Did I ever tell you,
Roses are my favorite,
In all colours,
With cherry blossoms round the edges,
And mint leaves on the side,

It was forget-me-nots,
When I was five,
But I still love their violet-blue,
And yellow freckles of pollen,
That melt with your eyes,

I liked sugar cubes then,
And honey in my tea,
With petals on my cake,
And I never screamed about bees,
When I played with the lavender,

I used to believe more,
Thinking everything was beautiful,
Like I could just lie on the grass,
Drinking lemonade forever,
And catching butterflies

I can't get enough,
Why should I control it,
When there's no barrier,

I don't feel enough,
Why should I stop myself,
You know I'm masochistic

Maybe I'll just shoot aeroplanes,
And let your cloud eyes wander,
Falling on bomb-dropping drones,
While I sleep underwater

I must have one of those crazy infections:
Bitten on the jugular,
With silent jaws,
And within an instance,
All the sounds,
All the colours disappear,
Leaving you to die,
In static and white

I feel my whole body soften
like wax when you hold me.
Your kisses set my skin on fire
and your eyes defibrillate my heart.

I love you,
Used to mean,
So much,
When naivety,
Was all we had,
Until nightfall,
Approached,
And the fire,
Died inside you

Life was a struggle,
Confusion and misunderstanding,
An unanswered question,

Life was safe,
Cautious and quiet,
An unopened book,

Flowers did not bloom,
They remained withdrawn and hidden,
Rivers never met oceans,
Never explored the sea,

There was fear;
Fear of knowing,
Fear of seeking,
Fear of finding,

It was unexplored,
Left as is,
Unchanging,
Undoubted,
Unquestioned,

But then there came a change,
A question,
A challenge,
A desire for knowledge,

And then life changed,

The flowers flourished,
One by one,
The rivers reached oceans;
Discovered new seas,

Fear began to fade,
There was nothing to fear,
Once there was knowledge,
Once life sought and found,

It was searching,
Learning,
Growing,
Changing,
Questioned,
Challenged,

­Now life can grow,
Change,
Live without fear,
Face the challenges,

In this new world,
There is exploration,
There is knowledge,
There is a new sun,

The birds can fly,
They can spread their wings,
Take to the sky
*And be free . . .

Fingerprints on my skin,
Smudged, blue, black,
Shadows in my irises,
Dancing on my lids,
Webs between my fingers,
All tangled with dust,
Rust decomposing on my lips,
Sleeping on bitter veins,
I'm haunted

His voice trails off like
a soft caress.
I can almost hear
the tremble on his lips
at the close;
the vibrations reverberating
through my ears.

I can't escape the darkness
of his terrible stare,
the determination burned into
the black stars of his eyes.

It makes me want to fall apart,
that gravitational pull
like a hook through my ribs,
caught on my lungs.

Yet another restless night,
Has passed me by,
My tired eyes barely open,
However, I find myself,
Incapable of unconsciousness,
My mind,
Aching with sleeplessness,
Tired of thought,
Longing to give in,
To dreams, to sleep,
But something within,
Rejects such simple necessities,
And gives me over,
To insomnia

Purple is the sky,
Cloudless perfection,
An image painted so meticulously,
Black silhouettes,
Of leafy trees,
Green only for the light of day,
Mounted over indigo highlights,
Orange streams from street lights,
Interrupting and completing simultaneously,
No stars shine,
This sky is moonless,
Yet the sun doesn't dare disturb,
The perfect violet sky

You say simplicity is a choice,
Always, constantly,
But not for me,
Whose bruised and broken limbs,
Are tightly bound,
In chains of obligation and promises,
In ropes of rules and restrictions,
Unbreakable bonds,
Keeping me from freedom,
Simplicity is not a choice,
It was, long ago,
Before I realised the path I was headed,
But now my options few,
Simplicity far away,
Death is my only hope

Descend upon the clouds,
moth-eaten words,
withered and frail
and at once, form the dust
that is the star of our mourning
and choke within the grasp
of the pale night.

And so, adieu.

I'm losing control,
Watching his body go limp,
In my mind,
Imagining his eyes rolling back,
And gradually closing,
Feeling his heart,
Halt to a sudden stop,
And visuallising his unmoving chest,
His head lolling and heavy,
The image unhinges me,
Heart too fast,
Eyes wide open,
Body shaking,
*Just another flashback

Stop counting stars,
Look me in the eye,
It's unsettling,
Too innocent,
The way you gaze at my shoulders,
Like they should collapse,

Stop watching the grass grow,
It's dead in my fingers,
I want you to stop me,
Don't let me speak

Black Chrysler.

