i s a b e l l a

Jul 2014

Joshua Haines

College

College is a cancer clinic.
At this university, you either live long enough to die,
or die until you want to live.
Kids drag backpacks like bags of morphine,
and are attached to their planners like they are their heart monitors.
You do your own chemotherapy,
as you poison yourself with debt,
and Friday night nickel shots.

Jul 2014

Joshua Haines

Trust

You stab me in the back with a knife,
and I apologize for bleeding on it.

Jul 2014

pluie d'été

the opposite of loneliness

what is
the opposite
of loneliness?

i am alone
on the top
of a hill
in the spring

i have fallen back
from my friends
my toes
curling
in sands of time
moving
with the tide

i am in a room
full of intelligent
funny people
whose pitch
matches my own

i'm lying
on the dew laden grass
of my garden
and staring at the sky
with his fingers
ensnaring
my own
anchoring
me
to the spinning
earth

what is the opposite
of loneliness?

maybe no one has felt it
and that is why
no one can tell

Jul 2014

pluie d'été

secrets

we all make the main characters
in the stories we write
have blue eyes
if ours are green
brown eyes
if ours are blue
and hazel
if they're grey

just so that
no one can tell

whose secrets
line the pages
in our favourite font

i s a b e l l a Jul 2014

NUMB

I’m falling again.
The falling where
my mind wallows
with my heart
till they combine
and the pressure
becomes too much,
so it leaves me numb.

#depression #pain #empty #numb

i s a b e l l a Jul 2014

voices

Your  voice
becomes  so small, all your hear are your thoughts.
Your voice
turns into a stranger.
A voice
you listen to every day;
A  voice
you  don’t  recognize.