BE.

A wasted life, in years of fog    
Now Forgiven.

For a week all I heard was...
   “You coming to the Big Game?”
Every where we went
to total strangers... it was the same.

Saturday arrived
  (oh sleep, where art thou)
in all it glory.
Eight in the morning
  (oh breakfast... later)
that's another story.    (yawn!)

Calling traveling, double dribble
was off the menu today.
Staying on the same court, now
that was a challenge we say.

Ref Jerry blew the whistle
Stopped... to tie some shoes.
Can't have a star
fall on the court and lose.

Tony got the ball, dribbled a yard.
Stopped.  Eyed the net.
Upward! Upward! Upward!
Almost had it...  I lost my bet.

The excitement rose high
in the stands this day.
For the efforts  freely given
the Kindergarten way.

Coach Clay with his gentle spirit
quietly lead his team
Passing, dribbling, shooting,
Oh the faces did beam.

Excitement ran high
on and off court this day.
Shoot it! Shoot it!
Upward! Upward! They play.

A Great Poet has passed away
He came into our lives with much to say
About life,living and dying in his poetry.
I am a better man to have known him today.

The words he wrote will live on forever
Inspiring others in their poetic endeavour
We remember the man behind words so clever
Who set the bar high and did not waver.

May the Peace given to you in your final hours
Reach out to all who know you Dear Paddy.

See ya later my Friend.

The diaper fell to the floor
assisted by a tiny hand.
A grin spread from ear to ear
“I am free and here I stand.”

Freedom is short lived it seemed
On it goes, “I must have dreamed.”

“I try so hard to be cool.”
“They said something about a stool.”

Sixteen months and training for,
The  Riviera... “I'm out the door!”

© 1-07-04 John Stevens
v1
He waits at the door of my heart this hour
Knocking so gently for me.
To answer the call, through His power
To be all I can be.          
The choice is mine to make this hour.
To accept or reject His love.      
The choice I make for eternity
Will decide my life for above.

(chorus 1)
What will I do with Jesus?              
What will I say to Him?
Will I turn my back and walk away?
Will I open my heart to Him?  

v2
Will I invite Him in only on Sunday
And set Him close to the door?
Then invite Him out when church is over
When no one's looking any more?
Will I when Monday morning comes
Forget the lessons He taught?
Of love, forgiveness, grace and more
By His blood on the Cross He bought.

(chorus 1)
What will I do with Jesus?              
What will I say to Him?
Will I turn my back and walk away?
Will I open my heart to Him?  


v3        
Will I do the right and shun the wrong
In the work that I perform?
Not leave my faith on a hook by the door
Until the next Sunday morn.
Will I park Him outside some of the doors
Of my favorite places to be?
And pretend it is ok to do the things,
I'm ashamed for Jesus to see?

(chorus 1)
What will I do with Jesus?              
What will I say to Him?
Will I turn my back and walk away?
Will I open my heart to Him?  

v4              
The lessons I have learned today
Must not be shelved tomorrow.
For I've been set free to do His will
In all happiness and sorrow.
He cleansed my heart- all the rooms.
And the closets so dark today.
His love shone 'round in all the corners
The gloom and darkness went away

(chorus 2 )
What will I do with Jesus?              
What will I say to Him?
I will open my all my life to Him
I will open my heart today

v5
I will open the door, invite Him in.
I will give Him the key to my heart's door
I will give Him control of all my life.
I will love Him forever and more.
I will listen to His every whisper.
I will do His thoughts for me.
I will praise His Holy name this hour.
I will shine His light for others to see.

(chorus 2 )
What will I do with Jesus?              
What will I say to Him?
I will open my all my life to Him
I will open my heart today

v6
When my heart is breaking from the pain
Of things in my life I start.
He is there the moment I breathe His name
He mends my broken heart.
I have been forgiven by His blood
My sin on the cross He bore.
I have been forgiven, cleansed by His blood
I bare the guilt no more.
Chorus ?  

I have been forgiven..    
Praise His Holy Name.                
I am forgiven.........
Thank you Jesus, today.

-----------------------
He waits at the door   Calling for you
To open your heart     To let Him in.

What will you do?       What will you say?

Version 03-29-2004
Mod.9-27-04

Author:  Kristen Stevens
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Words are wonderful
Current mood:  amused

So last year for Christmas I bought myself a dictionary. The Oxford American Dictionary to be exact. (psst it won out over the others because it maintains that "irregardless" is NOT a word and thus remains improper...hooray!) Anyway back to business. I was going to buy myself a thesaurus this year but didn't find one I liked. Oh, there was a pocket version that was entirely suitable but I didn't find a hardback one that really worked.

I really think people should have to read the dictionary then they might speak with more precision. One of my favorite sayings, and I am being facetious (sarcastic for those who don't know what "facetious" means), is "I think I unconsciously knew that." NO YOU DIDN'T! You can't unconsciously know anything; you can subconsciously know it. if you are unconscious you aren't thinking anything. It is your subconscious that prods you. sigh

On a semi-related topic, etymology is fascinating. I would be willing to bet most people don't know the roots of the word "unanimous". Un (one) and animus/anima (heart, soul, mind)  So it's not just about people simply agreeing about something but putting their soul into it as well. Handedness is very prejudicial. Grrr you rights!! All words dealing with being right-handed are good skilled (droit, derecho, recht, etc), but lefties all seem to derive from the Latin siniestra (sinister)  or a imply "clumsy". Just look at "ambidextrous" ~ right-handed on both sides. 'ambi'-both + 'dexter'-right (side note: no wonder Dexter is a serial killer) It's opposite word is "ambivalent" that means 'left handed on both sides'  I love learning new things.
So as a left handed-American I feel constantly belittled by the daily assault on the way I was born. I can't help it. Hahahaha. No, just kidding I'm tougher than that. I've learned to cope and no longer fear the right handed scissors.


Last interesting thing:
The French mer, Italian mar, Spanish mer, etc all derived from the Latin word mare ("sea"). Latin derived it from the Sanskrit MARU, which meant desert, sterile element where no vegetation grows. I am going to find out how lifeless desert became an ocean teeming with a plethora of life.
MARU would be also the origin of the latin morire (to die).


OK wow lot to read, congratulations if you stuck with it. reading skill has increased +5 Ah-hahahaha I couldn't resist. If your game you get it; if you don't, how sad. Oh wow look at the time why am I still awake? sighstupid insomnia

(scale of 1 to 10)

1 - Shallow, Narrow, Short
                    TO
10- Deep, Wide, Endless

Shallow -  It's all about ME!
Deep -  It's all about THEE!

