HOW
After all these years
After all these  years.
HOW
Do I still feel the same
HOW
After all these years
After all these  years.
NOTHING
Nothing has changed
I almost forgot I was always messed up like this
I wonder
HOW
Have I managed to drown
DROWN
The voices
The pain
HOW
HOW
After all these years
After all these  years.
HOW
Do I still feel the same...

Wishing you were here
It's not the same without you near
I hate that now I live in fear
Because your gone forever
I wanted you to stay
I offered you a place to lay
Now there are no words to say
Because your gone forever
I'll hang My head as an attempt to dry my thoughts
But it will be my tears that drown me
In my onslaught
Because you are gone forever

Butterflies fly high
high in the sky
at night they try
to go somewhere to hide.
To hide from the dark
they fly and they fly
into the dark during the night sky.

In the black of night
not a twinkling light in sight
he shone as bright as the sun
too bad we were on the run

Had we not witnessed the death
not heard the last breath
we would be enjoying the party

But his mind was too preoccupied
too mystified
by the mysterious woman
consulting the doorman

Have you ever heard 'curiosity killed the cat'
boy you should have hid behind your hat
you were the guest
now your part is the test

You are ****** for all eternity
because of your naive mentality
so run you little lab rat
your being chased by the cat

I try to be the good girl,
The girl who has it all together,
But I'm not.

I'm the girl crumbling into pieces trying to find herself,
The girl who isn't sure who she is but knows what she has to be,
But that isn't the real me.

The real me wants to escape from that trapped box of everyone's expectations.
It seems impossible.
I want to find me.

But it seems to be the hardest thing that can be.
Who I am is up to me, but you see,
No one seems to understand that part of me.

have you ever felt like you were in a hurricane?
or losing a fight that wasn't a fight after all?
or feeling those feelings that aren't your's to feel?
drowned by the weight of the world and caught in its spinning wheel?
they'll say that you're not alone
they'll say that you're not the only one
but how do they know how it feels?
how can they tell you it's not real?

until they've...felt for themselves what its like to have your world cave in
suffocate on the words you can't say to the people you love and who love you most
they can't tell you that you're wrong
they can't tell you that you need to be strong
because they don't know how it feels to see the light you need to be alright
but not be able to reach, for safety

have you ever wished for something bad to happen?
cause pain is all that you know how to feel?
Guilt comes with the joy and comfort the darkness you appeal?
they'll say that you're not alone
they'll say that you're not the only one
but how do they know how it feels?
if they say it was never really real?
cause it feels so real

they need to see for themselves how it feels to be stuck in a glass box
everyone that you love is standing around
watching the world that you built burn to the ground
and as you run out of air, they say "we'll always be there"
because they don't know how it feels to see the light you need to be alright
but not be able to reach, for safety

and eventually
its like one, two, three
you'll wave that flag
let somebody in
and you'll keep telling yourself
its just a matter of time
before they see inside
and go to run and hide
from the skeletons
you hide with pride
cause for once you tried
to see the light inside
and reach for safety

how does it feel?
to know it was real?