White Ferrari.

Loaded barrel.

Dark corner.

Back seat.

Trigger, trigger.

Streetlight.

Unmade bed.

Bathroom floor.

Bang, bang.

When I meet your eyes
Wagner's thundering drums
fill my ears in a burst;
the symphonic waves
wash over my whole body
as I trace your skin
and the strings soften
into a delicate prelude,
simmering in my chest
as I breathe you in.
It's almost unbearable,
but the building sensation
of the sweeping harmonies
is intoxicating, all-consuming,
just as the feeling of you against
my skin and the warmth of you
on my tongue; the vision of you
from above, utterly devours my senses.

It's that same,
Nauseating feeling,
Stuck in my throat,
I could almost throw up,
That feeling of betrayal,
Poisoning my thoughts,
I lean over the sink,
I can't win,
Never,
I want to run away,
Because I can never seem,
To understand,
Why me?

I change my mind,
I want to die.

He thinks an over-dose,
Will seal the contract,
But now I'm over-dosing,
On something else,
Addicted to a drug,
More dangerous than any other by far,

Such a cruel drug is Love,
Luring you in,
Too fast, too soon,
Consuming all your time,
While you're loving every minute of it,
Leaving you dependant,
Desiring nothing but to close the distance,
Ever so vulnerable to heart-break

I saved you a spot by the fire.
Hold my hand for a while,
if only to watch time pass.
I just want your footsteps to
meet the door.

Please, come home.

A beautiful lie,
The city sleeps,
A silhouette in the night,
We had everything,
He screams,
Defying love and life,
You meant everything,
He falls,

Gravity is unforgiving

Your touch draws scarlet lines,
On my china white skin,
And complements this blood,
With painted purple-blue bruises,
Hurt, I run from you,
I hide, desolate and afraid,
We both know I could never conjure,
The strength to stay away,
Hence, I crawl - unwillingly - back to your arms,
I lock myself in your dark cages once more,
I'm crying,
But my tears won't ease this pain

Sometimes, the world pours from my eyes
and all light escapes me.

Have you ever tasted fire,
It's consuming your mind,
Burning holes through your soul,
Smoking and smoldering,
Blackening your eyes,
'Til you drown in the ebony dust

This is not a house filled with love,
Nor hope,
Respect does not reside here,
In this house,
The doors are closed to happiness,
The windows block out tenderness,
This house does not hold joy,
Or welcome laughter,

This house is consumed by depression,
Controlled by unbalance and deceit,
Conquered by dishonesty and lies,
Built on the foundations of mistrust,
Holding nothing but pain and misery,
This house is not a home,
But a prison of despair

My name across his chest,
In whiter-than-flesh ink,
That pulled his skin,
Like gravity,
Into each letter,
Blistered on one end,
With sunburn,
Forged sharp with his smile,
Brown eyes downcast,
The fleshy tattoo scars

Just like paper,
We'll fold and tear,
Change colours and fade,
But we'll always be,
Paper

Do you picture,
A home,
Enclosed in snow,
Juxtaposed with ocean sand,
And the blaring light,
Of a fresh white sky,
Gumboots and maples,
Cemented in the dampness,
Of mud and dew,
Ice and oak walls,
Dripping with the gold,
Of morning

Cloud-light fluorescents,
And sunscreen-scented, dust-polluted air,
Bones protruding through the skin,
Blue plastered on every surface,
Of every doe-eyed skeleton,
Wrapped up in white ribbon,
That burns holes in their spines

Love is unattainable; this is no exaggeration.

It is simply the way of my generation to dismiss all sentimental feelings in the name of reputation, but for some poor, idealistic fools still enchanted by the forgotten practice of romantic gesture.

I think of you and all of the memories
wash over me. Our intricate language of kisses,
our intimate habits, consume my thoughts.
I see the never-ending blue of your eyes
as they stare into mine, and my heart aches
with longing. I live every day in hope
of one more kiss, one last embrace.
Every breath is a wish for you
to be mine again, my only love.

Girls like me don't make the same mistakes,
They hide,
Fill their hearts with bubble wrap,
And their stomachs with stale air,
Stitch on someone else's smile,
Write falsehoods on their tongues,
Steel rods up their backs,
Pins in their fingers,
Nails behind their teeth,
Cushioned with no-nonsense policies,
And venom on their sleeves.

You can't dodge the bullet twice.

The cavity blooms
from the bones.
Twigs and bones,
hollowed out by parasites.

Will you catch me
when I fall for you

Why do we inflict,
So much pain,
On strangers,
On those we love,
Is it so hard,
For us to see,
The consequences