Narrow -  Limited Perspective
Wide -  Unlimited Perspective

Short -  Conditional: until... whatever.
               (one night stand)

Endless-  Unconditional: Forever.
               (Life time stand)

       1[ ]  2[ ]  3[ ]  4[ ]    5[ ]
       6[ ]  7[ ]  8[ ]  9[ ]  10[ ]

No one is a 10 but God,
But we can strive to be like Him.

The little girl stood, with cone in hand. The ice cream on the ground.
The tears welled up in her eyes, as people stood around.
Tears fell like rain, her heart was breaking, she didn’t know what to do.
Then through the tears, saw Momma kneeling… Saying, “Momma’s here for you.”

Momma said to the ice cream man “Another ice cream please.”
“Stack it high and pack it tight.” “We’ve got things to do and see.”
The little girl melted into her arms The sorrow turned to joy.
When Momma’s near, all is better For Momma’s little girl.

Oh, Momma loves you Brenna Girl, forever and always.
When things get tough, call on Him He will lead you through the maze.
When you get to Heaven, many years from now. You will find me waiting there.
I’ll be by the ice cream stand a waiting Just for you to get there .

The little girl grew to a fine young lady. The time went by so fast.
She learned of things not of this world. The things that will always last.
You could see Momma and the young lady, Walking side by side through life.
When things got tough they called on Him, To help them through the strife.

Oh, Momma loves you Brenna Girl Forever and always.
When things get tough, call on Him He will lead you through the maze.
When you get to Heaven, many years from now. You will find me waiting there.
I’ll be by the ice cream stand a waiting Just for you to get there.

Momma cried when Brenna died. As they lowered her in the ground.
Tears welled up, in her eyes As people stood around.
Tears fell like rain, her heart was breaking. She knew just what to do.
So she looked up high to see the Father And heard “Brenna’s here for you.”

Brenna loves you Momma Dear Forever and always.
When things get tough, call on Me I will lead you through the maze.
When you get to Heaven, many years from now. You will find her waiting here.
She’ll be by the ice cream stand a waiting Just for you to get here

Oh, Momma loves you Brenna Girl Forever and always.
When things get tough, I’ll call on Him to lead me through the maze.
When I get to Heaven, a few years from now. I’ll find you waiting there.
You’ll be kneeling right next to Jesus While waiting for me to get there.

Good night sweet Princess. See you in the morning

(c) 04-07-2012

When the curtain draws closed on my mind
And leaves my body alone.
Think of the times we were together,
The times we talked on the phone.
———————————
Remember the times we would walk on the beach.
Hand in hand always in reach.
The moments we shared - together each day.
The love we shared in every way.

Though the hours get long that make up a day.
While you are sitting with me in your caring way.
Remember the times we would take a long walk.
We would get an ice cream, just sit and talk.
Remember. Remember for me.
——————————–
Remember the seasons of flowers in bloom.
We’d walk through the meadow, nature’s room.
We’d hunt down asparagus along a fence row.
Bring home a bunch and fix it just so.

Remember at Christmas the lights on the tree.
The gifts for the children from you and me.
The smells of the season that filled the air.
The laughter and joy of people who care.
Remember. Remember for me.
———————————–
Remember the moments our thoughts would blend.
No spoken word between us would send.
The thoughts of love and things to be.
Would cross the distance ‘tween you and me.

Tell me over and over again,
Of the things we use to do and when,
Times of laughter and times of fun
We had together, under the sun.
Remember. Remember for me.
—————————–
When the curtain draws closed on my mind.
And leaves my body alone.
Think of the times we were together,
The times we talked on the phone.

As yesterday’s memories caress your soul.
Close your eyes, imagine us whole.
Where some day we will be together again
Where memories won’t fade, we will again begin.
Remember. Remember for me.

( 2P or not 2P)

Poets and Pigeons,
two P's in a pod.
Some are very humble
Others think they are god.

Throw them a few crumbs
and they will peck at your feet.
They're a most grateful lot
That you will ever meet.

If the morsel is really great
They will eat out of your hand.
Wanting MORE MORE MORE
Pecking MORE than they can stand.

They jockey for position
on the feeding chart each day.
Numbers, NUMbers, NUMBERS
Is there any other way?

Some pigeons stand afar
not risking  getting close.
Others land on your head
In hopes they get the most.

There are those who flutter by
and leave deposits in your hair.
"There are better morsels just ahead"
As they develop a pigeon stare.

They envision better food ahead,
like cows at the wires.
It's always tastier over there
Turns out more like briers.

And so it goes in pigeon world
Juking along making their mark
  (or is that leaving their mark)
Showing others where to find
Crumbs in the vast poet (pigeon)park.



So there you have the 2P order
Oh! I think this could be me.

Or not.

"Papa. Read my the four little pigs and the BIG BAD POUF." With emphasis on the big bad "POUF", we begin the fascinating journey of the pigs and the rehabilitation of the "Pouf".

My granddaughter (age 2) loves the story and when ever we come to the Big Bad she says the "POUF" part. It rather sounds like a French pastry.

The fourth pig, as everyone knows, is Momma pig, she sent the defenseless little pigs out the door with a warning, "the BIG BAD "POUF" likes to eat little pigs." Seems to be a common malady of "Poufs" and Humans.

The BIG BAD "POUF", we are told, watched from the top of the hill where he lived. He was a considerate "Pouf"... letting the little pigs build their straw, sticks and bricks houses before offering to be a building inspector to test the strength of straw and sticks. The "Pouf" condemned the first two houses... huffing and puffing and all of that. All the hair on the little pigs chin could not stop the tinsel strength test performed by the Big Bad "Pouf".

Everyone knows that brick is stronger than straw and sticks but we have a Big Bad "POUF" that begs to differ.  Consequently, he ends up in hot water, much like Humans who make bad decisions.  Not the brightest and smartest choices made in Pig/"Pouf" Land.  At least this pig did not put the lid on the *** and have "POUF" for lunch.

The "POUF" became a reformed "Pouf" staying on his hill top.  No more Big Bad for him.  Kind and gentle. A NEW "POUF"!

