I speak
You yell
I scream
You force silence upon me
I just want to be heard, is that too much to ask for?

I want to change the world
You want to sit on your hands and moan
Oh I am so tired of this table tennis

Red spots begin to appear and my hands shake
Listen to me ******* it
I am not stupid! What I say matters!

Can you not see I do understand what you say
You have taught me I do not matter
What I say has no importance

Yet I sit here trying my hardest not to break
because all I want is for someone to listen
Someone to not yell or beat down what  I say

You and many others have taught me that will never exists
Not with me, not with them.
Not even with those you think are more important than those you love.

You have proved my point.

A heavy sigh, a salty tear creasing red cheeks
As us the struggling youth are taught even more by those we love we will never matter and we can do nothing to change that.

What do you think of yourself? Late at night when your makeup has been cleaned off, when your insecurities are more easy to notice?
Do you feel that you can do anything?
Do you feel ok about who you are?
Do you see someone else late at night? When no one is around and you don't have to hide yourself anymore.
Are you pretty enough without your face being painted?
I know it's a struggle dear to not show who you are.
I know you feel you cannot do anything.
I know you beat yourself up inside.
You see someone who is broken and flawed.
The make-up is a mask, a cover up to hide the pain you feel inside.
I want you to know, that I see who you are.
Don't hide behind make-up.
Wipe it off, show your pimples and scars.
Darling be who you are when you have no make-up at night.
Be who you are when you smile in the mirror alone, before people's thought invade your mind.
Because I will love you, no matter who you are.
I will love you, without make-up and masks.

That fight between the ears,
between love and war...

when love loses
and hatred oozes.

You've gone and lost control.
Your ego is on a
I Me Mine trip.

Let go
and do your back flip.

You kind of
feel like crying,
it has been
a long ride home...

Why don't you
roll up your sleeves
and dig in the dirt.

Go and repair the damage,
now that wouldn't hurt.

Oh Lord,
I'm a ******
for your junk..

so go and plunk your junk
right down beside me.

Forget about the grief
it doesn't really matter.

Don't hold
any cards up your sleeve.

Listen to the washboard,
guitar and harp.
All that banging on
the piano, it sounds so good


Just go on and get free
any way you can...

Come on if you want,
that's the way it's supposed to be.

Now I'm not lying
and I am trying
but sometimes it's
one step forward two steps back

So many mistakes, let them go,
just smoke up the smoke stack.

Where to go, where to go,
you have a beginning
and a middle part
but you can't
see the end....

Along Port Lake ,
where my emotions are at their apogee ,
With the blue heron , the smallmouth dancer ,
beneath the river birch , sycamore and
cottonwoods in withering days end
Beside golden waters in the sun swelled eve
Where God's artistic brush gently tints her hardwood
trees* ....

I'm disconnected from the world
I don't want to see the people on this earth in a swirl

I'm disconnected from my phone
I don't take calls no more I'm unbeknown

I'm disconnected from my music
I just can't hear no more in this cubic

I'm disconnected from my sweet love
I feel like an old unfit glove

I'm disconnected from my home
I don't want to live here no more I want to roam

I'm disconnected from reality
What Is real and what is fake maybe it's my mentality

I'm disconnected from my mind
The demons took their time

I wish I was plugged in
So I can live again

Red wasp stopped by the window
Man stopped by the world ,
only the surface of said world he truly
knows , running from fire , calmed by rainbows ,
on one knee praising mountains , before oceans
declaring them to be gods , amused with frogs ,
chaining dogs , slaughtering cattle , turning his
brethren into pawns
Explorers smashed in windshields
Warring , painful sequels
Always on the surface of the window
Seeking more* ...