if we close our eyes and i clasp
my hands together really tight, we can
pretend that i’m 7 again
so embarrassed to tell gram that i wet the bed
i smile and nod
through the wetness down my legs
nobody’s home to tuck me in
in a minute i’ll have to get up and take a shower, and then i’ll see
the blood.
every car that’s driving by slows down by our house
the drivers rubberneck into our family room
& peer over the kitchen counter to stare at my naked body,
a fender ****** on route 30
traffic will be backed up for miles
this accident has scars on its arms
this accident has shaky hands
this accident can’t look you in the eye when it says
i’m sorry
in 20 minutes, it’ll all be down the drain
i will send grace pictures
of me when i got my wisdom teeth out
and reassure her that the swelling won’t be that bad
after i clean the knife we can act
like nothing ever happened, until
the next time that i hurt someone
other than myself
longer poem than what i normally do. slight trigger warning probably.