Now 60 years ago the Building Inspector in this story got into hot water and became the lunch of the brick house pig. The other two pigs became lunch of the "POUF" but I suppose I will not be telling that to my two year old any time soon.  

There are many versions of the story. Things have changed over the years.  The Three Little Pigs live happily ever after and the "Pouf" now stays up on the hill and is a GOOD BOY.  Getting into hot water can be a life changing moment... provided the lid is NOT put on the kettle.  Moral to this story... stay away from pigs who carry hammers, trowels and squares. Or.  Don't be a blow hard.

(c) 02/14/2012 by John Stevens

Ref Jerry, promoted again this year
to the Mighty Kinder Teams.
Raises the growing Kinder Spirits
to achieve even higher dreams.

The Kinders play their very best
So unaware, they don't even know it.
Week after week, excelling, growing
in the Upward Game they show it.

A slam dunk thrill is even possible
with a lively, uplifting Ref Jerry assist
Lifted high to the rim of the lofty basket
It was hard to have missed.

When the hoops were allusive
high fives did still abound
For the valiant effort of each play
Mighty applause did resound.

As in the Big Kinder Game
The Ref of the Universe is there
To lift us up when short of the goal
To help us, our burdens to bear.

He picks us up in times of need
holds us high for the goal to reach.
He keeps us safe with rules of life
Covers our Sins with a lesson to teach.

Upward! Upward! Upward still!
The goal is in sight as Upward we go.
In His love. In His hands.
It is all we need to know.

Now go and play the Kinder way
Do your best with all the rest.
Keep your eyes on the ball...
There may be a TEST.

(c)06-25-06   John L. Stevens

As I walked in the darkness
In the middle of the day.
I stumbled down the road.
Not knowing Your way.
I was broken from falling
Fear dwelled deep within.
I trusted only me,
To see me through.

Then I saw the light shining
In the middle of the day.
I could see without falling
As You lighted the way.
Your light shone around me
And took away the fear.
I learned to trust You Lord,
To see me through.

As I walk through the valley
Of the shadow of death.
I will fear no evil
To befall me.

As I walk into the darkness
at the end of the day.
Your light shines around me
and shows me the way.
No fear dwells within me
as my journey here will end.
I trust only You Lord,
To see me through.

As I walk through the valley
Of the shadow of death.
I will fear no evil
To befall me.

For Your rod and your staff
Are with me to the end.
I will step into the light.
I will see the glorious sight.
I will finally be at home.. in Heaven
I will meet You face to face… in Heaven.

I was blind but now I see.
Your light shines around me.
I was blind but now I see… Your face.

Life seemed to ****.
The pain seemed so real.
The drugs seemed so easy
To change what I did feel.

At first it seemed to help
To cover up the pain.
But the ******* sound I heard
Was my life, down the drain.

The hole I found myself in
Got deeper by the day.
Hope seemed to fade from me
That help was on the way.

The help I sought and found
Was the “friends” who got me here.
Those who had the ***, the ****,
The drugs and the beer.

The family I once had loved,
Seemed distant from me now.
My love had turned to hate
By the love of drugs somehow.

The hole caved in on me
From a distance I could hear.
“We loved her, Oh so very much”
“We failed her. Somehow my Dear.”

They pulled me from the darkest hole
I, myself, had dug.
And took me into their arms
To rescue me from drug.

The days turned into many weeks.
My head began to clear,
To see the ones who really love me.
My hate was not so near.

A cloud of doubt and guilt rained down
For the things I had done.
Soon love returned to fill my heart
Where once the drugs had won.

Forgiveness came from those who loved,
To me, for the many years.
For the pain and sorrow I had caused
To them, through many tears.

A group of families gathered ’round
With love so great for me.
I soon discovered through the tears
Their abundant love was free.

I felt the love of those who care.
I learned to love again.
To care once more for what I’d lost.
To trust and live within.

When temptation comes to my door
To offer me a high.
Let Love instead answer the knock
And with Serenity say - goodbye!

(9-22-04 added 4 lines)

This story has not ended.
It will continue for a life time.
Life is about decisions we make on a daily basis.
It dictates what we will possibly do tomorrow
based on what we do today.
Life is built on decisions.
The end of the story will be written when
we meet the One who loves us unconditionally.
The One who died on the Cross for us.
(2-22-04)

Love triumphs over adversity when God is in it.
“Never give up” must be the words to live by.
Progress is made even when there are two steps
forward and one step back.
Thank God for the progress.
Hope lives on in the hearts of those who trust Him.
(2-8-06)

All is well. Just a few rough edges to smooth out. Hope lives on. Never give up.
(6-29-18)

The boy left home to become a Marine.
He trained with the best you’ve ever seen.
There were times early on he longed for home
But with the family of Marines he was not alone.

The boy, who left home became a man.
To protect the freedom of this great land.
He put his heart and soul to become the best.
To become a Marine, He was put to the test.

He went to Iraq to free the ‘people of tears’.
From the oppression suffered thirty some years.
He served with bravery in face of fire.
With fear in his heart, but with freedom’s desire.

The Marine, the man, comes home again.
To his family and friends who prayed for him.
He left a boy, just months ago.
He returned a man, a Marine, with freedom in tow.

© 1-24-2006 J.L. Stevens
V1
Oh Mary do you see your Son
High upon the hill?
Your Son has come to this world
To do His Father’s will.
Behold the Lamb Oh Mary.
High upon the cross.
Behold the Lamb who shed His blood
To rescue you and me.

V2
He finds me in my deepest need    
When darkness comes around me.
He gives me peace in my soul    
And sets my spirit free.
I am baptized with His Spirit
He meets my every need.
Behold the Lamb of God
High upon the throne.

Chorus
Behold the Lamb of God
Who takes away my sin.
Behold the Lamb of God
Who cleansed my heart within.
My name is written there
In the Lamb’s Book of Life.
He is the great I Am.
The Savior of the world


Chorus

End
Oh Mary you are with your Son
The Savior of the world.

Went to the word market
looking for bargains.

found some:    cheap PAIN
                          cheap LOVE
                          HURTS galore.

In the fancy alluring boxes
Almost ****** me in.

Rack on rack:  Disobedience
                          Bad Choices
                          PLEASE NO MORE

All went in **** Bags

Box upon box of
A clean looking place
nothing fancy

I saw baskets full
Running over
                          Faith
                          Hope
                          Love.

­                          Redemption
                          Gr­ace
                          Mercy

ALL WERE FREE.

