get drunk. get really drunk. forget your name. forget where you are. forget how you got there. get so drunk that you forget her name too.
2. end up on the bathroom floor. end up in an empty bed. end up in an ambulance.
3. make sure to find pieces of her in everything. make sure it kills you inside. make sure every part of you aches when you hear her favorite song.
4. read old journal entries. read about how much you loved her. read about when she said she loved you for the very first time. read about how she left.
5. call her. hang up after hearing the first dial tone. call her again. wait for her to say, "hello?" then hang up.
6. realize that her "hello" sounded a lot like "i can't do this anymore."
7. think about how your bare bodies touched for the first time. think about how it felt like an electric shock. think about how electrocution sounds like a good idea to you now.
8. contemplate leaving. it can't be that hard since that's what she did to you.
9. write her letters. tell her how no matter how many times you wash your sheets, her smell still lingers. tell her how your new neighbor's smile looks just like hers. tell her how your heart stops beating when you hear her name. don't send them.
10. start to move on. start to forget which side of the bed was hers. start to forget the rhythm of her heart beat. see her with someone else. see her touching them the same way she touched you. collapse. repeat step 1.

catholic
bishops
wear
their
priest
ritual
red robes
thus
gather
around
the
holy
cathedral
fountain
to
cleanse
their
red cardinal
wings
in holy water

I’m getting bad again. Not the “I’m going to join a biker gang and drink whiskey.” No, it’s the “don’t keep the lights on, I’m never coming back” sort of feeling. How I can’t really tell you how I feel, and I don’t know why. So, please. Just let me go. It’s not that I want to do this to you. It’s that I want to do this to myself.

My mind is a puzzle that lost all of its pieces and I was already having trouble finding all of the loose ends but you’re making my heart melt in my chest and I forgot what I was supposed to be doing and your eyes are just the perfect shade of brown and I can’t stop thinking about how your hand looks wrapped around my own and everything else seems to disappear. Since you came, the stars seem to be brighter, and I started to listen to my music a bit louder to make sure I heard every word correctly, so when I told you I love you it was true because as fuzzy as everything is, I’m seeing you crystal clear.