Some of the same words
used differently...
Love was fulfilling
Pain and Hurts were still there
but in the distant memory.

Redemption and Hope were
in strong demand this time of year.

There was "scent of Rose"
lingering in the air.
Memories of love
caressed my spirit.  

The place was not crowded
the people were the best.

Broken Child
Broken Home
Broken Parents
Broken Lives

Broken Promises
Broken Vows
Broken Love
Broken Future

Broken...


When will it ever end?

09-15-2012
Saturday morning and Grandpa rounded up the grand kids, Tony and Lucy, for a little excursion. Excitement was running high for we were going to the City Park and… there was to be hot dogs, burgers and drinks and STUFF, which they thoroughly enjoyed. Before we left on our fun-outing, I had printed out a copy of a poem I had written for Tony when he was a year old called "Ice Cream". He is now a big seven. There were many booths setup which we visited… gathering STUFF (pencils, etc).

We stopped at a booth that was for grandparents raising grandkids. While we talked with the lady at the booth I remembered the poem in my back pocket. I gave it to her to read and we continued on down the line gathering STUFF (pencils, candy and BUBBLES). On the return trip we stopped again at the grandparents booth. The lady commented, the poem brought tears to her eyes. Then she said, “this was written from the heart”. At that time Tony interjected with, “No. Grandpa just sits down and write them on the computer keyboard.” Yup! That is how it REALLY happens. There were chuckles and smiles all around. Tony is grandpa’s most ardent promoter for his web sight . He tells people the domain-name to find writings. There is one piece he particularly enjoys telling people to check out called "The Boy Called Tony" . Go figure!

The years have flown by, it seems like
yesterday we met, quite by chance.
Me, a backward country boy,
You, a beautiful girl in a red coat...
And a walk that made my heart skip.
Little did I realize that moment
would last forty five years.

As we grow old together
As we we stand at each others side
in happiness and sorrow,
in sickness and health,
May we always remember what
brought us together.

“John?” “yes.”, says I
“You are supposed to take Pennye,
in the red coat over there, to the party.”
Being backward and stupid in the ways of
“setups”, I said,  “OK.” and
walked over to you and said,
“You are supposed to go with me to the party.”
“Ah, OK.” you said, looking a little shocked.

I fell in love with the “girl in the red coat” that night.
A love that has not wavered,
Has withstood the test of Time
A love built on God's love.

Here we are, raising two grand-kids
who puts a smile on my face and
sometimes a frown..
You remind me, “He's only five.”
“Yes, but, but, I think he is fifteen.”

Then,
I must remember how much God loves me and
try to do the same for those close to me and
not so close to me, who irritate me at times..

Your love for me is amazing, Babe.
I would be a most miserable, old man
without your love.
It shall forever be mine and
My love shall forever be yours.
Oh, and that little blue dress with the white strip
at hip level?  Sigh. They don't make those any more.

Tony and Gpa were driving down Blue Lakes when they were approaching a construction site. The work had been going on for some time but today it was really a mess. Tony said, “why do they make such a mess of the ground grandpa? It looks really bad.” Inspiration hit me. Relate this messy lot to life.

“Sometimes things have to look really bad before it can be make into something beautiful and useful. A piece of canvas can be laying around for years, *****, a mess and then someone picks it up, cleans it off to discover it will work perfectly for a painting. The spots are covered and the artist begins the first brush strokes. Soon, what was ***** and no value to anyone becomes a wonderful work of art by the masters hand. ”

“It is much like people. They can be ***** and broken, look a mess because of drug use, not living right.”

“God can pick them up, clean them off and begin painting a beautiful picture. Where once was a disaster now it beauty.”

Granted, the above is a little more but not much more, than what gpa said to Tony that day. The italic was added when gpa wrote this.

Anger, envy, strife, and unforgiveness ( your choice here) can soil the canvas of life. Words said in anger can never be taken back. All the other hurts and hangups in life can dissolve into the background when forgiveness is granted and accepted.

Forgiveness can cover many a stain and when the light reflects off our picture only the beauty of forgiveness reaches out to others. I know many forgiven people. Beautiful people.

(Heaven and Earth)

June has gone on ahead of me
Looking down with a smile today.
She has been renewed forever
I am getting older by the day.

My body has many cracks,
Crevices and creases.
"chugging along", missing June -
For Love, it never ceases

Resting on a swaying foundation
God has been good to me
I'm "chugging along" waiting my turn
My Glorious June to see.

I've got Memories by the dozen,
Reminiscences by the score…
The day I stop remembering…
is the day I'll close this door.

My World will have ended
Heaven bound I will be.
Where June is ever waiting...
For her Stan she will see.

My World will soon end
Temporary it has been.
God is calling me home
Where Eternity will begin.

God went to Zero
Tolerance yesterday noon.
All are in Hell now.



(c) John Stevens

Life is but a weary road
      You hear some people say.
      You hear the moan and groan from them
      As they travel along their way.
      
      Always complain and gripe of things
      And take for granted life.
      No thanks they give to God above
      But go to Him in strife.
      
      They know not Love and Patience
      And understanding within.
      For Love and Patience passed them by
      And they're troubled deep within.
      
      'Tis Love that makes a man's life grow
      And a woman's life grow too.
      My inspiration and this Love
      Comes from only You.
      
      I've given love and in return
      God's given you to me.
      To love and cherish every hour
      And give myself to thee.
      
      The happiness of knowing you
      The knowledge of your love.
      Brings joy and peace within my heart
      And a smile from above.
       - - - - - - - - - - - -
      Written 1966 but still is true in 2003
      Love ya Babe.

      And in 2018
      And in 2019...
      And ....  forever.

Oh where oh where has my binky gone.
Oh where oh where can it be.
With its ****** so clear
It gives me much cheer.
Oh where oh where can it be.

Did you say toilet? Oh no!

That “Grand Idea” of traveling
         going with the Snowbirds
                                     as in herds
Changing with the Seasons...
For what ever reasons...

Changed when seven pounds
               of squirm and delight
         was cradled in my arms-
          five years ago that night

Instant Love as from Above
Never to cease, never to release
a 24/7 little boy, Tony Boy,
             (and Lucy too)
     Filling my life with Joy.

I wondered at times
      how it would be...
Retired...
     Just my wife
         and me.

And when I weighed the cost
Thought of the loss
Someone else called “Grandpa”.
The little voices saying “Grandpa!”, “Poppa!”
Rang louder still, louder beyond all measure
than all the sites and sounds the world could offer.

No other decision was possible to make
Than to spend my life raising my “children”
Building memories, building lives.
Instilling character the only way I know...
   Loving and living,
       and when necessary -- using words.

My “children” will live their life,
        living memories,  
        giving memories,
        creating memories,
of times when they were young
Saying,      “I love you Grandpa.”
                    “I love you Poppa.”
Hearing,   “I love you too my child.”
Knowing, “See you in the morning.”
                      Refers to Heaven.

“The greatest love you can show
is to give your life for your family.”
     (It is a paraphrase but
     consider the original Author.)

Little Bird – (Forever and Always)

When I read to Tony at bed time, there are times his little sister Lucy is there for our nightly ritual.  When all is read and eyes are closing, I say to Tony,  “Good night Tony Boy.  Love you forever and always.  See you in the morning.”

One afternoon Lucy (2) climbed up into my big chair and positioned herself just so.  When all was snuggled in, she looked up at me and said, “My love you grandpa.”  Of course I do what all thinking grandpas do… I said, “I love you too Lucy.”  A moment goes by, a little shifting in the nest occurs, and I hear, “My love you grandpa!”   Now the reasonable thinking grandpa would say, “I love you too Lucy Girl.”  Which I did.  But that was not the end of this conversational delight. Then she looked up into my face with some consternation on her’s and said, “How come you don’t say ‘forever and always’ grandpa?”  “Oh Lucy Girl.  Grandpa does love you forever and always.  Yes I do.”  With that affirmation of love she settled in with a smile on her face and snuggled up tighter.

What may seem to be a small thing to big people is a really BIG thing to the small.

I have reached the pinnacle of joy when Tony Boy and Lucy Girl are snuggled in… one on each side.  “All is well.”  At least in my world it is.

When my Mother died this summer in June 1991 I felt set adrift in a vast ocean. Things would never be the same again. My mother would not be there to pray for me in the middle of the night. How would I survive this world without her praying? Maybe worst of all, I couldn’t go home again.

The home as I knew it growing up and until that day, had vanished in a moment’s time. The pain of the loss was not real, it seemed like a dream. I did NOT want to finish the last bits of paper work that needed to be done. That would make it all final.

I heard a county western song by Kathy Mattea, “Where’ve You Been” on TV in November. Five months after Mom died that song brought the total grief to bare that I must have suppressed all this time. It brought back memories of Mom saying “Where have you been” when I was over due to return home. She was concerned about my safety. Up until then I had not shed but a few tears. It finally hit. Hard.

Today, Sunday, Jan 12, 1992, I realized that I will be going home again. That the home my mother made for her children on this earth was not the home she had prayed for all these years. The sacrifices she made to raise four kids in adverse circumstances were made with love. They were made with a final destination in mind that few realize. The most important goal in all of life - to give your kids the love and understand of who God is, really is. Jesus went to prepare a place for us – the home coming of eternity. Mom is at home with Jesus and waiting for her children to come home. “Where have you been” may be on her lips again but I rather think it will be “I am so happy you made it home. Welcome home to stay; I want you to meet Jesus”.



Post comment 2010
My mother had the ability/curse of knowing when something was wrong with one of her kids.  I remember in 52 when my brother was in Korea.  We received a letter from my brother and my mother was happy. Two days later, it looked like a cloud had descended on her and she went around muttering, "something 's wrong with Eddie, " over and over.  This went on for three days and then the cloud lifted.  Later we found out the POWs working in the kitchen had put poison in the food.  My brother was close to death for three days.  My brother has the same curse.  He is 78 this month.

Today... June 6 2018
Mom is at home with her son Edwin, daughter Lois and son Wayne. I am the only one left to go home.

Grandma was wrapping gifts
Lucy, four, was "helping".
One of those times when
help slows you down.

Me, I am sacked out on the sofa
Waiting for sanity to return
and relieve me of a bad cold.

Grandma went to the kitchen
Lucy stayed wrapping.
In a few, she comes over to my hole
where I am residing and says,
"Grandpa, I brought you a present."

I looked up and there she stands.
Wrapping paper taped around her arm.
She said, "Go ahead and open it Grandpa."
"Open it?  Your arm?" being a little slow.
"Yes Grandpa open your present."

She stands there with this
expectant expression beaming.
A moment later the fog cleared
Grandpa open the wrapped arm
and with great "surprise" exclaimed!
"This is the best Christmas present ever."
"I love it!"  I kissed her arm and Lucy's face
as a smile spread across her face.
"This is the best Christmas present
ever Lucy.  Thank you!"

And she was off to the next adventure.
Never know what she will come up with.
Every day is an adventure.

© 1-16-2005  John L. Stevens
(verse one)
I was walking down the highway of life
Doing my thing , and creating strife
In my life and others around me.
Then I found the highway Jesus walked.
When I took His hand in mine.
-Chorus 1  ------------

(verse two)
Jesus took away the pain in my heart.
Gave me peace, a brand new start.
In my life and others around me.
For I’ve found the highway Jesus walked.
And He takes my hand in His.
-Chorus 1  ------------

(verse three)
Jesus is the road under my feet
Leads to the Cross, with grace complete.
In my life and others around me.
Now I travel the highway Jesus walked.
As He takes my hand in His.
-Chorus 1  ------------

Chorus 1
Gladness and joy found me,
Overtook me in my sorrow.
Gladness and joy dwells in my heart
And gives me hope for tomorrow.
Yes, He gives me hope for tomorrow.
-------------------------------
(verse four)
Oh brother do you need a new road.
Follow the savior, He’ll carry the load.
In your life and others around you.
When you find the highway Jesus walked.
When He takes your hand in His.

Chorus 2
Gladness and joy will find you.
Overtake you in your sorrow.
Gladness and joy will dwell in your heart
And give you hope for tomorrow.
Yes, He’ll give you hope for tomorrow.
-----------Repeat Chorus one

(rev.2-25-05)

Oct 13

A new chapter began in the Life of Tony Boy in October. His Daddy got out of prison after spending over three and a half years away. Tony was 2 months old when it all began. We kept a picture of his Daddy in the living room and talked to Tony when he ask about the picture. His Daddy and I kept in touch by letter, but that is a different story.
A couple a days after Tony’s Daddy, (TD), arrived back in Twin Falls, we met at the City Park. We were on the Court House side and TD was on the other side. We started walking toward each other and when Tony was about 100 feet away from his Daddy, he started to run. Tony ran and jumped into his arms. I never saw any thing like that before and did not imagine that would be their first meeting. I must admit that there were tears in my eyes. It was as if they had been apart for just a few days.
For the next three hours, the two of them ran, jumped, wrestled around, and just had a lot of fun. It was really great to see them going hand in hand around the park. Me… I sat in my chair and took it easy for a change. If you have read some of the other stuff about Tony you know we spent a lot of time at the park. Several times I heard Tony say, “I love you Daddy.” I found out later that TD got rather misty but he kept it inside. I guess that comes from trying to be tough for the last few years. He did get stabbed 5 times in Boise and was moved to Orofino after that. But that is another story.
It was a little awkward for TD the first few times. How do you handle a rambunctious 4 year old when you haven’t had the experience before? TD was a quick learner. He observed how I handled Tony and used the same methods.

So for a month now we get together several times a week. Sunday we went to lunch at Addison West. Tony was wired and wanted to play. A couple sitting in an adjacent booth apparently observed the goings on and had a bit of fun with Tony when they left. The lady started to leave and turned around and said, “You sure are a cute little boy.” Well I can’t argue with that.
I will add more to this as time goes by. Tony is sitting here wanting to go to the park. Soooo,,, a guess it is time to GO TO THE PARK.

I’m back. Did not make it to the park. Low blood sugar hit and I had to cope with that for a while. We did get to the grocery store later. I was thinking about second chances. In conversation with people over the years I have said, “what is done is done and there is not anything you can do to change it. It is what you do with today and the tomorrows…. that will make a difference.” I wrote a piece called “Jail (Redemption)” about the time TD was in jail. Some young folk I have talked to are rather surprised to find old dudes like me can think this way. It all boils down to this. I am just a beggar trying to show another beggar where to find the Bread of Life. I would be in deep yogurt if it were not for redemption.

She was crying
  The mistakes of the past
    were weighing heavy
       on her heart.

"Why do I always pick
the same kind of guy...
Over and over and over."

"I thought this guy was different.
On the surface he was really nice.
We liked the same things and......
I believed him!"

"Underneath he was a RAT!"

"Will I ever find someone who will
love me for who I am NOW....
not what I WAS in the past?"

It was a question for which
I had no answer.

She is a beautiful young lady
who has climbed out of the
pit-of-the-past in the five years
I have known her.

Her brown eyes have changed
from a hard look of years of
drugs and abuse,
to a most wonderful softness.  

The softness comes from being
set free, forgiven, of her past life.
Unfortunately, people aren't
very forgiving and are
users and abusers.

As I looked into her eyes
I saw her heart and
God's love shining through.

Sometimes the fog of deception
can cloud our judgment when
the people we have come to trust
lets us down...   become  RATS!

Maybe just being there will help.
She could be my daughter...

It has been seven years since Paddy posted his last poem. I am taking the previlege to bring it back up top. Please read his poems.

Paddy Martin Jan 2011
An Australian Summer Sonnet.
I pray thee sun thou should set,
or take thy leave better yet,
wouldst at last my thirst be gone,
But alas thee linger, and linger on.

There be no flower not yet dead,
no water flows in yonder river bed.
'Tis a heat where nought doth grow,
nor doth thee ever mercy show.

Dry of skin and parch of throat,
a man doth need no overcoat.
Thy rays doth burn mine eyes,
they do not hear mine mercy cries.

If there be a place where chill be found,
'Tis there it be that I be bound,
A place where there be no burning sun,
show it to me, so to it I shall run.

(c) 26th January 2010
with apoligies to all you Shakespeare freaks
I was thinking how Will would have handled our Oz summer heat.

e3Author:  Kristen Stevens
Tuesday, May 05, 2009
happy thoughts
Current mood: blissed out

Going to try something new for this one. I'm going to be happy or an approximate facsimile of it. Now you may ask, how does one go about getting into a happy frame of mind?

-Well, I find browsing the bumper sticker app is a good way if you are using your computer as a sole ***** of happiness.

-Watching the HMV hell video on my main page makes me giggle like the school girl (let's face it I was never a giggly school girl but the metaphor works)

-Thinking about how few people will actually survive the coming zombie apocalypse due to their utter stupidity finally catching up with them. (oh, I believe I’m getting giddy now)

-2012 because whatever is/is not going to happen people are going to lose their minds and well, I call it culling of the genetic herd.

-Milk, it does a body good. (I know, I know for any grammatical stickler out there it should be “does…well” but that’s not the line)

-Dr. Who, although I’m still waiting for my TARDIS boarding pass one day my doctor will come



Ok I’m going to quit now. If I get any happier, I might do some permanent damage to my cynical synapses. *contented sigh

(c) 03-15-2016
The cold has gone
What once was brown , now green.
The air is cool
Spring in the air can be seen.

Players are gathered
Practice begins
for the games
to see who wins.

The ball is pitched
Ball aloft at last.
Runner touched home
the point is cast.

They finesse the ball
as they throw and trick.
To out wit the opponent
as the endings  does tick.

They win they lose
this season thus far.
Led by great coaches
has been better than par.

When the games are done
whether lost or won.
It is all in the fun
As they have a great run.

©5-24-06

The canvas of a child’s mind
Is blank when he is born.

The mind of a child is like a garden in the spring time
It is planted, watered, and nurtured , and over time grows
into something beautiful.

Many times I just need to stop what I am doing and listen… listen to what the “still small voice” is trying to tell me. Taking time to smell the lilacs, so to speak, to soak in the beauty around us, to reflect that God really is God and not a figment of our imagination, is what life should be about. Turning off the things that interrupt our mind (tv/radio/neighbor/spouse ;-) , etc) and listening and seeing the simple joys in life, gives me peace for today and hope that tomorrow will be even better.

My joy these days is in a 24 pound little boy who entered this world 13+ months ago not under the best of circumstance but loved just the same. I would not trade him for all the money in the world. He is the light of my life. When I come home very tired, it would be easy to do what I want… rest, but the look on his little face when I come into the room somehow sparks a little more energy in me to pick him up. He lays his head on my shoulder, gives a sigh, and all is well with the world. Actually, all is well for both of us. Sort of like laying your head on the Lord’s shoulder.

In the spring time, gardens are planted and begin to grow. For him, (my grandson) his mind is like a garden. The seeds planted in his early life, the time taken to talk and play with him, watered with love and compassion, will grow and develop and hopefully the beauty of his garden will crowd out the **** seeds that the winds of the world blow in from time to time. Love always triumphs over hate if you never give up.

I know many kids never had a chance at an early age to grow and bloom into a beautiful garden. Years later, **** killer (God) was applied, the soil tilled by His hand, revealed the potential of their garden. The gardens they grow are beautiful in the eyes of our Lord and Savior. When someones garden is getting a little dry, we need to help water their garden with love, compassion and understanding from our abundance. The small things that don’t cost much but have a big impact on the growing beauty of a garden are important not only to children but to big people as well.

Is there any better way to spend our time than to nurture a growing garden? I think not. I may not live to see my grandson’s garden bloom and produce great things as he becomes a man but I know God will honor the planting and watering I do beyond the day He takes me home.

7-1-08
Time has passed and my grandson is now three. What an age this is. New learning, every day, is taking place and I am a part of it. It is a great honor to help plant God’s love in this little boy. Now that I am retired we are out and about many days of the week. We are still chasing squirrels, watching for fire engines and high flying jets, and meeting new people in the park. Some of the new people are pretty nice and Tony knows which ones they are.

A reporter followed us around last October during one of our many visits to the City Park in Twin Falls Idaho. She did a great job of writing a story about nothing of importance, but it was and is important to Tony since it was about him.  “Walk in the Park” search in the Times News will get:


http://m.magicvalley.com/lifestyles/relationships-and-special-occasions/taking-a-walk-in-the-park-with-grandpa/articlecef84065-d992-5a06-a1c8-631123517f4e.html?mobiletouch=tr­ue

7-5-08
Well it is the day after turning 65, my feet hurt after a morning of “walking in the park”. Tony rode his trike and I got some needed exercise. Today is a great day. Yesterday I was not feeling all that chipper and may, yes just may, have been a little grouchy. It happens when my glucose level gets too high. I made a comment to one of the family who brought home a burger in a paper sack… “you got any grouch pills in there?” A few minutes later I heard Tony say to someone, “we need to find Grandpa’s grouch pills.” It cracked me up and we did not need to find the “grouch pills”. The little guy has a way of shining a light in the darkness and brightening up the whole room. I imagine God is laughing and I suppose God finds our “grouchiness” to be rather silly. Actually it is rather pointless, non-productive, and self-centered activity that gains nothing… oh where did I leave those grouch pills. Aaah yes, thank you Father. I needed that. When you can’t find your grouch pills just look up and se Jesus.


04-03-2021
Time has passed... can you imagine that?... and I’m still here at 77.  Tony is now 16. He has great plans on what he wants to do. May it happen. He will be driving the old man now.

Probably 6 years ago October 31 we were in McDonald’s. Tony and Lucy were dressed for the occasion. The lady behind the counter asked if I was going to dress for Halloween. I told her I was already dressed... that I was going as a grumpy old man.  Been practicing all year. She just laughed.  See what I have to put up with???

Quietly, I bow in Your awesome presence.
Quietly, I listen to Your voice calming my spirit.
Quietly, I feel Your arms of love surround me.
Quietly, I sit as tears of Joy flow through my soul.
Quietly, quietly.

Quietly, my soul cries out as Your Joy lifts my spirit.
Quietly, my heart sings of Your Glory and Majesty.
Quietly, I experience the Love that only You Oh Lord can  give.
Quietly, peace settles over me in the aloneness with You.
Quietly, quietly.

Quietly, Lord, You are the still small voice in the storms of time.
Quietly, I wait for You to move in my spirit.
Quietly, I wait to receive Your direction for me to live.
Quietly, Your love engulfs me, my spirit soars to the utmost heights.
Quietly, quietly.

You go to church and feel His love
All is well in heaven above.
Then Monday comes.
Then Monday comes

The problems you face on the first work day
Seems to last forever and won’t go away.
For Monday’s here.
For Monday’s here.

The real world’s there staring you in the face
How you going to manage without God’s grace.
For Monday’s here.
Is God near?

Relax and trust God, He can take you through
Give Him your trust in what you do.
For Monday’s here.
But God is near.

Is your peace deep enough for the real world now
Can you trust Him enough to not have a cow.
For Monday’s here.
And God is near.

Let His peace settle over you in the quiet of your life
Open faith’s door and let out the strife.
He waits at the door.
Go open the door.

Now don’t you feel better since you’ve talked to God?
The stress level’s down, you can feel it in the ***.
For He’s with you now.
So now you know how.

My Father was my example.  I have a lot of my father's traits.  He was a man of few words but his actions of caring carried much weight. Growing up on a farm in Western Nebraska, it seemed that it was a place where sandburs knew no bounds.  They were everywhere.  My father wore bib overhauls that had big pockets in the back. When I was little, the pockets were just right to fit my feet.  When we came to a sandbur patch, he would pick me up and carried me over the sandbur patches.  When I was tired after being with him on the farm and hot from the scorching summer heat, he cared for me.

My heavenly Father is my teacher through prayer, his word written and spoken and through the lives of others like my Mother and Father and many others.

Jesus is our example.  Growing up and even today, the 4 words that keep me going in the right direction are: What Would Jesus Do.  There is no better example to follow.

As a father, I try to follow the example of my heavenly Father.  There are times I fail miserably and must ask for forgiveness from my family.  My heavenly father never fails me.  He carries me through the sandbur patches of life.  He loves me unconditionally.  Some day I will set foot on the heavenly shore as He carries me over the last of life's sandbur patches on my final journey of life.

Even though I have never heard my earthly father say, "I love you son", I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he loved me.  When I would say to him, 'love ya Dad" his reply was always "uhuh".  I can't hear my heavenly father audibly say "I love you" but I know from all He does for me His love for me is beyond words.  His love transcends the audible and speaks directly to my heart.
              
I tried hard to not bring shame on my mother and father.

Shy smiles
lite up the sky.
Let go of the past
and said good-bye
Friends pop up
and now say Hi!
It's good to see Sye.
Way up high.

Reconciled Love
Promises Kept
Self Faded
Vows Restored
Committed Lives
Stable Home
Child Loved
Unbroken Love
Un-broken Child
Un-broken...

© Feb. 16, 2003 John L. Stevens

I bow quietly before You Lord,
With heaviness on my heart.
You know my need oh Lord, this hour,
Before I even start

I give You my plea on bended knee,
I trust your answers to be.
That which I need and not desire,
You know what’s best for me.

Touch my heart once again
Heal my spirit from above.
Touch my life once again
Fill me with Your love.
———————————–
I bow quietly before You Lord,
With thankfulness in my heart.
For the answers You’ve given me,
Before I even start.

I give to You my life oh Lord,
As I abide in thee.
Your grace and mercy I receive,
Your strength and life in me.

Touch my heart once again
Heal my spirit from above.
Touch my life once again
Fill me with Your love.
———————————–
I bow quietly before You Lord,
With gladness in my heart.
Your love fills me with such Joy,
Before I even start.

I give to You my praise oh Lord,
For the peace You’ve set in me.
As I listen to Your will for me,
For the Answer that’s to be.

Touch my heart once again
Heal my spirit from above.
Touch my life once again
Fill me with Your love.
Fill me with Your love.

It was spring time after a long hard winter in Idaho and my family and I went to Nebraska to visit my folks.  This was more than 20 years ago but in my memory is as if it were yesterday.  I remember this time because when we arrived the weather was warm and my dad was still wearing his long underwear.  He had not been taking very good care of himself and I offered to give him a bath.  The long underwear came off leaving patterns on his skin where the underwear had pressed against his skin for a long time.

While the rest of the family and visiting family were talking in the living room, Dad spent some time soaking and getting the winter’s accumulation off.  He was rather pink when we were all done.  I noticed that his toe nails had grown long and down under, it could not have been very comfortable.  After getting him dressed in clean cloths we went into the living room.  I prepared a wash basin of water to soak dad’s feet some more and  got out my trusty nail clippers.

At some point in the 30 - 45 minute process all the conversation going on around me disappeared in the background and I was left with the feeling of being at the feet of Jesus and washing His feet. It was one of those moments in life that defines something in your life that you haven’t noticed before.  Even now, I can sit and reflect on this moment, which happens many times throughout a year, and imagine Jesus washing the feet of the disciples.  It is difficult to describe in words the emotions of this brief time in my life.  It had a profound effect on how I looked at those around me.  The opportunities were there all along.  I just had to open my eyes and “see” what God placed before me.  We see what we want to see most of the time.   Some place along the line, life changed from being “about me” to being “about Him”.  It was so liberating and freeing in my spirit.

Did anyone in the room realize what I was experiencing?  No.  This was something that was between my Lord and I and for a long time I kept it to myself.  If I remember right, the day I relayed this moment to my wife, she had tears in her eyes.  Maybe you have experienced moments that could inspire someone to be open in their walk with God.  Tell them.  You will be glad you did.

(c) 10-2014
It has rained
What once was brown , now green.
The air is cool
Fall in the air can be seen.

Boys are gathered
Practice begins
for the games
to see who wins.

The ball is passed
kicked at last.
Through the goal
the point is cast.

They finesse the ball
as they pass and kick.
To out wit the opponent
as the clock does tick.

Winning all they played
this season thus far.
Led by great coaches
has been better than par.

When the games are done
whether lost or won.
It is all in the fun
Played under the sun.

The chirds are burping,
the blowers are flooming.
The droys are beaming
Of firls so gine.

The dees are boing
what dees bo best.
So loys bet's do
what dees bo best.

Hind the foney.

April 17, 2008   (it has been 7 years since I stood here)

Anna Bell Williams

It is morning in Heaven for Anna and the angels rejoice.

I have known two great women in my life time.  The one who raised me and guided my life to become the person I am today and the one who allowed me to marry her daughter who helped me get over my backward ways.

There has not been a mother-in-law joke that ever fit my mother-in-law, Anna.  She has been a sweetheart to me for more than 40 years.  I particularly liked Anna’s attitude toward me; you see,  my wife said her mother thought I could walk on water.  Well, I most definitely can not accomplish that feat, of course, but I was not going to tell her that.   There were times I did good just to keep from drowning from time to time.

Anna has always been a caring, giving lady.  When she saw a need in someone’s life, she would give assistance in what ever form was needed.  When her neighbor and friend became terminally ill, she spent many hours, days and months taking care of her, making her last hours tolerable.  In the process Anna led her to a relationship with Jesus.  This is just one example of how she spent her life.

She became a surrogate mother to a young lady who was dying of cancer and was there for her when she died.

She was there for her sister, running errands and helping around the house, just doing what ever was necessary to lift her spirit.  There are numerous stories, I am sure, many of you have, as you remember her life and how she influenced your life in some way.  Success in life can be, and should be, measured by the difference you make in another’s life as you pass through this short time we have on this earth.  She was very successful in life.

One thing I noticed over the years, Anna was always on the go.  She only had one gear and that was “fast forward”. The only time she was “in park” was when she was asleep.   She loved to go to the coast.  Just mention going to the coast and she was out the door and ready to go.  Well, maybe not quite that extreme,  but close.

It was difficult for her the last few years to accept slowing down.  And even more difficult, accepting help instead of giving help.  The last time we sat at the kitchen table having a cup  of coffee, she talked about how hard it was to not be able to do the things she wanted to do.  We got a little misty together that time.

Over the years I have written a number of pieces which I gathered together and gave her a copy.  That morning she said there was one piece she read over and over when ever she was down in her spirit.  She said the words restored her spirit every time.  I never found out which piece that was but I was deeply touched and honored that she found the words a source of inspiration.

She has run the race and finished the course.  The long night is over and a new morning has dawned for her where no pain or sorrow will ever again touch her body and spirit.

To paraphrase a small piece I wrote about what my life has been and I hope will be: and I believe she experienced as well—goes like this
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Here she stood as the evening of life drew near
She tried to follow the paths found dear
Paths of love and honor,  from examples she did see
From those before her, that she strove to be.

Here she stood, asking, “did I make the right choice?
Did I follow the loud or the still small voice?”
Now, she understands the power of love.
It’s the power given by our God above.

Here she stood to survey her life today.
She began and ended, on the edge of the day.
The choices she made, Jesus was always near
His Grace and Mercy has brought her here.

Now she kneels in His presence, the race is run
His grace sustained her, the journey is done.
He brought her through, the dusk, the night
To a brand new day, what a wonderful sight.
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We rejoice with you Anna.  You are home now.  You are in his presence now.

Goodnight sweet lady.  See you in the morning.